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Is this a personality disorder?

G

Gilypore

New member
Joined
Mar 17, 2021
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4
Location
Manchester
Hi there I am new to this forum, I have always had a concern I have always wondered whether it should be something I should be concerned about or not. I do not know if this is the right place as this is a general query so I'm sorry about that.

When I was about 9 I used to picture myself as an older person who was acting in the shows I liked as an extra, I did this to feel a connection to some of the characters I liked. As I grew older however, I began to talk to that person in my head; like an older version of myself exactly the same just 5 years older, effectively an imaginary friend. I would ask him questions and he would respond as if I asked them him and I gave him a life where I would go about my day and he would go about his. I would have moments where I wouldn't get a response as he would be asleep to me and then I would create a world for him. Effectively I had an imaginary friend who I gave a life to as an actor and grew up taking him into my adult years, still talking to him (im 25).

Now Its never that he has told me to do bad things or anything like that but when I do screenwriting I will take advice from him like he knows and I will respond. In actual fact he is like a moral compass sometimes and he helps me when I'm making the wrong decisions, telling me what is right.

Now I dont know if deep down I want to say he is not real because he kept me company as a child and was like a big brother to me. I've NEVER had a single issue with him and I would feel a bit empty without him. I just like escaping to his world sometimes and I have made and written screenplays with him (i know how that sounds).

I have always wondered is this anything i should be concerned about going forward, I have always feared things like schizophrenia or a personality disorder but maybe deep deep deep down I know it is just me but I feel less alone seeing it as a different version of me giving advice to myself where he and I both live our lives an meet up in the middle somewhere, I used to say that he was like a parallel me who was just a bit older than me. I just have this fear that this is something that I should be worried about but I've NEVER had any issue, I'm just a little scared that I need to see what other people think because I've never told a sole this?
 
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