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in a dream like state this is freeking me out...

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Goingback1

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
49
Location
Regina Saskatchewan
my anxiety and depression have been very bad for over a year now. i feel like im in a dream. everything physically looks darker and gloomy like i have sunglasses on! everything is going by slow in my vision but my mind is racing from anxiety at a fast rate and it wont calm down. my anxiety is constant and i cant get in to see the doctor for a month! its like a bad dream
 
Ana221

Ana221

Member
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
7
Location
Portugal
Hi honey, have you heard of despersonalization? It's pretty common for people with anxiety and depression to have it, everything around us feels like some sort of dream and we enter an automatic state of mind where we can function but we're not really "there".
I'm not sure I'm good at explaining it and I'm not an expert, but from your description it sounds a lot like this. This happens because in a way our brain wants to protect us and shut us off for a while. Just know that it can't harm you, it's a defense mechanism :)
 
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Zoe1

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Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
13,578
Location
Nowhere
hi Goingback :welcome:

do you have any distractions, things you like to do
we cant face our deep stuff all in one go

ways of giving yourself a break, music , books
any friends you could see ? / talk to

:grouphug:🎵🌅🎼🌻🍀
 
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Goingback1

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
49
Location
Regina Saskatchewan
Hi honey, have you heard of despersonalization? It's pretty common for people with anxiety and depression to have it, everything around us feels like some sort of dream and we enter an automatic state of mind where we can function but we're not really "there".
I'm not sure I'm good at explaining it and I'm not an expert, but from your description it sounds a lot like this. This happens because in a way our brain wants to protect us and shut us off for a while. Just know that it can't harm you, it's a defense mechanism :)
Thank you I agree with u that this seems like rerealization. Its very weird. And the type of weird that freeks you out. Its so uncomfortable and if I go inside my apartment or if I go in a building like a grocery store u can really feel the derealization at its highest point. The florescent lighting in stores or the lights in ur house really add to the gloomy vision as you adjust from outside light to indoor. Its very trippy and coming from someone who was never a fan of partying tripping out is not a good time for me. Uhg I can't even function Ive bumped into people I know around town and I'm like whoaaa this is an odd feeling seeing people I know and trying to act normal and speak to them in this derealized state I can't do it I just say "heyyy to them I'm in a rush sry I'll talk to u guys later!" I don't know what I should I do I'm at a point where I know I need medication for this and I haven't had much luck with SSRI antidepressants. I feel like trying street drugs to see which one calms me down and brings me back to normal. Maybe perkocets, cocaine, adderall, or magic mushrooms might help me. I know that sounds crazy to say but living in this current state of mind is just to scary my anxiety won't shut down. Sigh
 
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Goingback1

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
49
Location
Regina Saskatchewan
hi Goingback :welcome:

do you have any distractions, things you like to do
we cant face our deep stuff all in one go

ways of giving yourself a break, music , books
any friends you could see ? / talk to

:grouphug:🎵🌅🎼🌻🍀
I wish I could play a video game or watch tv I can't sit down tho I can't stop moving. Trying to understand a movie or follow anything mentally is to hard it freeks me out. My mind is on auto pilot and it can't function only to walk around because I'm always panicking and to eat food and wait till I'm tired until I drop and fall asleep. Rinse and repeat the next day my brain is seriously stuck in flight or fight it's to much
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
13,578
Location
Nowhere
n yeah I have been there ... I'm so sorry

with me it was at one point a side effect of my medication
that gave me a very restless condition

once we got the right medication I got better

maybe its also not the meds

you've only just arrived here , so give the forum a chance
and explore the different sub forums
like this one, see what others have said in their posts
it might help you

:grouphug:🍀🌅🎼🌻:)
 
Ana221

Ana221

Member
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
7
Location
Portugal
Thank you I agree with u that this seems like rerealization. Its very weird. And the type of weird that freeks you out. Its so uncomfortable and if I go inside my apartment or if I go in a building like a grocery store u can really feel the derealization at its highest point. The florescent lighting in stores or the lights in ur house really add to the gloomy vision as you adjust from outside light to indoor. Its very trippy and coming from someone who was never a fan of partying tripping out is not a good time for me. Uhg I can't even function Ive bumped into people I know around town and I'm like whoaaa this is an odd feeling seeing people I know and trying to act normal and speak to them in this derealized state I can't do it I just say "heyyy to them I'm in a rush sry I'll talk to u guys later!" I don't know what I should I do I'm at a point where I know I need medication for this and I haven't had much luck with SSRI antidepressants. I feel like trying street drugs to see which one calms me down and brings me back to normal. Maybe perkocets, cocaine, adderall, or magic mushrooms might help me. I know that sounds crazy to say but living in this current state of mind is just to scary my anxiety won't shut down. Sigh
Oh I know exactly how you feel, trust me. I've been like that a lot of times. Please, please, please don't do street drugs though, they'll just make it worse, it would make you really trippy. Are you on any medication for anxiety besides antidepressants? That's what is usually prescribed for these situations. It can take a while to find the right ones for you, I am in the moment having trouble with mine too :/
I'll give you a tip though, while that can't get sorted out, try to "awaken" your five senses. For example, when I get like that I start tapping on things and really feeling the textures, belts, carpets, the wall, the furniture, what have you. I look like a lunatic! Ahah Fortunately my parents never saw me do that! Touch really seems to ground me and bring me back just a little to feel more real. You can also try eating and really savouring something, or smelling something, noticing the details. It's all about what works for you, and it focuses your mind on something besides what's going on in there! :)
 
G

Goingback1

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
49
Location
Regina Saskatchewan
Oh I know exactly how you feel, trust me. I've been like that a lot of times. Please, please, please don't do street drugs though, they'll just make it worse, it would make you really trippy. Are you on any medication for anxiety besides antidepressants? That's what is usually prescribed for these situations. It can take a while to find the right ones for you, I am in the moment having trouble with mine too :/
I'll give you a tip though, while that can't get sorted out, try to "awaken" your five senses. For example, when I get like that I start tapping on things and really feeling the textures, belts, carpets, the wall, the furniture, what have you. I look like a lunatic! Ahah Fortunately my parents never saw me do that! Touch really seems to ground me and bring me back just a little to feel more real. You can also try eating and really savouring something, or smelling something, noticing the details. It's all about what works for you, and it focuses your mind on something besides what's going on in there! :)
Ty so much for the help. I've only tried a few SSRI meds and Ativan which really don't cut it. Sighhhhhhhhh I guess I should try different class medications I don't know of I'll find one tho that works that's the scary part. The only med I'm taking is currently is cymbalta which it's not doing anything. Before I started it I was the same as I am now and after months of taking it no improvement. I think I might have some bipolar type 2 in me?? I don't get rapid mood swings but I do feel really off and anxious but depressed and just like I'm jumping out of my skin all at the same time....
 
Ana221

Ana221

Member
Joined
Mar 26, 2020
Messages
7
Location
Portugal
Ty so much for the help. I've only tried a few SSRI meds and Ativan which really don't cut it. Sighhhhhhhhh I guess I should try different class medications I don't know of I'll find one tho that works that's the scary part. The only med I'm taking is currently is cymbalta which it's not doing anything. Before I started it I was the same as I am now and after months of taking it no improvement. I think I might have some bipolar type 2 in me?? I don't get rapid mood swings but I do feel really off and anxious but depressed and just like I'm jumping out of my skin all at the same time....
Well, the meds only do half the work, they're helpful when they work, making it easier for us to also do our part in our mental health. I think you will find the right one for you though! :D
If you're not seeing a psychologist, I advise you to do that too, I used to think they were bullshit but I finally found a good one :) It can feel great to just talk our hearts out with no judgment
It's extremely tiring and frightening to be in your situation, and it's hard to get out of it. May I also advise you to try out some calming binaural beats? You can find those on youtube, the music is relaxing and the comments are very positive and supportive. You could also try to go on runs or do any sort of exercise to get rid of all that anxious energy :)
I know it feels hopeless, being in a shitty place right now I know it's super difficult, but we have to believe it will get better, and we have to want that for ourselves ❤
 
G

Goingback1

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
49
Location
Regina Saskatchewan
Well, the meds only do half the work, they're helpful when they work, making it easier for us to also do our part in our mental health. I think you will find the right one for you though! :D
If you're not seeing a psychologist, I advise you to do that too, I used to think they were bullshit but I finally found a good one :) It can feel great to just talk our hearts out with no judgment
It's extremely tiring and frightening to be in your situation, and it's hard to get out of it. May I also advise you to try out some calming binaural beats? You can find those on youtube, the music is relaxing and the comments are very positive and supportive. You could also try to go on runs or do any sort of exercise to get rid of all that anxious energy :)
I know it feels hopeless, being in a shitty place right now I know it's super difficult, but we have to believe it will get better, and we have to want that for ourselves ❤
i plan to. i have a doctors appointment coming up so ill ask to try something else. once i get my head straight i will try therapy. cant go to it now my head is spinning to much. its a waiting game
 
Catty5

Catty5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 7, 2020
Messages
3,890
Location
USA
Hello
Hello
I was like you when my depression and anxiety were so awful. I was unable to see the world as I used to do. I know I was dissociated, depersonalized and derealized. I went to inpatient. I suffered so much anxiety.
But it’s been very slowly getting better with SSRI but i’m still not who I was before. It takes time for a brain to recover once it got to that point.
 
G

Goingback1

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 25, 2020
Messages
49
Location
Regina Saskatchewan
Hello
Hello
I was like you when my depression and anxiety were so awful. I was unable to see the world as I used to do. I know I was dissociated, depersonalized and derealized. I went to inpatient. I suffered so much anxiety.
But it’s been very slowly getting better with SSRI but i’m still not who I was before. It takes time for a brain to recover once it got to that point.
mental health is a crisis this country needs help with. its taken control of me infact the only thing ill watch on tv or youtube is the TV show itnervention. because the people on that show go through mental problems like depression and anxiety and without the drug to numb the feeling they are freeking out just like me. even tho i dont have an addiction problem. but watching the show is somehow comforting to know im not the only one. what was your derealization like and depersonalization?
 
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