
Ludo
New member
Founding Member
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2007
- Messages
- 2
I have a question for you good folk ... how do you resolve the internal quandry's one experiences, when caring for a family member has stopped being rewarding?
How do you overcome those feelings of irritation when your mentally ill charge decides to completely disrobe, resulting in you having to help him dress for the umpteenth time that morning (because he puts things on backwards & upside down etc), just when you really need to leave the house for work?
How do you supress the urge to shout when you have been woken up for the fifth or sixth time in the night, by him banging on the walls with whatever heavy object he can find in his bedroom, when you're tired and have to get up to do a full time job in the morning?
How do you cope with the desire to walk out of the front door (and to keep on walking), when you get sworn and cursed at for trying to help him remove his shoes before getting into bed?
I have been helping to care for a mentally ill family member for about three years now. We're only a small family so my husband and I have quite a lot to cope with. The other part of the family (who look after our man during the day) have their own health worries and are trying to negotiate days off in the form of additional care from Social Services during the day. My husband and I work full time so we don't get any benefit from these arrangements. If anything, they make our lives more stressful!
I guess I'm just feeling a bit downhearted because someone asked me how much time I get off from caring and my answer was six hours on a Saturday. I was shocked to realise that I was actually happy about that - must be the boiling frog syndrome!
I'm probably only just looking for a place to vent. This is my first post but I've read the forum for a while. Everyone seems quite nice and I'm sure at least some of you have also struggled with emotions versus responsibility. I would be interested to hear your views.
How do you overcome those feelings of irritation when your mentally ill charge decides to completely disrobe, resulting in you having to help him dress for the umpteenth time that morning (because he puts things on backwards & upside down etc), just when you really need to leave the house for work?
How do you supress the urge to shout when you have been woken up for the fifth or sixth time in the night, by him banging on the walls with whatever heavy object he can find in his bedroom, when you're tired and have to get up to do a full time job in the morning?
How do you cope with the desire to walk out of the front door (and to keep on walking), when you get sworn and cursed at for trying to help him remove his shoes before getting into bed?
I have been helping to care for a mentally ill family member for about three years now. We're only a small family so my husband and I have quite a lot to cope with. The other part of the family (who look after our man during the day) have their own health worries and are trying to negotiate days off in the form of additional care from Social Services during the day. My husband and I work full time so we don't get any benefit from these arrangements. If anything, they make our lives more stressful!
I guess I'm just feeling a bit downhearted because someone asked me how much time I get off from caring and my answer was six hours on a Saturday. I was shocked to realise that I was actually happy about that - must be the boiling frog syndrome!
I'm probably only just looking for a place to vent. This is my first post but I've read the forum for a while. Everyone seems quite nice and I'm sure at least some of you have also struggled with emotions versus responsibility. I would be interested to hear your views.