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I'm stuck, and I don't know what to do

K

Kit73

New member
Joined
Apr 16, 2019
Messages
1
Location
United States
Hey all, this is my first post.

I'm stuck.

I have this friend who is suicidal, has anxiety attacks daily, has a eating disorder, and I'm pretty sure they are being abused by their mom.

I'm the only one they have told all of this to. Sure, they have a therapist who they talk to, but they have repeatedly told me I'm the only one they tell the truth to.

I think they have told someone about the abuse, I just don't know if that person realized how bad it is.

FYI, we are both teens.

We were texting today and my friend was doing their usual thing, "I can't do this, I'm a failure, I'm gonna be kicked out of school, I should just die, I don't care about myself, etc." Then they apologized over, and over, and over again, saying "I'm so sorry, your not a therapist, you shouldn't have to deal with me, I'm sorry...". I texted back, "No, it's okay. I'm bored and this is better than homework." In truth, I had mountains of homework yet to start, I was on the verge of a panic attack myself, I had only gotten three hours of sleep the night before, and I wanted more than anything to tell them I couldn't deal with this anymore.

But I didn't.

I sat there and gave my advice, doing everything I could.

Then I turned off my phone, sat down, and started crying.

Then I got up, turned my phone back on, and did it for another friend.

I'm stuck in a cycle, and I don't know what to do.

-Kit
 
Lunar Lady

Lunar Lady

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 19, 2019
Messages
3,205
Location
UK
Hello Kit

You sound like a lovely, warm and compassionate person.

It's a difficult thing to learn but it is a good thing to help people but not good to absorb their problems...that doesn't help them and it doesn't help you.

Next time, just be firm and tell your friend her therapist is paid to listen and advise - and you can't do anything to help. Guide the conversation towards something else - if your friend is consumed with her own problems and isn't considerate towards you, then you're doing all the giving.

Lots of love to you xxx
 
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