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    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

its getting worse<3

sam999

sam999

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 11, 2020
Messages
73
Location
Canada
it feels like my ed starts to become my whole personality and everytime i try recovery i feel like im fading away. im numb and my bdy literally begs me to stop but i cant. im falling behind on my School work, my work and my social life because everything i care about is loosing weight. stepping on the scale is the highlight of my day and the only Thing i can think About. i literally cant do this anymore
 
Louizard

Louizard

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 29, 2020
Messages
126
Location
Italy
Hi Sam, I know it's annoying but I wanna go with my usual question- are you seeing a therapist to help you out if this? If you are, feel no shame if you would like to change them, we can't be comfortable with everybody.

With that out of the way, I am recovering from an eating disorder (not the same way as yours, but I get the feeling) and I understand that it's just much easier to stay within your comfort zone and keep up your bad habits, such as weighting yourself. The second you're trying to start recovery is just the hardest thing to do, to get out there and actually try.
I have no advice other than please, please force yourself through those times you feel like recovery isn't working. I believe you feel like fading away because you are fading away from the disorder, which you say feels like part of you. That is why you must drift away further away, you are going to feel confused and lost, and it will all be worth it in the end. Recovery is complicated, not linear, but it's what will give you the most satisfaction at the end of the day, even if you can't feel it right away.

Listen to what your body needs, it's trying to keep a wonderful person up and working!
 
sam999

sam999

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 11, 2020
Messages
73
Location
Canada
Hi Sam, I know it's annoying but I wanna go with my usual question- are you seeing a therapist to help you out if this? If you are, feel no shame if you would like to change them, we can't be comfortable with everybody.

With that out of the way, I am recovering from an eating disorder (not the same way as yours, but I get the feeling) and I understand that it's just much easier to stay within your comfort zone and keep up your bad habits, such as weighting yourself. The second you're trying to start recovery is just the hardest thing to do, to get out there and actually try.
I have no advice other than please, please force yourself through those times you feel like recovery isn't working. I believe you feel like fading away because you are fading away from the disorder, which you say feels like part of you. That is why you must drift away further away, you are going to feel confused and lost, and it will all be worth it in the end. Recovery is complicated, not linear, but it's what will give you the most satisfaction at the end of the day, even if you can't feel it right away.

Listen to what your body needs, it's trying to keep a wonderful person up and working!
i used to go to a therapist but i dont go there anymore. and thank you so much i really appreciate your effort of writing this. thank you<3
 
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