Invisible

Valka

Valka

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 12, 2019
Messages
255
Location
England (NW)
#1
It doesn't matter how hard I seem to try, I constantly feel like a misfit and like I'm invisible to people.
I never used to feel that way, at least not to this extent.

I've been feeling like I want to just collapse on the floor and cry or something pathetic. But I can't.
I just feel like everything is welling up inside and I don't have any sort of output for it. I haven't touched a drink in well over ten years (just don't like the taste) but for some reason today I felt like just downing everything I could find just to. I don't even know why. Escape maybe?

I'm fed up of being treated like crap by people. I look in the mirror and start to hate myself.
I get people telling me things like how I'm nice and I should just go out and date people or whatever. While those words are well intentioned they don't really change the reality of things. After all the last person who wanted anything to do with me used me for free holidays for years, the one before that took my money and even before that I had a 'friend' who just ended up trying to use me to get back at her ex boyfriend.

Like what the hell is wrong with me that I can't just seem to have a normal friendship or relationship. I either try to make friends and people just push me away or stay in my own world seperate from everyone else.
 
R

Ramson bangers

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 1, 2019
Messages
523
Location
England
#2
Your a good lad valka. The more we get treated like shit the stronger we become. Never hate yourself i think highly of you.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
8,126
Location
England
#3
Hi,
Sorry your struggling, I think many of us feel the same at times.
Hear to listen anytime.
Hope it helps venting your feelings etc.
Don't be to hard on yourself,
Take care
 
megirl

megirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2010
Messages
5,057
Location
NZ
#4
Valka,
Firstly well done with the alcohol, 10 years thats great.
Finally I have come to the conclusion that its the most genuine and caring people that get used.
Are you looking after yourself, I know thats hard at times like this,
Please dont hate yourself you don't deserve that, depression does that as you know, its an ugly illness
I can see from your posts what a kind and thoughtful person you are.
Keep posting you know we are here for you
megirl x