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Im so desperate for help with my hair 😭

Broken80

Broken80

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Apr 11, 2021
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3
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Canada
I hope it's ok to post this here. I'm so embarrassed and ashamed so I'll keep things short.
I have an extreme case of hair depression.
After domestic violence of 5 years ended with him being arrested and then released, my bank account was cleaned out. I couldnt afford to eat, let alone shampoo. I left my hair up in a bun & suffered in silence.
My mother has cancer so I chose to not tell her about his arrest and my money.
My one and only pet then died, my cousin passed away very unexpected and i had just spoken to him hours prior.
I have gone without normal things like clean laundry and normal hair for a year.
My hair is extremely long, extremely thick. And hard as a rock, now that i have some money to spend to fix it.
But no regular detangler is going to help me.
I'm far too embarrassed to even show my hairdresser (plus we're on lockdown and she works from clients homes so shes not even working currently)
I am so hoping this forum can relate & shed even a little hope on my poor head. 😭 thank you
 
Tawny

Tawny

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Is it possible to cut it very very short and let it grow back healthy?

It is a perfect time of year to have shorter hair and within a few months, you will have enough regrowth for it to look very nice.

There are so many beautiful head scarves now due to there being many people having lost hair due to chemo or alopecia. There are soft hat/scarves that fit on your head like a beanie but are soft and stretchy, with decorations.
 
Tawny

Tawny

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If you do a search on that well known online shopping site ;) chemo headwear, there are some pretty things you can wear. Lots of people who don't have cancer wear them now.
 
Broken80

Broken80

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Is it possible to cut it very very short and let it grow back healthy?

It is a perfect time of year to have shorter hair and within a few months, you will have enough regrowth for it to look very nice.

There are so many beautiful head scarves now due to there being many people having lost hair due to chemo or alopecia. There are soft hat/scarves that fit on your head like a beanie but are soft and stretchy, with decorations.

If I do, I'd be cutting it to my scalp. Bc it's been up in a bun. 💔
 
B

BoutonLune

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Have you tried one of these?

detangle brush.jpg

I know how bad your hair must be, but with washing and conditioning, plus using this type of detangle brush with persistence you may eventually get most if not all tangles, knots and masses out. It might hurt and you will probably pull hair out. It may take a few attempts but maybe worth a go?

If it is really bad you will have to alternate between using the brush and pulling hair apart with fingers.
 
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

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Apr 9, 2011
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40,112
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Magical fairy wonderland xxxx
my hair wasn't cut for years due to me not going out ,i looked on google and found a lovely mobile hairdresser who has now cut my hair a number of times
honestly it was so matted and tangled ,but after about an hour she combed it out
my hair was really really bad but now its beautiful ,your hair can be beautiful again too x
 
JessisMe

JessisMe

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Feb 27, 2020
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Nashua NH
I used canola oil and a brush in my hair.
It kept it moisturized and shiny. I have very course, dry hair. I wonder if coating your hair with canola oil or some other vegetable type oil would help to detangle your hair some? It might be worth a try. xo, j
 
S

SunnyDaze

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Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Hi,
Hope you get it sorted. I'd try a detangling conditioner then deep cleansing shampoo.
You will probably need to do a few times.
Lots of hugs, good luck.
I'm so sorry this has happened to you.
 
A_Wilted_Daisy

A_Wilted_Daisy

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Soak your hair in oil overnight. Coconut oil is great for hair. Google it! In fact, Google tips and tricks to fix hard, matted hair. Hopefully you'll find helpful advice. :flowers:
 
D

DimpleDebz

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May 4, 2021
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42
Location
Munich
I had the same problem. Was severly depressed for a year and my afro hair turned to dreadlocks. I legit sat in the bath for 3 hours the first time detangling with a moisture conditioner (add honey and sunflower oil for slip). It wasn't all detangled the first time but I just worked on it the next time I conditioned and so on. It's been three months lol and I still have one or two knotted roots but I just co-wash alot, put it in 2 buns in the shower and go 😊
 

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