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It's been really difficult lately, can someone give me some good advice.

W

whosebob

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 13, 2013
Messages
45
It's been really difficult lately, can someone give me some good advice.

Recently the voices have been trying a new approach. They reminding of everything I don't have. I have so much to be thankful for yet I can't stop thinking about having my own kids. I know some people still get married that have schizophrenia but I can't do that. I also walk around like I am under someone elses control and I also have this personality that uses my body that insults me with my own body. It's really difficult because I also feel really numb. My emotions are gone. To make things worst I also have to fight for my faith because I think terrible about God which really effect me. I show a good face to my family because I don't want them to worry but I feel so bad that evens my body hurts. I try doing things to occupy my time with but it's very difficult. I try praying but I feel like God does'nt evens take the time to look at me. Prayer is suppose to be peaceful place but I feel terrible because I see things smiling and mocking me in my prayers. I try to read scripture but I can't evens do that anymore because I hear someone elses terrible voice reading my thoughts...I tried for years but now I am getting really sick of it. All I can do is hope that God somehow reads for me because I just scan through the scripture with my finger hoping that He reads for me. I am also really struggling with my family because of my thoughts about my own religion. I try so hard to fit in but I can't. What must they think of me if they knew my thoughts about my own faith. I just hope one day they forgive me. The only thing that really helps me is music. I just hope it does'nt get spoilt because it really does help me. I also struggle because they know I long to get married and they use that against me. I fall for it everytime and I don't now how to fight it. I also recently felt like my perspective is changing, it's like I see things in a sick way which is so repulsive I feel sick. I don't know what to do. Is there medication I can take... I am on clopromazine. I rather be sedated than seeing these horrible things. I also don't sleep well. I try resting when I feel terrible but I can't sleep. I also feel anxiety about religion mostly... it's like a weight is put on me and I feel really stressed. It goes on for a long time. Is there something for anxiety that works. I have tried chamomile tea but it does'nt work. I have evens thought of doing drugs and drinking alcohol to calm myself down or anything to help me get some peace. I also feel really hollow and cold like there is no heat in my body, my heart also feel like something horrible is around it.

If you have any advice, please help. Because I don't know what to do anymore?

Thanks for your time.
 
C

colin13502

Guest
Recently the voices have been trying a new approach. They reminding of everything I don't have. I have so much to be thankful for yet I can't stop thinking about having my own kids. I know some people still get married that have schizophrenia but I can't do that. I also walk around like I am under someone elses control and I also have this personality that uses my body that insults me with my own body. It's really difficult because I also feel really numb. My emotions are gone. To make things worst I also have to fight for my faith because I think terrible about God which really effect me. I show a good face to my family because I don't want them to worry but I feel so bad that evens my body hurts. I try doing things to occupy my time with but it's very difficult. I try praying but I feel like God does'nt evens take the time to look at me. Prayer is suppose to be peaceful place but I feel terrible because I see things smiling and mocking me in my prayers. I try to read scripture but I can't evens do that anymore because I hear someone elses terrible voice reading my thoughts...I tried for years but now I am getting really sick of it. All I can do is hope that God somehow reads for me because I just scan through the scripture with my finger hoping that He reads for me. I am also really struggling with my family because of my thoughts about my own religion. I try so hard to fit in but I can't. What must they think of me if they knew my thoughts about my own faith. I just hope one day they forgive me. The only thing that really helps me is music. I just hope it does'nt get spoilt because it really does help me. I also struggle because they know I long to get married and they use that against me. I fall for it everytime and I don't now how to fight it. I also recently felt like my perspective is changing, it's like I see things in a sick way which is so repulsive I feel sick. I don't know what to do. Is there medication I can take... I am on clopromazine. I rather be sedated than seeing these horrible things. I also don't sleep well. I try resting when I feel terrible but I can't sleep. I also feel anxiety about religion mostly... it's like a weight is put on me and I feel really stressed. It goes on for a long time. Is there something for anxiety that works. I have tried chamomile tea but it does'nt work. I have evens thought of doing drugs and drinking alcohol to calm myself down or anything to help me get some peace. I also feel really hollow and cold like there is no heat in my body, my heart also feel like something horrible is around it.

If you have any advice, please help. Because I don't know what to do anymore?

Thanks for your time.
kava kava and l-theanine both work really well for anxiety. you can buy kava root off the web and make a relaxing tea with it. l-theanine is a chemical found in tea leaves, its very relaxing and a study showed that 400mg reduced anxiety and positive symptoms in schizophrenics. these things work way better than chamomile, theyre safe and fda approved as well.
 
D

Deliah

Guest
Hello, I can hear that you're really suffering. I have voices too. I practice mindfulness and dialogue with them and it has changed my life. love D xx
 
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Jamatine

Member
Joined
Mar 25, 2015
Messages
5
I am so sorry to hear about your suffering. Please do not turn to drugs or alcohol. I feel that may worsen your symptoms as I watched it happen to someone I care about. Please use support groups or whatever you can do to fight this. I will pray for you!
 
F

Fantail

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 26, 2015
Messages
52
The confusing thoughts that come with mental health conditions can make you wonder how you truly feel about everything. I have the same problem there.

Having a family I have accepted my condition has made it difficult to achieve. I don't want to pass the condition to a child. I can't look after a child. I sprinkle my love on children in my life.
 
W

whosebob

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 13, 2013
Messages
45
Thanks everybody for your support

Feeling much better now. It's still hard but at least I am coping. Thank you for everyone prayers. It really does help. Going to keep up the fight.

Thanks again everyone.

Peace and blessings be upon you.
 
C

Christobel

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 6, 2014
Messages
1,075
Location
South west
Dear Whosebob - I'm very glad you're feeling better. I am sure you are right about what you say in your post, and that God is reading for you. He knows all about suffering.
 
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