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Q

Quietman5

Member
Joined
Dec 10, 2018
Messages
17
Will there ever come a time when a person stops hating themselves, stops punishing themselves emotionally and physically, stop feeling all alone in a room filled with people you know and like, just to be happy again. Three days ago I was doing ok, raking and baling hay. Saturday hits and I struggle to get off the couch at 1030 AM and go do some necessary shopping. By 1PM I'm so anxious and overwhelmed. I really wanted to SH for many reasons but chose to lay back on the couch and hide from the world? Sunday was eerily similar to Saturday. This evening I relapsed and am paying the price. I am going to bring it up to my therapist on Wednesday and see what her opinion is. how can you run from your own mind?
Thanks for letting me vent.
 
Foxjo

Foxjo

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 2, 2012
Messages
6,868
Location
Teesside
Hi Quietman5
No you cannot ever run from your own mind. Ive tried. Ive tried running and because of that i ended up in so many towns accross the uk. What i didnt realise is that i was running from myself and you just cant.
Im glad you have a therapist and that you are able to talk to her about it. i am a strong believer in talking therapies.
If you want to talk further you can PM me, no worries.
Hugs
Fox
 
TheSadnessWillLastForever

TheSadnessWillLastForever

Member
Joined
Oct 28, 2019
Messages
7
Location
Ohio
Im glad you’re talking about it to a professional, your post hits really close to home for me because I’ve felt like that before and still do sometimes but I want you to know you absolutely will feel better about yourself and your life if you keep working at it. It’s been a long road for me but I have more good days then bad now and it was worth it to finally feel some shred of happiness after being in the dark for so long, so keep fighting because the cood days are coming
 
Q

Quietman5

Member
Joined
Dec 10, 2018
Messages
17
I am finding that the feelings of euphoria + pain after I SH used to last for several days but now it may only last a day or so at most. I guess it can be that addictive that I plan out when the next time I can feel it again. . . This sounds bad ugh. I have ample excuses for punishing myself so the question is how much more often or severe does one need to go IOT feel those feelings again? If I could get away with it every day I would. Does anyone else feel this way?
 
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