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Just been accepted to a minimum stay of 12 weeks maybe longer if needed

sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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May 29, 2019
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London
what a weird day so i stayed up all last night i just could not get to sleep a lot of shit going on mentally in a bad spot right now. I forced myself to go to the gym left the hospital at 5am took me 2hours to walk to the gym this is just because i am obese,fat,disgusting,slob but i am changing that. So i walked in had a sort of introduction was told to come back tomorrow for the full one. So that is the plan tomorrow. Also i will go for a walk after dinner like how i used to 1 week ago it will be hard but i gotta throw myself back in the deep end. Also i started revising so its coming together now its just consistency which i think will be easier the more weight i lose so i dont feel like my body is weighing me down when the world is already doing that. So 1 less thing to worry about cant be bad right? I miss everyone commenting i must be getting boring LOL anyone much love people :hug:
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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Today was a extremely odd day. Not sure if it was just because of the sequence of events i did ? Maybe not i was not intending on going to the gym but i forgot about a dentist appointment if i would of missed it i would of needed to wait another 2 weeks then another 2 weeks for treatment for a small filling that could of been slightly worse. So i guess i made a better choice. On the pat dog walk i spoke to the new OT students i still get the feeling they are anxious about starting in a new ward but i had a good repore with student but still not the same like the last 2 OTs i was assigned with but i assume in good time it will be the same. I had plans going to the gym after but i just have not had the energy after those 2 walks i need to be strategic in how i use my stamina its sad but its currently the reality i am extremely unfit but getting better it will get better with time so i can do more etc therefore making me lose weight.

Getting weighed tommorrow i have a bad feeling i put on weight but we will see. Also did not revise or study so not the best day id give the day a 3 out of 10 also dealing with a lot of shit and demons i do have a appointment on monday to get my tattoo started again so that is exiting right ? for me anyway it is i started it years ago 3 to be exact then stopped due to mental health nosedive but i guess getting it done is a show of progress right ? maybe or i am just full of shit it has some meaning to me i feel when it will be done not in the way i intended but like life things come out differently then what we thought it would be right ? goodnight all it can only get better i hope x
 
G

goodgollymiss

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Apr 6, 2017
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408
What beautiful writing. Found a good book about mental health called "voluntary madness" it's about a journalist who pretended to be sick to get into a psych ward for a year. She makes friends and develops the characters of those around her. Sometimes there are good magazine entries about being sectioned online
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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Joined
May 29, 2019
Messages
1,402
Location
London
What beautiful writing. Found a good book about mental health called "voluntary madness" it's about a journalist who pretended to be sick to get into a psych ward for a year. She makes friends and develops the characters of those around her. Sometimes there are good magazine entries about being sectioned online
I think i watched a movie on that or something like that i am not a reader unless i am extremely interested in something maybe ill read it
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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Just gonna give a quick update got weighed lost 1.5 pound quite bad i know why i have not been losing at the rate i was previously losing i will get back on it also i didnt shit before the weigh in so if say 2 pound weight loss i yearned a big turd but i wont accont for that
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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May 29, 2019
Messages
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Location
London
Just gonna give a quick update got weighed lost 1.5 pound quite bad i know why i have not been losing at the rate i was previously losing i will get back on it also i didnt shit before the weigh in so if say 2 pound weight loss i yearned a big turd but i wont accont for that
The solution to my problem of not losing enough weight is easy all i need to do is follow these steps for a week in no order:

1 ) eat oatmeal and a banana for breakfast each day even saturday
2 ) just have a sandwich for lunch with a apple
3 ) have what is provided at the hospital for dinner but do 2 things 1 is ask for a small portion 2 is dont finish the plate
4 ) just drink water exclusively
5 ) go to the local gym tuesday,thursday,saturday,sunday
6) use the gym at the hospital monday, wednesday, friday for cardio equipment exclusively
7 ) go out for a walk everyday to clear head 1 hour minimum of walking
8 ) dont have supper at night
9 ) allow 1 cheat meal on sunday which will be a mac d medium 6 nugget meal with a diet coke if i lose the weight i expect to lose for that week which will be 3.5 pounds

Thats it may seem a lot but thats what have done so far i just need to restate it for myself to go back to i am sure a similar post like this is pages ago so this is easier and quicker to find
 
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goodgollymiss

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Apr 6, 2017
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I love the mcdonalds filet o fish
 
J

Jules5

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Jan 27, 2019
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Location
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I see so much progress. I am so proud of you sticking in there when things get tough. Sorry about losing people you liked to be around. Will you walk to the gym? How far is it 2 miles? Wo that would be a plus. I had blood work done once and everything was out of whack I started walking a few miles a day and next blood work was perfect. Walking is good. I live out in the country no sidewalks or paths to walk down so I use this a my excuse. I see an elderly lady walking every morning she is trim and in shape she also uses a cane lol. Glad you are well and keep on posting. Love and hugs Jules
 
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goodgollymiss

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Apr 6, 2017
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It has tartar sauce and cheese. The tartar sauce may be mayo and relish
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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May 29, 2019
Messages
1,402
Location
London
I see so much progress. I am so proud of you sticking in there when things get tough. Sorry about losing people you liked to be around. Will you walk to the gym? How far is it 2 miles? Wo that would be a plus. I had blood work done once and everything was out of whack I started walking a few miles a day and next blood work was perfect. Walking is good. I live out in the country no sidewalks or paths to walk down so I use this a my excuse. I see an elderly lady walking every morning she is trim and in shape she also uses a cane lol. Glad you are well and keep on posting. Love and hugs Jules
Its actually so underated how walking is its so good for burning fat i went for a walk today around the woods it was nice there was a sort of rave i could of walked passed but i didnt want to get bottled best just to avoid trouble but who knows it may of been a nice experience. I believe the walk is 3.5 miles there and back
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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Messages
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Location
London
Today was a bit of a sleeper day i was going to go out earlier. I didnt due to not having any clothes that is my fault i need to buy some more also 1 pair of shorts i cant keep up which is a good thing. But also bad when your dick is on show. Went on a stroll around the woods i would of liked to wall around the woods fully but a rave/party was going on i would of liked to check it out but being around people similiar to my age in groups is a massive fear for me but atleast i know that. Now something can talk in psychology about or not i will in a later post talk about how i feel its been a waste of time the psychology here so far but i wont go off on a tangent. Also went to the shop got some junk food which i am trying to do it just once a week so i dont crave it so hard i purge i didnt finish what i boutht and will give it away to anothe patient so i dont eat it. Finding balance is the hardest part of life in my experience but it should come around. Got a few plans tommorrow and for monday going to aim to lose 6 pound next week i am going to enjoy the challenge again coming out of a dark spell from the last 2 weeks peace people also let me know how you are all doing xxx
 
sadpunchingbag

sadpunchingbag

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Joined
May 29, 2019
Messages
1,402
Location
London
Today was a massive step forward for me so let me first of by saying. I could not go outside over 12 weeks ago i stayed in my room for 1 year
  1. i could not walk longer that 2 mins
  2. my anxiety was so bad i would shit myself (sorry for being blunt)
  3. the environment was too overstimulating from not seeing much movement when i was in my room for 1 year
  4. did not use a bus in 5 years
  5. did not use a train in 5 years
  6. did not go to a shop for over 1 year
And a few other things. But i will leave it there so today i went out to get my tattoo done which was a goal more so because of using public transport not shitting myself etc having the stamina to travel that far. Also being out that long i was out for 8 hours which is the longest i have ever been in 5 years so i actually am proud. Not to mention getting tattooed for 4 hours the pain and my anxiety etc. It was a journey i spoke to the artists there had a lovely convo just talking about me in hospital i opened up just because i prefer to be honest for something this big they was both lovely so understanding. I wish i had people like that in my life but it can happen you should gotta find like minded people on your lv. Dont settle for people who are not worthy of your time. also i went shopping for clothes. Not much just general stuff and came back on a busy bus which i cant stand being close to people.

so Conclusion it was huge step forward i also reflected while i was getting tattooed about what experiences had done to me how i felt but never had to the words to articulate it i was so young but i wont rant in absolution it was thumbs up for me

I will end of here with the positive post but i could add a lot of bad stuff happening on the ward from ward staff eg psychology/OT and general nurses and the consultant but today was good i wont let it ruin my mood Love you all please comment/ tell me how you all are
 
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