• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

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Michael

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My name is Michael - I'm in my 50s - and have been diagnosed with clinical depression and received treatment over the last 14 years.

I'm married to the most supportive wife anyone could even hope for and have 3 wonderful and succesful children (well they are no longer children but it is hard to accept that sometime)

I, like most people have up and down periods in my life, I seem to be hovering at the moment on a ledge between having a good period or going back to a bad period. Probably because of things that have happened this year, which I was able to manage, but with christmas almost on us it makes things a little harder to bear.

I feel lucky in that being in my 50s I know I have not that long to spend in this life. Now that my family have all grown I would love my wife to meet someone else who she could have a happy time with what is left for her and I could just 'slip away' and be forgotten.

Life is what you make it - but life is also what is made for you by those around you - hard to ignore those controlling influences which limit the scope of your abilities.

I hope those that read other posts will achieve the benifit they crave for and not be too despondent when reading post such as this.
It can't be all bad - there are happy smiling faces when you look around, it's sometimes hard to get them to rub shoulders with you with the hope that some of it rub off on you.

Best Wishes for the season and for the new year

Michael
 
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The crazy Yorkshireman!!

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Dec 18, 2007
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Retford
Me too!!

My circumstances are almost identical and we share the same age group. I have been clinically depressed for as many years as you. It was compounded after someone tried to murder me. I was an off duty police officer when this occurred. I got little support from the police service. The reason being was that I was throttled to the point of death before someone intervened and saved my life. As I immediately recovered once my airway was clear, my colleagues did not identify the extreme nature of the situation. The assailant was only charged with common assault. I felt (and still do!) feel very let down. Coppers can be completely blinkered at times.

I have since been medically retired and I find it so difficult to keep a steady job. Even my present work colleagues have made a formal greivance against me because they say I stare at the wall for long periods (amongst other things.) Is there any support out there to help people like us in maintaining a job?? I am beginning to despair. I have served in both the army and the police but I feel like I have done nothing with my life.:scared:
 

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Mad Hatter

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Hi Michael and crazy yorkshireman. I'm new here myself. Can share your experiences myself so you are not alone in thinking what you do. Unfortunately it seems that mental health issues are still very much taboo in our society despite the efforts that are made to promote it as the serious illness that it is.

My experience is that unless people have suffered with it or know someone close with it then they are never going to understand, at the end of the day it's all ignorance. I just plod along and take no notice.

Regards

Dave
 
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The crazy Yorkshireman!!

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I agree

I entirely agree with you Mad Hatter. It has been my experience that people think that I'm just having a bad day. I've given up trying to explain clinical depression to anyone. Its pointless. My present employer is typical of the lack of knowledge and understanding - a local authority!!:tea:
 
mischief

mischief

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:welcome: The crazy Yorkshireman!!

I have since been medically retired and I find it so difficult to keep a steady job. Even my present work colleagues have made a formal greivance against me because they say I stare at the wall for long periods (amongst other things.) Is there any support out there to help people like us in maintaining a job?? I am beginning to despair.
The Job Centre Plus website Welcome to GOV.UK says the following about their role for people in work:

"If you are already in work
DEAs can discuss your current work situation with you. If you think you might lose your job for a reason associated with your disability or health condition, they can give you and your employer advice, and explore practical ways to help you keep your job."

Hope this helps! :unsure:
 
Megannie

Megannie

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Hi there,:welcome: pleased to meet you all.:clap:

I have given up telling people I have Clinical depression, they usually say "oh yes I've had that." Unless you or family have been affected by the devasting affects of CD it's very hard to understand. People understand my physical condition alright and yet I have been more disabled and in more pain from my mental one.:cry:
 
v01ce5

v01ce5

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Dec 11, 2007
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152
I´ve always wondered what sets clinical depression apart from other forms of depression, so I googled the term and came up with this definition from Wikipedia:

"Clinical depression (also called major-depressive disorder or unipolar depression) is a common psychiatric disorder, characterized by a persistent lowering of mood, loss of interest in usual activities and diminished ability to experience pleasure.

While the term "depression" is commonly used to describe a temporary decreased mood when one "feels blue", clinical depression is a serious illness that involves the body, mood, and thoughts that cannot simply be willed or wished away. It is often a disabling disease that affects a person's work, family and school life, sleeping and eating habits, general health and ability to enjoy life. The course of clinical depression varies widely: depression can be a once in a life-time event or have multiple recurrences, it can appear either gradually or suddenly, and either last for few months or be a life-long disorder. Having depression is a major risk factor for suicide; in addition, people with depression suffer from higher mortality from other causes.

Clinical depression is usually treated by psychotherapy, antidepressants, or a combination of the two. Clinical depression may be a stand alone issue having differing features in patients, or as part of a larger medical issue, such as in patients with bipolar disorder or chronic pain"
 
Fedup

Fedup

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I´ve always wondered what sets clinical depression apart from other forms of depression, so I googled the term and came up with this definition from Wikipedia:

"Clinical depression (also called major-depressive disorder or unipolar depression) is a common psychiatric disorder, characterized by a persistent lowering of mood, loss of interest in usual activities and diminished ability to experience pleasure.

While the term "depression" is commonly used to describe a temporary decreased mood when one "feels blue", clinical depression is a serious illness that involves the body, mood, and thoughts that cannot simply be willed or wished away. It is often a disabling disease that affects a person's work, family and school life, sleeping and eating habits, general health and ability to enjoy life. The course of clinical depression varies widely: depression can be a once in a life-time event or have multiple recurrences, it can appear either gradually or suddenly, and either last for few months or be a life-long disorder. Having depression is a major risk factor for suicide; in addition, people with depression suffer from higher mortality from other causes.

Clinical depression is usually treated by psychotherapy, antidepressants, or a combination of the two. Clinical depression may be a stand alone issue having differing features in patients, or as part of a larger medical issue, such as in patients with bipolar disorder or chronic pain"

:) Thx for the above , made easy reading .
 
Megannie

Megannie

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Dorset, UK
I´ve always wondered what sets clinical depression apart from other forms of depression, so I googled the term and came up with this definition from Wikipedia:

"Clinical depression (also called major-depressive disorder or unipolar depression) is a common psychiatric disorder, characterized by a persistent lowering of mood, loss of interest in usual activities and diminished ability to experience pleasure.

While the term "depression" is commonly used to describe a temporary decreased mood when one "feels blue", clinical depression is a serious illness that involves the body, mood, and thoughts that cannot simply be willed or wished away. It is often a disabling disease that affects a person's work, family and school life, sleeping and eating habits, general health and ability to enjoy life. The course of clinical depression varies widely: depression can be a once in a life-time event or have multiple recurrences, it can appear either gradually or suddenly, and either last for few months or be a life-long disorder. Having depression is a major risk factor for suicide; in addition, people with depression suffer from higher mortality from other causes.

Clinical depression is usually treated by psychotherapy, antidepressants, or a combination of the two. Clinical depression may be a stand alone issue having differing features in patients, or as part of a larger medical issue, such as in patients with bipolar disorder or chronic pain"
hi V01ce5

Thanks for that, yes that is all correct, I also have chronic pain syndrome but I don't even start to explain it. For the last five years I have walked with crutches on and off because of my arthritis, it's amazing how people can understand physical pain when they see the crutches. Still no way would I want people to have to suffer mental illness just so they can understand. I just plod on coping with the lows when they come and don't bother to tell people.:(
 
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Michael

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East Lancs
Hi

Clinical depression is usually treated by psychotherapy, antidepressants, or a combination of the two. Clinical depression may be a stand alone issue having differing features in patients, or as part of a larger medical issue, such as in patients with bipolar disorder or chronic pain"

Controlling Depression (as that is what I believe you can only do) is managed by my surroundings, be it the weather, people, my dog - whatever.
I find that if I am allowed to use my imagination I end up going down, I need to be able to control this, by keeping busy with other things is my usual way, having too much alcohol is another.

I have a VERY supportive family, but if I lean on them I find I start to try and take over their problems - which they don't want me to, if they want help they will and do ask - So I try and keep myself to myself.
Compromise is the key word, something else I seem to loose the definition of, but again I let my imagination run away with me.

So there you are, today I feel very level headed and on the straight and narrow, but it does not take much to lead me away.

My imagination is something that I do use in my job, and it has helped me tremendously, it just seems at times that it controls me and not me that can control it. Maybe this is the key to being able to move on - or is it my imagination that is trying to move me?

Michael
 
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Dollit

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Michael you sound to be in quite a strong place at the moment and I'm pleased for you. I had a wobble last night but posted on here and had a good nights sleep (and a bar of chocolate) and all is much brighter this morning. I think it's good to share our good times as well as our bad times. I can't speak for anyone else but when I'm ill the level times are locked away in a place I can't reach them and when I'm well I forget easily the pain of the instability. Thanks for being here. :)
 
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The crazy Yorkshireman!!

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Retford
Bullying & Harrassment

:mad:I have just been through the most horrendous investigation. I was sent to Coventry by the District Planners and one even threatened to punch my lights out in a formal meeting because I would not discuss why I felt uncomfortable at work. This meeting was not the forum so I refused to discuss it. I then asked him and another officer three times, to attend mediation so that we could sort out our differences. They refused by claiming there was nothing to discuss. I was pushed into a corner by then and had either to back down or go for the bullying and harrassment procedure. I went for this as the threatening behaviour was the last straw. In the end all the planners ganged up on me and told the investigator that I was not threatened. They then made a counter allegation stating that I was staring at the walls in the office for long periods. I was running an IT business at work and was staring at women in the street. This was humiliating and grossly untrue. Sadly, the investigator ruled in there favour as I was grossly outnumbered by the others that I implicated. I am now being further investigated regarding my ability to carry out my job and also whether I am running an IT business from work plus a few other things.
I am at my wits end with it all and have been advised by my GP, Occupational Health Doctor and my councellor to stay away from work. I did as they said but now I am on half pay. This has aded to my concern. I live alongside the A1 motorway and the HGV's are looking the quick way out!!
This local authority have ruined the stability I had on joining them, particularly the district planners. They were complete bastards and have little regard for my welfare. My union rep is keeping his head down as I am seeking legal advice. I just can't get him to respond. Is no one in this damned organisation bothered.
Ripping my hair out....tired ....depressed....want a way out!!
 
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Dollit

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Well that's one place you want to get out of quickly as is humanly possible. I worked in a similar place and I was sacked because I was bipolar (before the laws were changed) because I refused to work on a project that was against my principles. I was told I was too junior to have principles. Take the time off, treat it as an opportunity to reassess your life and what you really want to do with. And keep away from the road! :hug:
 
Fedup

Fedup

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Take the time off, treat it as an opportunity to reassess your life and what you really want to do with. And keep away from the road! :hug:

I totally agree with this .
Takcare now :hug:
 
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