Is this depersonalization disorder?

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Shannon27

Active member
Joined
Sep 13, 2017
Messages
25
Location
California
#1
Hello, about 7 months back I had a horrific experience. One night I took one hit of pot and had a very bad trip. The next morning i still felt high. It lasted 41 days. I didnt feel like i had control over my body and my perception was.way off. I had severe brain fog and had a hard time remembering things. I couldn't read, it made my head feel even worse. I was told that I had a cannabis induced psychosis but I looked up psychosis and didn't have the symptoms. Many months later i stumbled upon depersonalization disorder and all the symptoms fit exactly. My psychiatrist says that it wasn't it though. I think he's wrong.

During the episode I went to the ER three times because I didn't know what was going on and I had severe panic attacks. I now live with constant anxiety and my chest burns. It never goes away. I tried every anxiety med in the book but only benzodiazepines and gabapentin helps. Only the ER gave me a few benzos but my doctors won't prescribe them. So now I take gabapentin and it helps for about half of the day. I can still get panic attacks.

I also have horrific nightmares and I take prazosin for that. I have fewer nightmares now bit I still deal with very vivid dreams. I often try to fight myself to wake up and it's very hard. When I wake up from the vivid dreams I feel that same high disassociation feeling. It is also hard to keep my eyes open and focus. My body feels numb, it's difficult to move. I feel as though I'm still dreaming while I'm awake and moving around. It is a very intense feeling. It lasts usually 1 to 2 hours. Last night I had a bad episode and I keep getting that high feeling every so often. It has been happening a lot more often, about twice a week now. I don't know if it's a form of sleep paralysis or linked to depersonalization. Anyone experience something similar and what is it exactly? I know some of my other mental illness may contribute. I have bipolar disorder, ptsd, generalized anxiety, and apparently a sleep disorder.
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
1,753
Location
USA
#2
That sounds so horrible and scary.I have experienced dissociation before but have not experienced what you have.

I have no clue what it might be but I hope you figure it out soon.

As I stated in another thread of yours,I'm wondering what the weed may have been laced with.
 
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Shannon27

Active member
Joined
Sep 13, 2017
Messages
25
Location
California
#3
I got tests done and it wasn't laced. After 3 days I didn't even have thc in my system. I think maybe the pot triggered something in my brain so I had a bad trip and I disassociated to protect myself. That's my guess anyway.