Is there anyone here formally diagnosed with DID?

G

Goldie43

Member
Joined
Jan 30, 2019
Messages
9
Location
new Zealand
#1
Hi, am looking for people who have been diagnosed with DID formally by psychiatrists. No offence to others intended, I just want to hear from those who have been through the diagnosis and are now living with DID.

Thanks
 
L

LaCarpenteria

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2019
Messages
3
Location
Los Angeles
#2
Hi, am looking for people who have been diagnosed with DID formally by psychiatrists. No offence to others intended, I just want to hear from those who have been through the diagnosis and are now living with DID.

Thanks
Hello, I am new to this forum, I signed up a few days ago. I have been officially diagnosed with DID and PTSD. I was diagnosed in November of 2018, so not too long ago.

I have had a very traumatic past 2 years and started seeing a new therapist for what I we all assumed was solely PTSD due to a horrific car accident I was in in July of 2018, my fathers unexpected death in 2017, a miscarriage in 2017 and witnessing the still birth of my God Son.

I have a history of excessive trauma, abuse and neglect starting at 6 months old, I am now 38. I thought I was experiencing flash backs and having what I called "manic outbursts" do to the recent "major" trauma, but truth be told I have been living with DID almost my entire life but was unaware, I know now that the way I experienced life wasn't/isn't the same as most but I didn't know that. I describe the knowing/being unaware like this:

We al know that a stop sign is red, we know that "STOP" spells stop and we know what that word means. We know all this because it's what we were taught, we never question what people see when they say "red". We don't ask people to describe the shape of the sign or the letters. Our reality is our own and we believe others see and understand the same things we do, it's the basis of communication.

I never asked anyone if they had chunks of time they can't remember, I never asked if anyone could remember something that happened to them but have no emotions attached to that story, I never asked if they see someone else in the mirror sometimes and if they talk to that person out loud, I never asked if they always felt like there life was, at times, a movie that they were watching and they had no connection to the person or events they were seeing. Why would I ask a question about something I assumed was "normal"? If I felt this way and knew this to be true for me then it must be the way others feel, that was my assumption, I was wrong.

After being diagnosed and telling a few life long friends, their immediate reaction was "oh my God, that makes so much sense!!", one even said "uh, duh, how did we not think of that years ago?, and that was my reaction too, along with a slew of other feelings and realizations.

Luckily for me, I started to see a new therapist after coming out of a treatment center, per the recommendation of my previous therapist and the therapists at the treatment center. Without even knowing it, the new therapist I started seeing was not just specialist in PTSD, they happen to be a leading expert in the field of dissociative disorders. They actually teach this specific subject to psychology students and therapists who have been working for years in the field. He knew in a little over a month, but never mentioned the term DID to me until the day of the official diagnosis, I was unfamiliar with the term "DID", I, like most people had a elementary understanding of what MPD was but only from the movies and TV shows much like everyone else on the planet.

Over the course of a month, 16 visits total, he discussed my recent experiences, wanted to rule out a possible head injury in the car crash with an MRI, talked to me in depth about my childhood, talked to my other therapists and doctors, asked me a large list of questions at each visit to identify the symptoms, he threw in some that did not pertain to DID or PTSD to make sure I wasn't trying to self diagnose and to not incorrectly diagnose (obviously that would be a big problem). I also don't have every symptom but I do have the majority. There are primary "must haves" and then secondary symptoms. I have all the primary and lets say 9 out of 10 secondary to qualify as a person with DID.

It has been an amazing couple of months since the diagnosis, not easy to say the least, but enlightening, painful, sad, hopeful, and absolutely mind blowing!

I am more than happy to talk more about my experiences if you have any questions. I accept my existence, I accept and acknowledge my diagnosis, I do not share it with many people since it's new and I am still sorting out my new life, but honestly it's always been my life. I do have a lot of new things to get through and recover from but DID isn't one of them, you don't recover as I understand it, you learn to understand, have compassion for yourself and hopefully integrate. I am who I am, we are who we are, because of what happened to us years ago, and I like myself, all of my parts, we are a good group of kids that never had support or love from the people who were responsible for us. But some how I turned out to be a good person, with more love and empathy for others than you would think one would have after surviving a childhood like mine. The past was not our fault, we didn't have a choice, but we do now and we are choosing to live a life we know we always deserved.

I hope this helps.
 
G

Goldie43

Member
Joined
Jan 30, 2019
Messages
9
Location
new Zealand
#3
Thank you so much for answering. It rang so true, and made me wish I was sitting at a table having coffee with you 😊 I had huge childhood/adulthood trauma too. Abuse from family, family friends, neighbours, then of course inevitably, a partner. Prior to my diagnosis I too had lived my life in separate worlds really, assuming that everyone else felt they were looking through someone else's eyes and not really present.

I have read a lot about people with DID and there seem to be so many different types. My parts are all me, just different ages where they got stuck in trauma. I'm really only in the beginning stages of therapy for DID. It took many years to be diagnosed. Its quite a lonely diagnosis really.

I lose time a lot especially when I'm triggered. It feels like I blink and suddenly I'm in a different place doing different things with no memory of how I got there. Quite scary.

Thanks so much for reaching out
 
A

angel54

Member
Joined
Dec 13, 2018
Messages
22
Location
California, USA
#4
Hi Goldie, I have been formally diagnosed with PTSD about 15 years ago. Formally diagnosed with DID six years ago. You're not alone. You can PM me anytime, if you want. Take care, Angel
 
T

Trajal

Member
Joined
Feb 9, 2019
Messages
12
Location
Cornwall
#5
Hi there, I was relatively recently diagnosed with DID by an associate specialist, along with a few other things. For me it takes the form of me waking up in the morning and not knowing where I've been or what I've done for the last few days.

Complete blackouts with no memory at all, people I know have reported seeing me acting oddly. I used to think it was alcohol related, so I stopped drinking but it still happened. The antipsychotics go some way to lessen the frequency.
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
1,779
Location
USA
#6
Hi there.I don't really talk about it much but I was diagnosed with DID but have recovered and no longer have the diagnosis at all.

Recovery is possible.
 
R

Rainbowhel

Member
Joined
Feb 16, 2019
Messages
9
Location
Norwich
#7
I haven't been diagnosed but have been working with a specific trauma therapist for the last two years and have just completed the initial screening assessment and am looking into following it up with a more in depth assessment and diagnosis, as it just isn't helping me to be trying to shut everything down as much as I always have over the years, and I have become much more aware of the different parts of me which are being triggered pretty constantly at the moment, so am kind of trying to find ways to be working through and finding ways to connect to the different parts of myself instead of them being so disconnected and it being so chaotic and not healthy at all.

Is all very new to me to be trying to work in a different way with rhe different parts and very hard to find any semblance of peace and acceptance a lot of the time, but have also joined a peer support group which meets once a month for people who have DID and will meet for the first time with them in a few weeks and am hoping that connecting with others will help me too, as it is very difficult with it all so much of the time.
 
T

Trajal

Member
Joined
Feb 9, 2019
Messages
12
Location
Cornwall
#8
Hi Rainbowhel, I see you're in the UK. You should push your GP into referring you to a specialist mental health doctor. Or talk to the local mental health unit directly, as you are able to self refer if you're in particular crisis.

Therapists are all well and good but they can only deal with emotional psychological issues whereas DID is a biological, well neurological disorder which may require prescription drugs in the early stages of recovery at least, that a 'therapist' is unlikely to be able to help.

It's dangerous really because the term Therapist is not a restricted definition. Anyone can call themselves a therapist, unlike doctor, which requires quite a bit more study and experience.
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
1,779
Location
USA
#9
Hi Rainbowhel, I see you're in the UK. You should push your GP into referring you to a specialist mental health doctor. Or talk to the local mental health unit directly, as you are able to self refer if you're in particular crisis.

Therapists are all well and good but they can only deal with emotional psychological issues whereas DID is a biological, well neurological disorder which may require prescription drugs in the early stages of recovery at least, that a 'therapist' is unlikely to be able to help.

It's dangerous really because the term Therapist is not a restricted definition. Anyone can call themselves a therapist, unlike doctor, which requires quite a bit more study and experience.

Sorry but I disagree,DID is not a biological,neurlogical disorder.It is most definitely an emotional,psychological disorder caused by trauma.And a therapist,preferably a psychologist is the best place to go for treatment.And there are no prescription drugs that are required,the best treatment is therapy to work on the traumas in childhood that caused it in the first place.

It is actually easier to treat than PTSD.I have recovered from DID and no longer have the diagnosis but I do still struggle with PTSD.
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
1,779
Location
USA
#10
Oops,time ran out for me to be able to edit my post.

I was going to add that some meds do help while doing trauma work,for the fallout from it such as anxiety,depression,etc.

Also,I don't know anything about how the MH system works in the UK,I am in the US,so I am sure you probaly know which type of professional would be the best to see.
 
R

Rainbowhel

Member
Joined
Feb 16, 2019
Messages
9
Location
Norwich
#11
I have been under specialist mental health teams for years now which has included having a period of three years where I was in and out of hospital a lot and prescribed a variety of different meds to try and help the symptoms, with the conclusion from the teams that it was the specific trauma therapy which I needed and that medications were not helpful to me and actually made it worse. Since seeing a specialist trauma therapy for the last two years I have not had another hospital admission, though it is still very difficult facing everything coming up, but it definitely is not a physical and biological disorder which needs drugs to address in my case, though as I said I have never been averse to trying to address the symptoms of they did actually help me.

Personally I also don't see it as a disorder. If I had not had the ability to disassociate when I was young then it is very likely I would not have survived the trauma I went through. It is a survival mechanism and helped me survive, and though now it is not healthy in the same way now, it has certainly been a very important part of my survival, and learning to work with those parts and let them be, with the knowledge now that it is safe and that the same threats are not there any more, I believe is the most healthy way to come through this, and what I am trying to do with my therapist, who is experienced and qualified to be working in the field.
Helen
 
A

angel2000

New member
Joined
Feb 28, 2019
Messages
3
Location
Kentucky
#12
Hi, I'm new here too. I was diagnosed with PTSD about 10 years ago. Diagnosed with DID about 4 years ago. You can pm me any time. Take care.
 
R

Ridley

Member
Joined
Mar 16, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Fairbanks
#13
Hi, I’m new here and I’ve just been recently diagnosed with DID and suddenly a lot of things in my life starting making sense. My mother has schizophrenia so I knew from an early age that hearing voices was not a good sign and I’ve kept this to myself since around age 9. I’ve also experienced prolonged childhood abuse in many forms. I recently had to tell my psychiatrist and my husband about this because it’s rapidly getting worse. I’m losing large chunks of time, struggling with amnesia and blackouts. I’ve really wanted to find others who have DID to talk to but it took me a while to find this forum as I think it’s a pretty rare diagnosis. What do you all do to help remember things? This is all pretty scary for me because though I’ve been living with the voices for a long time I’ve never had such horrible problems with amnesia and blackouts.
 
L

LaCarpenteria

New member
Joined
Jan 28, 2019
Messages
3
Location
Los Angeles
#14
Sorry but I disagree,DID is not a biological,neurlogical disorder.It is most definitely an emotional,psychological disorder caused by trauma.And a therapist,preferably a psychologist is the best place to go for treatment.And there are no prescription drugs that are required,the best treatment is therapy to work on the traumas in childhood that caused it in the first place.

It is actually easier to treat than PTSD.I have recovered from DID and no longer have the diagnosis but I do still struggle with PTSD.
Hi there, to speak to two point of views, DID is and is not a Biological disorder all ast the same time. It is emotional of course, but emotional trauma at the key ages is what causes a biological change in our bodies. At the time when our neurons are pruning and developing and learning what “life” is, we were being abused, without a person in our lives to help us cope we created a different neurological pathway(s) than people without DID.

Without emotional trauma we would never have DID, but it does physically alter you biology.

No drugs, just therapy for me. Suppressing emotions is a huge part of my DID so I need to feel it all to be able to gain understanding and cope.

Sidebar: what do you do when your what used to be “the most perfect spouse a human could ask for” can’t handle the way things are now and wants the pre-diagnosis life back? He is like a robot regurgitating what therapists say and what you’re supposed to say to someone you can’t relate to, “what do you need from me in terms of support? How would you like me to react to you? How can I set you up for optimal success? I can’t stay up every night talking to you about how you’re feeling, I have to sleep, I’m a human.” He talks as if he’s read a list of “things to say to someone with DID or another mental illness or disorder” or a pamphlet on how to talk to people who’s parents just sided when you are a sociopath and have no empathy. **sorry for the rant, wrong thread, I just had to get it out**
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
1,779
Location
USA
#15
Maybe you need to remind your spouse that nothing has changed except you now have a name for what you have been struggling with?Remind him that DID began/was created at a very young age in childhood not just since you were diagnosed so you are the same person you have always been(pun intended) and that you would prefer he treat you as he always has and not as your therapist or other mental health professional.
 
SunnyDaze

SunnyDaze

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 11, 2017
Messages
1,779
Location
USA
#16
Hi there.I don't really talk about it much but I was diagnosed with DID but have recovered and no longer have the diagnosis at all.

Recovery is possible.
Just making a freindly bump of my own post just to make sure people know that full recovery from DID is possible.I can't claim that it was because of anything I did or didn't do,I believe I just got lucky tbh.