Is anyone like this as well?

K

KingKhan

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Joined
Aug 5, 2019
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India
This is hard to describe but here I go:
I do not know how how to behave or act in front of others. I do not know how or what to talk about. My body language is almost every time awkward and I feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I make so many mistakes and awkward moments. I never seem to have confidence. I have virtually no friends and when I gather the courage to talk to someone new, I mess it up by saying the wrong things. I have to rationally think "What should I do?" to know how to react and that too is with too many failures. I tried multiple times to go without rationalizing on how to act but it never works out well.

There it is. The best I can define myself. Is there anyone who is like this? And if someone was like this, how did you get over it?
 
HauntedWitch

HauntedWitch

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Jul 9, 2019
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somewhere between here and there
This is hard to describe but here I go:
I do not know how how to behave or act in front of others. I do not know how or what to talk about. My body language is almost every time awkward and I feel uncomfortable in my own skin. I make so many mistakes and awkward moments. I never seem to have confidence. I have virtually no friends and when I gather the courage to talk to someone new, I mess it up by saying the wrong things. I have to rationally think "What should I do?" to know how to react and that too is with too many failures. I tried multiple times to go without rationalizing on how to act but it never works out well.

There it is. The best I can define myself. Is there anyone who is like this? And if someone was like this, how did you get over it?
What you are describing is called Social Anxiety. Most people with mental health issues have it to some extent. I doubt it's curable -- in other words, you will probably always feel awkward, but developing and improving social skills is something that can be worked on with a therapist.
 
W

Watamote

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Joined
May 22, 2019
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US
Yeah, just tend to avoid people as much as I possibly can. I don't have anything in common with anyone that I know in my area so conversations are usually one-sided. People tend to always ask about personal stuff that I'm not comfortable talking about like work and family. These things are ingrained into our culture and used as a way to determine a person's worth. Your social anxiety sounds a bit like mine, however, at least you are putting yourself into these situations. Take some pride in that.
 
L

Laudanum

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May 30, 2019
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Surrey
Maybe have a few pre-defined answers to common questions, and ask questions yourself? Most people love talking about themselves and might not even notice you aren't giving much away.

Also, don't worry about the outcome and don't assume you will mess it up when communicating. If you do, don't worry about it, or it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
 
I

indigo6

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Jan 30, 2019
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46
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UK
I feel same. I honestly dont know who Im supposed to be around people. I feel I will stand out as odd. Im supposed to be like them, inside and out. If I could click my fingers and turn into something that would keep them happy. that would be good. I keep quiet mostly tryng to be true to myself. I find small talk and gossip exhausting. Also do not like being asked questions, private person and never ask personal details of people. I fear being sussed as depressive/ anxiety person too.
 
HauntedWitch

HauntedWitch

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448
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somewhere between here and there
I feel same. I keep quiet mostly tryng to be true to myself. I find small talk and gossip exhausting..
I hear you about the small talk and gossip.

Generally speaking, I can't think of much to say, so I end up just listening, which isn't bad in itself. This is only getting worse with age!
 
I

indigo6

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Jan 30, 2019
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UK
Listening is good and I notice more when I do.
 

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