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Is this abuse? Another rant

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Amethystgrey9999

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Reading all these replies, it kinda feels like I'm exaggerating. I should be fine, I've taken to locking myself up in a room that my mom doesn't have the key to (thank God). Maybe once I get to my dorm, I'll start saving up and I'll flee for real. Thank you for all of the concern, I really appreciate it. Atleast know I know it's not because I'm a brat and a lazy person, it's definitely atleast 60% on how my mom was raised.
 
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Amethystgrey9999

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Unfortunately, this is more common in third world countries and developing countries. My guess is that with the availability of the internet and television, people's intelligence and awareness is increasing, which in the future will help to avoid cases like mine. Unless you intend to live as a hermit, you will take care of someone anyway. But it's nice to let you have a family.
I sure do hope, I don't become a hermit.
 
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toto

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Sorry for the clumsy (bad) English. I wanted to say that your mother should allow you to have a family of her own, instead of requiring you to take care of her. If you live for her, you will make a crisis, maybe like me. I made compromises in the past out of love and ended up with psychosis. Take care of yourself. Talking to her about what the authorities think seems to me to be the best solution.
 
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toto

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For laziness ... someone here said it was crazy to want to work :D . Today's generation is more looking for rights and rest, that's what I give it to. With this non-violence against children, until recently my children sent me to bring them water instead of getting up on their own (until I felt that they were acting on me). I'm not sure about escape, but if I could go back in time I would have come to Germany earlier, I would have been looking for a really intelligent and nice man.
 
A

Amethystgrey9999

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Sorry for the clumsy (bad) English. I wanted to say that your mother should allow you to have a family of her own, instead of requiring you to take care of her. If you live for her, you will make a crisis, maybe like me. I made compromises in the past out of love and ended up with psychosis. Take care of yourself. Talking to her about what the authorities think seems to me to be the best solution.
I'm sorry about your situation, I hope you're in a better place right now. I told her about me possibly having adhd, and so I might see a psychiatrist. Maybe that'll be a way for things to get better, but she thinks that the psychiatrist might say that I have adhd to get more money, etc. It definitely stopped me from telling her about me possible being on the spectrum for autism (because of the stigma).
 
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toto

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Instead of moving out, I moved in with my friend and his family (my current husband). I made this decision so as not to offend the relatives I lived with because I was afraid they would get angry, and I did not like life there. And so I killed my initiative. I don't know if to run, but it's certainly good for you to move out.
 
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Amethystgrey9999

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For laziness ... someone here said it was crazy to want to work :D . Today's generation is more looking for rights and rest, that's what I give it to. With this non-violence against children, until recently my children sent me to bring them water instead of getting up on their own (until I felt that they were acting on me). I'm not sure about escape, but if I could go back in time I would have come to Germany earlier, I would have been looking for a really intelligent and nice man.
Ah well, there's some truth to it. Oof children, I'll leave it at that.
 
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toto

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Well, it's still crazy. But you're young and you can change. What does it matter if you are autistic since it is clear what caused your autism and the treatment is psychotherapy, overcoming these relationships, more passion for life, new job ... as far as cleaning ... it is very important to make your home comfortable to clean , to have a regime of when to clean (distributed in the week). These are things you will learn if you are alone.
 
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Amethystgrey9999

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Instead of moving out, I moved in with my friend and his family (my current husband). I made this decision so as not to offend the relatives I lived with because I was afraid they would get angry, and I did not like life there. And so I killed my initiative. I don't know if to run, but it's certainly good for you to move out.
Family is so tricky at this point. I'll keep your advices in mind. Thank you :hug:
 
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toto

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Besides, you're not exaggerating. An intelligent person will not feel the need to behave like that with a child, considering himself a funny person. As far as fighting over a child ... I would recommend everyone to have children first and then talk about how to behave with a child. Not that fighting is a solution, but honestly, my mother is beaten every day and works like a horse, has a passion for life, and I'm like a mollusk. Maybe emotional abuse is worse than beating up a child. But after a certain age it is inadequate to reach out to someone.
 
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toto

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I'm glad that with my conclusions about this situation, I can help someone not to put their parent in prison just because he's a little stupid as a parent. :)
 
A

Amethystgrey9999

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I'm glad that with my conclusions about this situation, I can help someone not to put their parent in prison just because he's a little stupid as a parent. :)
This made me laugh. Thank you, it's been a while.
 
A

Amethystgrey9999

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Besides, you're not exaggerating. An intelligent person will not feel the need to behave like that with a child, considering himself a funny person. As far as fighting over a child ... I would recommend everyone to have children first and then talk about how to behave with a child. Not that fighting is a solution, but honestly, my mother is beaten every day and works like a horse, has a passion for life, and I'm like a mollusk. Maybe emotional abuse is worse than beating up a child. But after a certain age it is inadequate to reach out to someone.
All things considered my mom is a bit physically abusive. My mom has entered my room twice this year hitting me till I woke because I slept like a pig??? All because the sheets were coming off the corners, till I decided to steal all the copies of the keys. I get chills whenever my mom knocks. But, I agree I don't know what it feels like to have a child, so I can't tell anyone what to do. Your perspective definitely helped me empathize.
 
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Girl interupted

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The biggest issue for most bpd is realizing that what our parents did was not normal and helped to create the disorder.

I still remember that lightbulb moment when I saw a "normal" family and realized mine was not. That leads to it's own form of mourning and grief.

What you describe is not normal. I hope you are working with a therapist to resolve it.

The only way out is through.
 
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toto

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Honestly, I don't know if slapping is harmful or not until a certain age. But this with sexual jokes, even when you are already big and you have developed a character to be attacked, is not normal. You need to get away from it as soon as possible. It is not normal to wake you up with a fight.
 

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