- Nov 16, 2014
I don't know what to do anymore. There's so many things wrong and I can't fix them. My ex wants to get back together again. It would the forth time in 7 years. I'm afraid we can't change for each other. I'm always gonna be jealous of her. I'm not sure it I can trust her. We've both lied to each other in the past. I know she can go without me. Every time we break up she can move on with her life. She has friends and family to pick her back up. I don't have that. I've turned to drugs every time. I've lost all motivation to better my life. Every time I try to change I get knocked back down. Memories of the past are always there. I don't want to be awake because I don't want to deal with my life anymore. I don't want to sleep because I don't want to wake up from my dreams. I don't think I can stay another year. I'm 23 and feel like I'm 40. I want out. I don't want to hurt or cry anymore. I don't want to hurt her ever again. I just want everyone to be happy.