introduction

Libraryman

Libraryman

Member
Joined
May 13, 2019
Messages
11
Location
East Coast
#1
My name is Libraryman. This is my intro, but its also something ive been thinking about regarding schizophrenia.
I was diagnosed with schizophrenia 5 years ago. Ive had many different things happen to me but what I want to focus on is what schizophrenia means to me and what its like to live with it. Ill start off by saying, Im troubled with hallucinations and such. And that is basically what Im focusing on. What schizophrenia is, for me. Its a disease in the brain. I have trouble reconciling reality, senses, etc. If someone were to say, well I have telepathic powers, my responce would be,
"schizophrenia is a disease that makes it impossible to understand reality and its most appreciable 5 senses. Why would adding another sense into the conversation be a good idea." I want to explore unqiue ideas, but thats just
ridiculous. This isnt a level that you reach to get to telepathy, and its offensive to people that are trying to find help. Which brings me to a common problem that I also share. In that, dealing with people, often leads me to
a point where it feels like its 'all in my head'. One thing ill quickly mention is that, I carry down all possibilities. So maybe its all in my head, or maybe its more complex than that. And complex is somewhere I can start at. Because it is all complex, and I take a dynamic approach to it as much as possible. I read somewhere that someone thought schizophrenia is like a 'level' you get to. In other words, its normal, and apart of ascending through human intelligence. Well, maybe that is the case on a strange accelerated planet, but for now, its just more complex than that. For instance, how about a writer who is striving for strange ideas on purpose. As opposed to a normal person, wanting normalcy. Even Im a writer
artist, and still I prefer to want as normal as possible. And its because I know the consequences. Heres another way to look at it. Theres this term, I think it originated from environmental science, but its called "context dependency".
Which means, the more focused you are on the, in this case, hallucinations, the more you lose track of the problem at hand. Which should be fairly obvious. Dealing with your hallucinations, 'making them real'? Thats a pretty big no-no.
And sometimes its just a matter of realizing, "Have i experienced this before, what did I learn, and what can I do about it?" For instance, sometimes hallucinations can meet certain cases of things youve seen during a psychedelic
trip, if like me, youve had the misfortune of experiencing. Where in case one, youve felt that nervous feeling, like something had violated your senses. Or in case two, where you've witnessed inanimate objects moving.
The point here is that, I used something closest in relation to the hallucinations I was having naturally, and then compared. And alls that takes is making an approximation of things in your life, and seeing if any scenarios could compare, and then aiding in explanation. It helps to make comparisons, it helps to know what action your gonna take before you take it. You dont want to end up feeding into your visions. One main goal should always be, establishing whats fake from reality and vice versa. It's an unfortunate thing, but thats what schizophrenia is about.
Schizophrenia is misunderstood. Schizophrenia is a serious problem. How people talk to each other, well atleast what I read about... It really makes ya think. So thats partly what this is about. Its definitley about helping others; helping the community overcome obstacles and find a new approach. Theres much more I want to explore. I think Im being very realistic... So, let me know your thoughts. Anything is appreciated.
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

Well-known member
Joined
May 6, 2017
Messages
415
Location
Sheffiield
#3
Welcome to the forums!

I've had psychosis and I'm currently a voice hearer, I think I'd be diagnosed with schizophrenia if my psychologist was into labels but she's not, she just treats symptoms so I'm on 10mg of Aripiprazole and 4mg of Risperidone to treat the voice that I hear as the meds reduce the volume of the voice by 95% letting me focus and concentrate and to stop the physical things this voice can do to me as he can cause me pain and make small muscles in my face twitch.

What medication are you on and what sort of hallucinations are you suffering from? I've had hallucinations for 4 out of 5 senses, hearing, taste, smell and tactile but nothing visual.
 
Libraryman

Libraryman

Member
Joined
May 13, 2019
Messages
11
Location
East Coast
#4
Welcome to the forums!
I've had psychosis and I'm currently a voice hearer, I think I'd be diagnosed with schizophrenia if my psychologist was into labels but she's not, she just treats symptoms so I'm on 10mg of Aripiprazole and 4mg of Risperidone to treat the voice that I hear as the meds reduce the volume of the voice by 95% letting me focus and concentrate and to stop the physical things this voice can do to me as he can cause me pain and make small muscles in my face twitch.
What medication are you on and what sort of hallucinations are you suffering from? I've had hallucinations for 4 out of 5 senses, hearing, taste, smell and tactile but nothing visual.
Hey thanks for the reply. I dont have the name of the medication, ill get that for you when I can; As ive changed meds several times now. Sorry to hear bout the physical things youre goin through, with the muscle twitch. It reminds me of two things; one being my grandmom whos suffered from something similar since, well her whole life. And secondly, the time i had a searing pain in my tooth area that I couldnt get to go away for the longest. It was like a phantom pain, that started from stress, trauma, actual tooth problems, and heavy/hard drugs. Luckily, I got it too disappear long ago... Not exactly sure what I did. Unfortunately, my grandmom's problem has never been looked into. But its something I can seek to find an answer to. Shes very resistant, but we are close enough that she might share with me her experience with it. I believe I have heard of it before but my memory is failing me at the current moment. And thx for the reply, ill look that up for you.
 
V

Ven8033

Member
Joined
May 19, 2019
Messages
16
Location
Colorado USA
#5
Hi there, welcome.
I can relate somewhat to you, having been diagnosed with bipolar. I hope you find what you’re looking for. There’s so much stigma against mental illnesses. It’s unlike physical illnesses where you can see someone is sick, check their temperature, do an MRI, etc. I’m even guilty of not recognizing my symptoms earlier on because it isn’t something I could measure.
 
Libraryman

Libraryman

Member
Joined
May 13, 2019
Messages
11
Location
East Coast
#7
Welcome to the forums!
What medication are you on and what sort of hallucinations are you suffering from? I've had hallucinations for 4 out of 5 senses, hearing, taste, smell and tactile but nothing visual.
I just checked and im also on 10mg of Aripiprazole, which has been for about 5 months. Although maybe you can comment on this, but its hard for me to say if its helped, since everything seems to be getting better. And so im uncertain if I can say it was definitely the medicine, my situation, or both. Like I tell my psych, Its hard to tell one medicine from the other, but my life for the most part is better, and I took the other medicines during turmoil. Which was two/three other ones. Remeron was one... Risperidone was another. There was another but I dont think ill remember it. I have mostly auditory hallucinations, that can proliferate and become visual etc. Theyve never really went away fully, so im just hangin in there.
 
NWiddi

NWiddi

Well-known member
Joined
May 6, 2017
Messages
415
Location
Sheffiield
#8
My voice has never gone away fully either and he talks all day long every day without a break, I'm lucky if I get five minutes of silence at a time, the best thing the medication did was reduce his volume by around 95% so he's a lot quieter and I'm much happier for it.

I don't get full blown visual hallucinations but he puts images in my mind all the time.
 

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