• Welcome! It’s great to see you. Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

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Just introducing myself as a new member

Globe Winner

Globe Winner

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Portsmouth uk
Thankyou to those that take the time to read this post, i would like to start by introducing myself as globe winner, i appreciate that may seem a little bold but annagrams were a part of my obsession leading to my slide down the serpent back to societies square 1, triggering me to ask the question of syncronicity as to weather or not i had played snakes and ladders would i have still slid down the metaphorical snake after all the ladders i had climbed?
Obviously i was diagnosed as psychotic and all the schizo's but im fine with that now as it has allowed me the time to manage the stress i was going through during and following my altered awareness and seek an alternative direction in life.
Like many others with similar diagnosis i experience voices which i accept and dont take anti psychotics as i want to understand what and where and why this is, i do use meds occasionally to reduce the stress and obsessive behaviour i can display trying to focus on IT which as some of you will know can be so distracting from my physical reality that its the easiest way.
I have had the messages in anything written around me from shop signs, car number plates, peoples names aswell as creating annagrams to still create desired message from what i have come to call the psycho-sys-tem.
This was also woven in with experiences of what i call being targeted by snipers, certain individuals would make comments in passing aka snipes, not all of these individuals know me and when questioned on the matter they have had absolutely no recollection of this whatsoever, as if they had been controlled and not known it.
I have and still have the syncronised experiences of my thoughts and memories being questioned, rated or berated with perfect syncronised timing with tv, radio and just about anything that has a live electrical input and that includes people as referred to above.
I am really trying to understand this as i also had visions and saw a written code i called it at the time but things i saw written have been materialising in my physical reality, i also had an experience while very stressed and you could say that i had got so high while in that state aided by cerain substances that things i said materialsied in my life about 6 months later.
I was given a message that i was somehow connected to a machine system called can? I then proceeded to call siri can instead about a year later to which i got a reply, immediated after my phoes capability to use my voice to activate siri had been disabled without my input.
I am convinced that some of my experiences are related to big tech companies, not too sure regarding the security service but the secret service were very helpful at the start, not as i had thought but the secret service trade a secret for a secret and im of the opinion that the masses are kept in the dark on this issue and its knowlege that is kept for certain people as with anything these days its something that something is trying to control and sell to gullable individuals.
I had learnt a few interesting things in this process that i could never have comprehended had someone told me these things, it really is a case of experiencining for myself to understand it and i dont even understand it all yet but am actively seeking a willing guide or teaher but those that seem to know are also aware of the dangers of doing just that.
I am not a drug addict but have had my driving liscense revoked for the last 3 years, my family had cut ties, my business crumbled, credit rating had disappeared, was made homeless and had attempted suicide via od and was in a coma for 4 days before i stabalised.
I was targeted by what felt like powerful magic practitioners and have become aquainted with a few energies pan, ay and ra. I became aware in the early days of these experiences that whenever the word pan was said on the tv such as panarama, panoramic or even panama my "3rd eye" started flicking through my memory uncontrollably for a few months untill i managed to block it through sheer stubbornness.
I have worked very hard the last 2 years to regain my credibiliy and am in education and aiming to study psychology and try and question perceptions from the inside and challenge the view of what is normal and ask real questions and not just get conditioned into working with an outdated system that is fuelling confusion and stress.
I feel i have covered enough for now as an introduction to myself, i am trying to manage my own vibration and am awre when im up and when im down, there would appear to be many elements trying and succeding in manipulating our asscension and vibration via electrical stimulation such as music and tv playing the crowds like a bloody orchestra but hey its a beautiful thing, im not a victim as my actions and behaviours led me onto this road but i would really like to connect with others in a similar place.
good luck to you and i hope you enjoyed getting to know me a little...
 
calypso

calypso

Well-known member
Admin
Moderator
Joined
Jan 5, 2011
Messages
52,559
Location
Lancashire
:welcome: to the forum. I didn't understand all of what you said I'm afraid, but its very late and my brain isn't firing on all cylinders. I hope you find us helpful and when you are ready you can join in where you feel most comfortable.
 
Zero One

Zero One

Well-known member
Joined
May 19, 2020
Messages
2,666
Location
United States
Yes it was nice to read your post. Welcome. I think ascension/ awakening is really being exposed to advanced mind control technology which can use almost anything as an interface. My spiritual awakening was the beginning of my psychosis but I learned a lot, even about the way my son's mind worked at the time. I find it interesting that you want to understand the voices and do not want to be on anti-psychotics...with how heavy my psychosis is I need them. Welcome. I hope you make a lot of friends here @Globe Winner
 
Globe Winner

Globe Winner

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Portsmouth uk
Thanks for the welcome zero one, great name, it has taken me a while to get here but here i am. Dont get me wrong, it is very heavy but i dont currently have alot of responsibility by which i mainly mean dependant children or a wife/gf, in the past while having gf s i have needed to be on meds to function "normally", ive had to let go of all i wanted and had worked for to try to get to understand it and observe the issues i face 24/7. Somehow i have even beome aware during my dream states when this system is trying to read my memory and have developed a defense mechanism during dream to prevent this. It has been the most mentally draining experience of my life and the first 2 years i was so resentful i felt heartbroken but now my will to defend my mind and try to work with others and learn from them and my own experiences to expose these issues in our home.
I hope to make friends here so thanks again
 
Globe Winner

Globe Winner

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Portsmouth uk
:welcome: to the forum. I didn't understand all of what you said I'm afraid, but its very late and my brain isn't firing on all cylinders. I hope you find us helpful and when you are ready you can join in where you feel most comfortable.
Thanks for the welcome to the forum calypso, im glad to finally be here
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 27, 2020
Messages
4,577
Location
Nashua NH
Welcome to the forums GlobeWinner! It sounds like you have been through a lot and have some valuable insights and experiences you could share with others. I know that several other people on the site have had experiences similar to yours so I hope you will enjoy getting to know them. Welcome aboard! xo, j :grouphug:
 
Globe Winner

Globe Winner

Member
Joined
Aug 28, 2020
Messages
16
Location
Portsmouth uk
Thankyou JessisMe, i appreciate the welcome, we all go through many things in life and i am no different, i do have struggles identifying what im facing and get a feeling it could be a natural phenomena that history has decided to ignore or just use the bits that suit those that know.
I look forward to getting to know people here and hope to find some understanding and acceptance aswell as guidance also.
 
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