Saf and sound
- Dec 16, 2014
I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. Whenever I'm in a situation where I get to be part of a group and interact with people I screw things up by feeling unwanted, judged,etc... even when people do seem to like me I end up ruining everything. A while ago I had problems and my colleagues helped me a great deal. I even overheard them saying how they felt sorry for me and wanted to help me. I know how STUPID that sounds but I got so embarrassed I ended up acting weirder than I ever have around them. I feel so bad now. I am so paranoid ! Whenever I make a small mistake I feel so guilty it keeps me awake at night. For example, last time, a colleague misunderstood something that I said and got offended. I didn't get the chance to talk to him about it and it would look weird to do so now. My sister told me I shouldn't care about it as it wasn't what I meant to say. I should just act natural, do something nice for him so that he knows I'm not a bad person and that's it. But I can't, I wish things were that easy.. I care waaaayy too much what people think of me and CANNOT just let it go. How do I start living for myself ?