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it's the end

G

gemma

Guest
in order to stop my family getting hurt, it's the end for me, not much else to say since it seems pointless apart from good luck on your personal journeys.
 
oneday

oneday

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 28, 2010
Messages
5,006
Location
London
i hope you seek someone to talk to, gemma, is there someone you know and trust? Worth a try isn't it? Or contact the Samaritans...

>>Samaritans provides confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day for people who are experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those which could lead to suicide.

Whatever you're going through, whether it's big or small, don't bottle it up. We are here for you if you're worried about something, feel upset or confused, or just want to talk to someone.

We offer our service by telephone, email, letter and face to face in most of our branches.

Samaritans is available to anyone in the UK and Ireland. If you live outside of the UK and Ireland, visit www.befrienders.org to find your nearest helpline.<<

http://www.samaritans.org

Helpline 24/7: 08457 90 90 90

Email:
[email protected]

Or phone NHS Direct or 999 for an ambulance.

Wishing you well.
 
A

Affective

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 5, 2009
Messages
414
in order to stop my family getting hurt, it's the end for me, not much else to say since it seems pointless apart from good luck on your personal journeys.
Gemma please reconsider! Please talk to someone.
 
G

gemma

Guest
i think i was being rash, i can sort this, not that the early intervention team were any use today they said if i said something to them tht might cause me or someone else immediate danger they would have to tell the appropriate people. theres nobody to speak to really thats purely confidential it sucks.

i dont want to die, just dont want my family to either :S
 
A

Affective

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Messages
414
i think i was being rash, i can sort this, not that the early intervention team were any use today they said if i said something to them tht might cause me or someone else immediate danger they would have to tell the appropriate people. theres nobody to speak to really thats purely confidential it sucks.

i dont want to die, just dont want my family to either :S
I am very glad you haven't harmed yourself. I too, am with the Early Intervention team, and I am having problems with them.

Is there a friend you can talk to?
 
S

*Sapphire*

Guest
Why do you think your family will get hurt gemma?

Try to keep yourself safe, it might be worth trying to do something today that you find self soothing. Something that will keep you in the present and might distract you from how you are feeling right now.:hug:
 
G

gemma

Guest
hi no i dont do friends anymore im too antisocial and find them annoying. i think i worry about losing them so by not having any ive got nothing to lose.

the early intervention team are ok, i see two very lovely women 2 times a week but today i only saw one and i bought up 3 issues.

1 being that i am worried im addicted to self harming and all she suggested was i wear an elastic band around my wrist and ping it and that i should find something to distract myself. both valid points but dont help me in the long run.

was also the first time i had properly spoken which she seemed pleased about, i usualy show her my book that i write in, but she was just useless.she did try though but what else can she say. she didnt even help me get more medication which i desperately need. the other lady would have helped me so much more.

hi sapphire: my family will get hurt by me if i dont do something drastic :S ive planned how im going to murder them all down to the smallest detail. i dont want to do it but its like ive been brainwashed i feel like the nastiest person alive.
 
parker

parker

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Mar 15, 2009
Messages
278
Location
Oregon
Have you been doing a journal? sometimes it helps to see things written
 
G

gemma

Guest
i did do but on here i got worried about who was viewing it. and in real life what if someone found it. but ur right, thanks
 
A

Affective

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Joined
Nov 5, 2009
Messages
414
apologies for my dramatising today, was no need for it.
Don't apologize. I can guarantee you everyone here has felt like that before and reacted in a similar manner if not the same.
 
parker

parker

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Mar 15, 2009
Messages
278
Location
Oregon
i did do but on here i got worried about who was viewing it. and in real life what if someone found it.
A while back i looked at my notes from when it all started, it made me even cringe:eek: I was thinking the same thing, i don't want my kids to stumble on these.

i had finally got my story all on paper and shared it with 3 people, out of the three one was a voice hearer, which thought i was even crazier after reading it. The other two were from the psychic defense crowd and they related real well with it. But the reaction from the voice hearer really stuck with me, so i will never be sharing it again.
 
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softwhisper

softwhisper

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Joined
Apr 28, 2010
Messages
57
Location
australia
Hello Gem...

my thoughts are also with you ...
i do hope...you find a little peace... today...
in your turmoils...
our road... to recovery...
can be very bumpy...
and...
the knocks...
leave... mighty bruises...
writing for me...
is a great help...
sometimes i feel...
if...
we put pen to paper...
a clearer pathway...seems to appear...
frustrations...
on paper...
leaves problems... to solutions...
for myself...
i sit....
when this happens...
and...
think...above the written frustration...
then take pen to paper...
and ...
somehow...
i answer the frustration...
my pathway...
then seems...
to be more inviting...
to carry on...
we seem to all here...
have rainy days...weeks...months...
that wash away...pathways...
until...
the sun...comes out...again...
and...
drys...
the tears... away...
gouges...in the path...
are the bumps...
that cause us...
to stumble at times...
when this happens...
it is nice to have a crutch...
perhaps... a nurse ... a doctor... a friend...
or...
maybe Gem...
your friends here...
softwhisper...
 
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