Just been accepted to a minimum stay of 12 weeks maybe longer if needed

[sadpunchingbag]

going to post about the shit i have today got the social worker coming so lets see how that goes and gotta see foot doctor to see if they need to do surgery on toes if not then happy days

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Just woke up! Had a intense day id say much more that Yesturday today i saw the long awaited Social worker. I had to wait till 4 because i needed a psychologist with me incase i went ape shit and throw another chair at someone. But in all honesty it was amazing met another psychologist that i would see once every 3 months before i came into hosptial he said you made so much progress. I said i dont feel like that but thank you. When it comes to complimentd it makes my skin crawl something i should discuss in psychology. Maybe i believe i dont deserve them ? Ill update you on thst if i remember next week.

So on lighter notes i had a reflection on myself the progress i made is ok in my eyes but i want much more i can compile a list why not? I think its best i just have it i dont believe in all that jinx bs but sorta feel it. When i do something on my list i will say that is another thint off my list.

Saw the advocate had a list of problems i have her on the case. So to give the hospital and head doctor to do something i am not going to settle for shit help in terms of a solution ya feel me?

But i will talk about a convosation i had with another patient a really cool dude he is comming out for more meals because thet other patient that is beint a dick to us i told him i will through another chair to assert my alpha dominence. Jk but being serious in a joking way i will if i am tilted. So anyway he spoke about the activities he does which is pottery and drama play reading and acting i felt really unconfortable but this is a a massive step forward going to a group with people id consider normal no people with middle to intense autism i dont get much out sure i will say high and give as much conversation as they want but i need also someone more on my lv which the other patient on this ward is so its cool i told him i would give it a go also.

Asked him if any cute girls he said yes so that is another incentive to go lol. But as for that not much my wisdom tooth is coming in so hurtint like a mother fucker but i said ill give it another day or 2 if not then go to dentist to see its ite

One last still have not gone out with therapis to gym sorta pissing me off entitle to 1 hour 4 days a week been about 8 days the lady is leaving but you know that is not my problem but i will go on my own fuck it another challenye right ? It presentd itself so lets see how i goes right dudes ?

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Today was a sad day the OT i have been with every day with for 1 hour a day mon to friday left got to say bye to her. Bought her a keychain which is a occupational therapy one with a tree on it. she also met my mum before she went after my visit i went into my room and cried for about 1 hour or so. One of those things people come and go but the memories are forever but you still dont want them to leave but she will be always a part of my recovery which i am eternally grateful for. Now for something less depressing i went on the longest walk i have ever been on so i pushed it which was good will do it again tomorrow because i enjoy the pain a bit. To me that is me pushing my boundaries.

We had a sports day thing did some of the stuff because why not sorta boring but being around people is something i gotta force myself to do just to feel more like a normal person. That is pretty much it lastly i am intending on trying pottery with another patient just have to wait for referral and maybe drama if i am not that scared i never did drama is school just could not do it so that will be a fucking challenge but LETS GO ya hur me !!!!!!!!!!

day was 6 out of 10 due to me misses 6 things i wanted to do everyday but improvements

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Just thought id give a little update on today so we had a BBQ for the sports week we did activities on monday to thursday 8 in total very good i missed 2 due to appointments but never the less it was really good. I was naughty i had a ice cream but i mean i had nothing in 7 weeks so its only for me in moderation when there is something to celebrate it was a good time. Also had portion controlled chips and 1 burger you can have much more if you wanted but i am not. I went to the shop bought a load of fizzy drinks chocolate and crisps for everyone sort of in a sadistic way while everyone puts on weight i am losing it . Also the walk i went on was 2 hours so long as fuck and was hot as fuck boi. Bought one of the doctors some chocolates and a card as he is leaving so i thought why not he has been a massive support and someone i can trust wanted to show him i appreciate him for all he has done for me. Not sure if i have to get a certificate dont really want to get it but why not ill update you all later

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Got some quite annoy news i have just spent the last 4 hours writing bullet points on stuff i am going to bring up and ward round it is utterly disgusting how i am being treated i have had it i am going to unleash the beast a LOT of SHIT is going to change this upcoming tuesday is going to stressful just thought id let you all know i might get kicked out if this continues but i will give it my all on tuesday i am not going to be nice to those cunts in the room may take a break this weekend maybe not

 

[Lunar Lady]

Got some quite annoy news i have just spent the last 4 hours writing bullet points on stuff i am going to bring up and ward round it is utterly disgusting how i am being treated i have had it i am going to unleash the beast a LOT of SHIT is going to change this upcoming tuesday is going to stressful just thought id let you all know i might get kicked out if this continues but i will give it my all on tuesday i am not going to be nice to those cunts in the room may take a break this weekend maybe not

Are you okay, Punch?

Doesn't sound good...

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Are you okay, Punch?

Doesn't sound good...

No just in terms of negligence care and not solving problems in a timely manner sort of gonna lose my shit in next ward round which is this tuesday i have written everything i need to say in a tone that does not scream walk over me i was up until 5 am writing it then from 4 am to 5 am tried getting i slep with pain trom feet more specifically left toe nail i most likely need surgery for it also wisdom tooth wants to come through i feel like my breath smells but i brush 2 times a day floss and mouth wash in the morning apparently its when the th gum swells food gete trapped in it

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Just did my saturday weigh in considering i had a full english breakfast obviously calorie controlled and 1 litre of water i lost 1.4 kg which is just over 3 pound i am not happy with this i want min of 3.5 pound a week now i can say well i had 1 litre of water but that is not good enough i clearly did not work as hard as i should this is a disappointment i will go harder from today to next saturday i will try crush my weight loss i will go on the long woods walk combined with the small one but i may add another bit to it so weigh in was disappointing

 

[Lunar Lady]

Just did my saturday weigh in considering i had a full english breakfast obviously calorie controlled and 1 litre of water i lost 1.4 kg which is just over 3 pound i am not happy with this i want min of 3.5 pound a week now i can say well i had 1 litre of water but that is not good enough i clearly did not work as hard as i should this is a disappointment i will go harder from today to next saturday i will try crush my weight loss i will go on the long woods walk combined with the small one but i may add another bit to it so weigh in was disappointing

But you'd be happy losing 8lbs over a fortnight, right?

The body very often loses the desired amount of weight but not within the seven day segments that we demand. This is not a refection of what you're doing - just how it is. Some people drop a steady level of pounds each week - others go three weeks with barely any reduction and then suddenly drop the weight.

You've lost 3lbs - that's great.

Enjoy your successes - too hard on yourself, Punch. x

 

[sadpunchingbag]

But you'd be happy losing 8lbs over a fortnight, right?

The body very often loses the desired amount of weight but not within the seven day segments that we demand. This is not a refection of what you're doing - just how it is. Some people drop a steady level of pounds each week - others go three weeks with barely any reduction and then suddenly drop the weight.

You've lost 3lbs - that's great.

Enjoy your successes - too hard on yourself, Punch. x

Thanks Lunar i just have this desire and way i operate i love to torture and put myself through long sessions of exercise either cardio or weightlifting i clearly didnt go out 2 out of 7 days which is why i didnt lose that last 1 pound i will make up next week going to aim for 5 pound also i am putting on muscle as well i have to consider but my base line goal is to lose 1 stone every 28 days which is 14 pounds i did not try my hardest this will change i am pathetic poor excuse of a human

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Just thought id show some pics from my 2 hour walk not trying to brag just proud

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Today did not go off to a good start woke up at 6am went back to sleep like 3 times had nightmares i cant wake up from some deep shit fucking with my subconsious so anyway had breakfast oatmeal and banana not a fan of the banana i bought seems like someone stuck it up the shitter anyway

Had shower got changed child on internet fell asleep for 1 hour had another nightmare woke up for lunch had lunch was in a aggressive bad mood trying not to lose my shit so i listen to music if i have another problem with the patient the nurses started asking if i am ok i tell them how i feel said no really pissed off hes x y z reason i assume they will write notes on every interaction you have with them

So anyway went back to bed had 3 more nightmares woke up to someone saying dinner time had dinner went back to room read a book and wrote notes on it so a good thint 1 more thint in the day then went out at 6.40pm to 8.50pm so a 2 hour walk i did not stop dont underestimate yourself you have it in you i had a massive body high the day before my assumption on what i could handle was much lower physically for cardio my biggest take away is listen to music get into a rythem and a pase then just go until the wheels fall off my nipples was so hard you could of poked someones eyes out i am now waitint for meds and will do the generic get ready for bed then try sleep also i rang a gym the price was disgustingly overpriced but i most likely will just to get out and to get them gains and use it as a form or therapy added with the services here today was meh id give it a 5.5 out of 10 still not statting maths revision or poler but started reading so only 2 more things to go and a few tiny things that will come i just need to be conscious and tell myself to do them night all tell me how you been x

 

[goodgollymiss]

I have a mushroom book that I use to identify mushrooms. Sometimes I go to mushroom expert. The site asks you questions about the mushrooms.
Key to Stemmed, Pale-Fleshed Polypores (MushroomExpert.Com)

 

[goodgollymiss]

Not sure if I gave you the right type of mushroom page

 

[sadpunchingbag]

I have a mushroom book that I use to identify mushrooms. Sometimes I go to mushroom expert. The site asks you questions about the mushrooms.
Key to Stemmed, Pale-Fleshed Polypores (MushroomExpert.Com)

Thank you very much ill give it a look quite a load of different mushrooms around depending if they have a little fog early in the morning

 

[goodgollymiss]

Your medications could be given you dry mouth. You may need to use a glycerin mouth wash after meals (biotene) and gently brush after anything sugar. Some people brush with water after eating something. You may not have enough saliva

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Your medications could be given you dry mouth. You may need to use a glycerin mouth wash after meals (biotene) and gently brush after anything sugar. Some people brush with water after eating something. You may not have enough saliva

Mm i will bring this up ty my dude

 

[sadpunchingbag]

this is for yesterday was not as bad as my past day spoke to the team leader said i wanted every word at ward round to he recorded and for my advocate and social worker to be present as i feel the head doctor i have no belief in hes ability to solve simple problems so tomorrow will be fun

Now onto my day didnt do much had a foot doctor appointment he ripped a part of my left toe nail to correct it the right one healed fine just the left one is son of a gun went for a walk walked around the long route 2 times was aiming for 3 i forgot to bring water this is purely my fault but it would of helped thats about it tomorrow i have ward round a psych session and a going to a gym to set up membership this should be fun also i finished writing notes on the book i was reading i will start a new one today hopefully this can be a habit only a few more things to do

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Going to post early just because feeling low and stressed the fuck out. Had ward round it was stupid as fuck there solution to the problem is to move me to the otherside of the ward which is much louder due to a door always being in use to change from one building to another the ligjts are much brighter the toilets are never clean it pisses me the fuck off he is the problem yet they move the victim when it will have no effect on the problem i said another patient who moved still has the problems so why should i move ? They give some bs answer i cant remember so yep i have to move room to the shit part of thr ward fucking cant stand this patient anyway i am forced to move will speak to advocate but was not in today so tommorrow i will try again

On brighter notes went to gym on bus with a ot nearly crapped myself though this anxiety really controlls my life also had a psych session really deep shit brought up some pain also feet really acting up like sooooo much pain and my pelvis sockets keep popping still waiting to see a doc after 16 days all these problems are building up not to mention my nightmares from codeine i am deeing a physio person on friday but waited 8 fucking weeks in a hospital

Also not going on a walk my ass would just explode randomly and feet are at the worst i just want to crawl up in a ball and die also didnt do a things eg read when i started 2 days ago and revising poker and abacus fucking hell i am going to explode will prob brush teeth get ready for bed get pain killers then sleep try forget today

 

[sadpunchingbag]

Just had to do i presume some test to see if i am a psychopath to see if i lie on a spectrum the questions are sort of identical to what i did online on a older test apparently its about personality traits to see how i score but i know my answers are going to say i am a narcissist