Is it Anxiety or something else? Please help

Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#1
Hi everyone,

3 weeks ago, I was doing awesome. I even thought about tapering off of Escitalopram. All of a sudden, things took a un ugly turn starting with a panic attack then anxiety. It’s been going on for a while no. Nothing overwhelming but it’s getting there.

This morning I woke up feeling uncomfortable and on edge. I needed to drive somewhere. When I was at a stoplight, the clouds’ reflecting on the car ahead of me formed an image. It looked like a man’s head with a pointy nose. Nothing special but I made something else off of the reflection. Then, I imagined the reflection as someone holding a dead baby. Right away, I panicked and thought that I have psychosis. It was such an intense and uncomfortable feeling. It ruined my whole day. I knew what I imagined was the trigger. I don’t know what’s going on with me.

Should I be concerned? Or is it just anxiety? I really can’t and don’t understand what’s happening.

I forgot to mention that right away I started having intrusive thoughts about loosing control and being admitted to the hospital.

Please help. I need an explanation or if someone had a similar experience.
 
C

Confusedandanxious

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#2
Hey.
It sounds like you're fearful of going back to hospital, so much so that its causing anxiety just at the thought of it alone.
 
Bizzarebitrary

Bizzarebitrary

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#3
Our brains are wired to find patterns even when none exist and to seek explanations and connections. It sounds like you were anxious before you even left your home and that your brain looked for and found something out in the world that seemed really scary. Your description sounded scary to me.

When anxiety pops up out of nowhere, we naturally look to external reasons for it - usually a person or an event. These can trigger anxiety but the reaction is disproportionate to the event because it's usually an implicit memory in our bodies not a memory we recollect. I hope that makes sense.

I suggest you tell your doctor about this episode just in case there is some connection to the medication or supplements you're taking. Hope you're feeling better.
 
daffy

daffy

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#4
I would take it as a warning hopeful . You say you were thing of tapering of your meds and I think it’s was your sub conscious telling you not to . If the meds are working and not causing side effects what is the reason to want to come off them.

How are you feeling now have the intrusive thoughts eased or ar they just as bad.

Why not have a chat with your MH advisor and tell them your fears and see what they have to say

Daf:hug:
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#5
Hey.
It sounds like you're fearful of going back to hospital, so much so that its causing anxiety just at the thought of it alone.
Thanks for replying to me.
I’ve never been admitted to the hospital for mental illness but I am terrified of that thought. The idea of going back to the hospital always starts after the panic and anxiety. I am not aware if it’s triggering my anxiety.
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#6
Our brains are wired to find patterns even when none exist and to seek explanations and connections. It sounds like you were anxious before you even left your home and that your brain looked for and found something out in the world that seemed really scary. Your description sounded scary to me.

When anxiety pops up out of nowhere, we naturally look to external reasons for it - usually a person or an event. These can trigger anxiety but the reaction is disproportionate to the event because it's usually an implicit memory in our bodies not a memory we recollect. I hope that makes sense.

I suggest you tell your doctor about this episode just in case there is some connection to the medication or supplements you're taking. Hope you're feeling better.
I appreciate your reply and insight.

I’ve seen so much violence in my life because of the 3 wars that I’ve survived. I’m so anti violence and try to stay away from it as much as possible. I know it’s one of the triggers except this time it’s different and confusing.

I already talked with my psychiatrist. I don’t think it’s medication related because Escitalopram actually helped me and I’ve been on it since November of 2018. This problem started recently. My psychiatrist suggested that I up my dose but I’ve been waiting for my insurance approval.

Thank you so much.
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#7
I would take it as a warning hopeful . You say you were thing of tapering of your meds and I think it’s was your sub conscious telling you not to . If the meds are working and not causing side effects what is the reason to want to come off them.

How are you feeling now have the intrusive thoughts eased or ar they just as bad.

Why not have a chat with your MH advisor and tell them your fears and see what they have to say

Daf:hug:
This is the first time ever in my whole life trying an antidepressant. I don’t even take medications for a cold.

My intrusive are Up and down. One day I am just normal. When I get anxious, they are very intense and weird. I can say they are not as bad as when I first started Escitalopram.

I will call in a few hours to check for a quick appointment today hopefully.

Thank you Daf :hug:
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#8
This unbelievable. I was anxious about an hour ago. Now, I feel so excited and happy to the point I just want to jump up and down from happiness. This has put me on the mood to make a few phone calls with friends and I am thinking about going out to enjoy the sun 🙂.

Now, I am looking back at yesterday and smiling saying to myself that it was funny the way I felt and acted yesterday.

I want to thank all of you again. I will keep you posted on how this goes.
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#9
I had an appointment with my therapist earlier today. She assured me that it wasn’t psychosis or hallucination. If I was psychotic, I should’ve believed that what I was seeing is real.
It is anxiety. I should discuss my medication with my psychiatrist. Escitalopram might have some side effects.
 
N

natalie

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#10
Hi Hopeful,

Ah well there you go, I would definitely mention this problem, to the pschartirst, and tell them that you are waiting for insurance approval, they might be able to say, well hang on a minute, that isn't in theire directorative, threfore, he could give authority as they say, for the following right now, to up the dose.

I as well, don't think it's pshycosis, more likeand as you say, having panicky attacks, anxiety.

I am sorry to hear this, and I do wish you well in the not too near distant future.


Also, I think i tmight be anxiety over the insurance approval. just a tip of a thought.


Do take care.
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#11
Hi @natalie

I really appreciate it you wishing me well 🙂.

I forgot to mention that my insurance approved the new dosage and I started it last night. I upped my dose from 30 mg to 35 mg instead of 40 as I am not sure if what I’m experiencing is a side effect of the medication.

Escitalopram worked for me from November of last year until about 3 weeks ago when I started having new symptoms. Subconsciously, I get triggered by images that I can’t understand what they are at first.

To test myself and my mind, I watched a horror movie earlier and I was totally fine. No panic attacks or anxiety.

I do feel that I am doing better than yesterday.
 
N

natalie

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#12
HI Hopeful,

I'm so glad to hear you are feeling much better.

Take care now.
 
Dang80

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#13
Hiya hopeful! I too thought I had psychosis when I first had to make the call... I was hearing things, and I saw someone standing there in the corner of my eye. I could tell you exactly what he was wearing too! Turned to look at him, and there was a garage wall there..... no man. They told me it was chronic anxiety. I was relieved to say the least. So I very much feel your pain bud. Hope you're feeling a little better today 😊 x
 
Hopeful313

Hopeful313

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#14
Hi @Dang80

I was very happy that it wasn’t psychosis 😁. Very glad yours isn’t too. I’ve had anxiety for a long time now that it must be chronic.

I am very sensitive and don’t like violence at all especially against kids. Thoughts or imagination of violence or death trigger my anxiety and emotions. I’ve seen so much of it in my life. That’s why my imagination went south when I saw that reflection of the clouds. Now I know to control my thoughts and imagination and try to divert them into a positive direction.

I am feeling a lot better and I am optimistic that I will get over it.

Thank you and I wish you a healthy and happy life.
 

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