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Introduction

J

Joshua1985

Member
Joined
Mar 9, 2015
Messages
8
Location
South Carolina U.S.
I'd like to explain a bit of who I am... I've already posted in this forum, but it didn't have a lot of clear information about who I am and what my difficulties are.

First of all, has anybody ever had a difficulty with mirrors? I really do feel very strange saying that as I believe in it whole heartedly but it also makes me feel like I want to cry at the same time. If I'm being over dramatic for anybody then I do apologize for that :).

Anyway, back to mirrors.

Several years ago I started thinking that when I looked into a mirror that I saw something more than just my reflection, I thought I saw somebody that looked exactly like me, but wasn't me. I could even every now and then feel like this person was smiling at me when I wasn't doing anything at all... and now I fully believe it.

Right now, every time I go to look at a mirror... if it's just for morning things to comb my hair and what not I don't normally look my reflection in the eye because I know that if I do that I'm going to be there for awhile. My reflection itself has become another person in a way. It's the better and stronger part of me. I look at him and feel that he's my helper and protector. When I'm sad I can even feel him touching my face with his hand. I sometimes feel like I'm on the other side of the mirror looking at him and he can be out here. I sometimes wish that he would be out here because I know he would do better.

You see, I no longer think of my reflection as just a reflection but as another entity all together but he is still always a part of me.

I hope I'm not bothering anybody by saying all this. I know that to a lot of people it can sound stupid or made up... it even sounds strange to me, but I know that it's real.

Please feel free to comment on here. I really do want help and that's why I came here.
 
Mark_01

Mark_01

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 4, 2013
Messages
2,590
Location
California
Hello, Joshua1985, welcome to the forum. It is not strange to see an alternate self in the mirror. Lots of people look in the mirror and think they see a different person. I look in the mirror and wonder when I got so old, I don't feel old, but I have changed. My image of self is not what it use to be.
 
J

Joshua1985

Member
Joined
Mar 9, 2015
Messages
8
Location
South Carolina U.S.
Hey Mark. It was about 6 years ago I think when I first started seeing him but didn't know what to think. I think I still don't know all that he is... if that makes sense. It's like he's an entirely different half of me but is a different person all together.

I hope I'm not bothering you or being redundant... There's so much that I want to say on here and don't know how to say it and I feel stupid because of it. I have to keep going though no matter how incredibly painful it gets.

It's like every day I go out to my classes (I'm an older student at a University) and for awhile I'm able to forget about my pain, but then the truth comes back when I get back to my room...

I hope I'm not annoying people when I say this, but I really hope that I don't get people upset at me. This really is who I am... I just want to have a place where people won't criticize or get angry with me.
 
Mark_01

Mark_01

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 4, 2013
Messages
2,590
Location
California
You are not bothering me and this is a very good place where people won't criticize you or get angry. If it is really disturbing you, you should really talk to someone about it. Don't they have a clinic on your campus where you can see a doctor? Being a student at a university can be very stressful, and if you were already having problems, it can make them worse.
 
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