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I've just had a breakdown an can't cope

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Pudpud

New member
Joined
Feb 10, 2015
Messages
2
I was a carer for my mum for 10 years she went into a home last year an died this January .i devoted myself to her even after being raped I just got dressed an saw to her needs never told anyone .at her funeral some people from the stables where I keep my horses turned up an caused trouble an were abusive to me .this finally broke me .i can't grieve I'm frightened to go out I'm scared of all people .cant eat don't want to wake up .if anything happens I fall to bits I used to fight like crazy to protect my mum chasing the drs to get her sorted force to be rekoned with .now won't go out of house help me please cope I can't go on like this thank you
 
SarahD

SarahD

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 21, 2014
Messages
2,095
Location
UK
Hello pudpud, I am so sorry to hear your story. I also cared for my mum for 12 years before she died, and for the last few years we went through a nightmare time. Then when my mum died I fell apart and haven't been able to be ok since.

I don't know what to advise because nothing has worked for me. But a lot of people do get good help, so be brave and just try, start with your GP and let him/her know how desperate you feel. If you can't yet do that start with some helplines so you can at least talk to people and build up your courage. You may get some good advice and support on here. Sarah x
 
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Pudpud

New member
Joined
Feb 10, 2015
Messages
2
Thank you Sarah I have now got help for now from the crisis team .but it's going to be a long journey .i have good days an bad days .the attitude of some people is very shocking and I find this hard to cope with too so aggressive an almost vicious .these frighten me so much I can't go out of the house .ive tried I get massive panic attacks .being someone who has always been an outdoor person this is killing me .i feel ashamed too thst I am this ill .i should be stronger shouldn't i .but they said it's a miricle that after all I've been through that I'm still here which helps .how do you cope how do you manage can you get any thing like normal life back thank you
 
SarahD

SarahD

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 21, 2014
Messages
2,095
Location
UK
Hi pudpud, I am glad you have the crisis team involved, try to express everything you are going through, because if you play it down they won't realise how seriously you need help.

Losing your Mum is such a big thing, and so very recent for you. You are grieving for her. But also I understand what being a carer is like, especially when it gets hard. You focus everything into what your Mum needs, sometimes I used to think it was almost like living her life, my life just disappeared. Dealing with doctors and everyone in authority on her behalf, sorting out every problem, even when you could barely manage to hold things together. As well as all the practical and physical care needs. And you have been through a lot besides that.

I hope you will get the help you need. Please private message me if you want to for anything.

Sarah xxx
 
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