- Sep 15, 2020
That's some pretty epic and hard work to get to where you aren't avoiding social gatherings, so first. WTFG!! seriously, that's impressive. try to give yourself credit for that often!I don't avoid social gatherings anymore
who says? Also, living life with a mental health disorder pretty much automatically makes you a strong person. Kind of just a fact. Everyone struggles with daily life things but you have an extra weight the moment you wake up. Don't kid yourself. You are strong.I should be more grown up and stronger
Ugh. Hate small talk. Detest small talk. Anytime I ever engage in it I end up ruminating later about how dumb I must have sounded. Something my p-doc told me (probably a decade ago) is that everyone else is so consumed and worried about their own crap they really aren't noticing yours. That one kind of hit home for me because I am usually hyper-aware of how awkward I am and that everyone must notice. Nope. They don't. Keep that in mind maybe.someone trys to do small talk with me.
I found that repeating back what they've said gives my brain time to process and form a reply. Also the added benefit of them thinking I'm really listening.my mind goes blank or I feel to stressed to answer.
I also have a bunch of ready responses for deferring conversation so the awkward 8 second pause isn't so obvious.
things like "wait, you did/said what?"
"im not sure, what do you think"
"im dont knw I havent thought much about it/that"
or lame cliche things everyone loves for like weather
basically the memes of the real world
mirroring people. smile when they laugh
"heh, yeah, that's a good one"
maybe even practice some jokes for yourself to tell?
part of my therapy was communicating courses. something like that might help also if you can find one.
is there someone you know, a therapist/friend/family member that can help you figure out your strengths?because I don't know what my strengths are
you could write them down so you can remind yourself of them when you start to get down on yourself.
and is it ever really gone? no. never. it is manageable though.
and it flows good and bad, up and down, just like everything else.