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is there a term for this? or any ways to stop doing it?

mortimergoth23

mortimergoth23

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hi, i'm new to this so i apologise if i do anything wrong here.
i have an issue where my mind will constantly tell me i'm faking things. i'm not sure if there's a term for it, but essentially i will think something and then my brain will tell me "you don't actually think that" or something along those lines, and then i feel i need to convince myself to believe something when i did believe it beforehand. another example is i will laugh at something and my mind will tell me "you didn't actually find that funny". the closest i can describe it is maybe self-gaslighting? but i'm not sure that term fits. has anyone else dealt with this? is there a term for it? do you have any tips on how to make it stop happening?
 
D

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Hello and welcome to the forum. It must be very distressing to always question your thoughts. I do not have any tips but I just wanted to welcome you.
 
Bluejay7500

Bluejay7500

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I feel my mind altering because of a medication change. I have similar symptoms. Not sure what gas lighting is? And how you can brain wash yourself? Thought it would involve a third party. But I get ya... you feel self sabotage.
 
D

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I've struggled with this most of my life and sometime still do but I am improving...I don't know if there is a term for it but self-gaslighting really fits...
I find for me it is connected to my history of severe insecurity and needing "confirmation" from other people, like let's say I want to paint. I sometimes have trouble feeling I was "really" creative or genuine when I painted it, until someone else sees it and says it's creative or interesting or cool or whatever. Even if I was initially proud of it or happy with it, it doesn't take long for me to start questioning if I "really" was genuine when I made it.
For me I feel it stems from insecurity and not trusting my intuition. As I've worked on trusting myself..I have seen this almost disappear

I also think for me it comes from not feeling some emotions in the "normal" way, maybe it's not connected at all but I am just thinking out loud here. Like, I have a problem with always feeling like I am being watched/recorded/whatever, but I don't seem or feel as distressed as I probably "should" feel, I just experience anxiety and other emotions very differently/not "fully" so that leads me to question myself a lot "do you really believe this?"
It doesn't help that I had a therapist before tell me "you don't really believe that" when I said I was scared I was being stalked! That wasn't the cause of the second-guessing but it sure did amplify it for a long time!

I guess my advice, if it can even be called that, is to practice finalizing the decision or accepting the feeling. I did this a lot with music.. because I used to have a lot of trouble thinking "do I really like this music?" And it was a good starting point for me to just be like okay yes yes I do really like this music, I love it! I love bad music sometimes too! And I don't careeeee I like what I like, I am inspired by what I am inspired by, I am intrigued by what I am intrigued by, you know? I also am not usually one for affirmations really but I would always say "I trust" when I did yoga, meaning I trust myself.
Whatever I am feeling, I trust that it's there and I'm not "faking it"
 
Zero One

Zero One

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hi, i'm new to this so i apologise if i do anything wrong here.
i have an issue where my mind will constantly tell me i'm faking things. i'm not sure if there's a term for it, but essentially i will think something and then my brain will tell me "you don't actually think that" or something along those lines, and then i feel i need to convince myself to believe something when i did believe it beforehand. another example is i will laugh at something and my mind will tell me "you didn't actually find that funny". the closest i can describe it is maybe self-gaslighting? but i'm not sure that term fits. has anyone else dealt with this? is there a term for it? do you have any tips on how to make it stop happening?
I'm dealing with a lot of this today. I don't know the term for this but there must be one. Geodon works to stop that but my psychosis was coming back on Geodon so they put me on Seroquel.
 
Zero One

Zero One

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Joined
May 19, 2020
Messages
5,101
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I feel my mind altering because of a medication change. I have similar symptoms. Not sure what gas lighting is? And how you can brain wash yourself? Thought it would involve a third party. But I get ya... you feel self sabotage.
Got this from Healthline
What is gaslighting?

Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse that’s seen in abusive relationships. It’s the act of manipulating a person by forcing them to question their thoughts, memories, and the events occurring around them. A victim of gaslighting can be pushed so far that they question their own sanity.
i had a psychiatrist do this to me once I guess just to see how psychotic I get, I started having hallucinations immediately. The voices I have call it an illusion not a hallucination...and that might be gaslighting right there. They often make these abstract intellectual jokes.
 
Bluejay7500

Bluejay7500

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Sounds nasty to do to someone. Also sounds like someone would have to be mentally ill to do this.
 
Bluejay7500

Bluejay7500

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Gas lighting is a funny word but not funny to do... catchy little bit. ☺ I feel like this has been done a lot in my town. Since I went to private school my old classmates are no longer in my life but maybe they are thinking of me like this... right.
 
mortimergoth23

mortimergoth23

New member
Joined
Nov 26, 2020
Messages
3
Location
australia
I've struggled with this most of my life and sometime still do but I am improving...I don't know if there is a term for it but self-gaslighting really fits...
I find for me it is connected to my history of severe insecurity and needing "confirmation" from other people, like let's say I want to paint. I sometimes have trouble feeling I was "really" creative or genuine when I painted it, until someone else sees it and says it's creative or interesting or cool or whatever. Even if I was initially proud of it or happy with it, it doesn't take long for me to start questioning if I "really" was genuine when I made it.
For me I feel it stems from insecurity and not trusting my intuition. As I've worked on trusting myself..I have seen this almost disappear

I also think for me it comes from not feeling some emotions in the "normal" way, maybe it's not connected at all but I am just thinking out loud here. Like, I have a problem with always feeling like I am being watched/recorded/whatever, but I don't seem or feel as distressed as I probably "should" feel, I just experience anxiety and other emotions very differently/not "fully" so that leads me to question myself a lot "do you really believe this?"
It doesn't help that I had a therapist before tell me "you don't really believe that" when I said I was scared I was being stalked! That wasn't the cause of the second-guessing but it sure did amplify it for a long time!

I guess my advice, if it can even be called that, is to practice finalizing the decision or accepting the feeling. I did this a lot with music.. because I used to have a lot of trouble thinking "do I really like this music?" And it was a good starting point for me to just be like okay yes yes I do really like this music, I love it! I love bad music sometimes too! And I don't careeeee I like what I like, I am inspired by what I am inspired by, I am intrigued by what I am intrigued by, you know? I also am not usually one for affirmations really but I would always say "I trust" when I did yoga, meaning I trust myself.
Whatever I am feeling, I trust that it's there and I'm not "faking it"
you should look into imposter syndrome. that sounds a lot like what you're experiencing :)
 
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