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Im planning again

wollie

wollie

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Sep 29, 2019
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Location
warwick
You know what its like I dare say we have all made plans, but I cant get it out of my head, I have worked it out to the minutest detail and its frightening, I dont want to but it is drawing me in, how to stop this crazyness.
 
R_Sxo

R_Sxo

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Apr 24, 2017
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Heya :) stay strong, we're here with you and care about you x happy to chat if you want?
 
AdamP72

AdamP72

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Jan 16, 2020
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126
Location
Memphis TN, center of the musical universe
You know what its like I dare say we have all made plans, but I cant get it out of my head, I have worked it out to the minutest detail and its frightening, I dont want to but it is drawing me in, how to stop this crazyness.
Hey Wollie. I certainly don’t have any magical answers but I’ve definitely been where you are. Reaching out as you did is one of the biggest things I know to do.

The last time I felt that stuff getting serious, it scared the shit out of me. I actually checked myself into in-patient treatment for a few days. It really helped to calm things down & I felt a hell of a lot better afterward. Sounds drastic but it was hugely helpful for me.
 
wollie

wollie

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Sep 29, 2019
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Location
warwick
Its 5/30 in the mornning and my head is racing with these thoughts, I cant sleep for them.
 
A

Autumnwinter

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Joined
Feb 14, 2020
Messages
7
Location
Uk
You arent alone many of us have been there. I get images in my head of ways to do it and also a physical pull inside me to do them which at times is very hard to ignore.

Sometimes I just work on making it through the hour or the day. I try distract myself as I know the urge will go eventually. Watch something funny on youtube, draw, write down how I feel, go for a run, throw stuff basically anything to take my mind off things.

What stops me is knowing there might be nothing on the other side so as much as life can be rubbish I want to stay here for as long as I can as the alternative is no better.

Honestly sometimes in those moments I feel 100% crazy and it's kinda scary but they do pass and the urges are then easier to ignore and the images not as often.
 
wollie

wollie

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Sep 29, 2019
Messages
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Location
warwick
How are you feeling now Woolie?
Quite ill. I only got about 3 hrs sleep last night, Iv been doing my charity work today and I just about got through it, if only I could get a 2 hrs quiet I would be happy.
Thanks for asking Mal.
 
A

AppletreeConfusion

Member
Joined
Jan 16, 2020
Messages
19
Location
UK
I know exactly how you feel, I was doing so well, but last week was terrible and ended with me thinking about self harm again, in the moment I took a mini-overdoes because I was basically just so sick of the way I was feeling and wanted to see if it would make me feel better or worse, becuae I had this constant, severe, squeezing emotional pain in my stomach heart and chest that was impossible to ignore - I just wanted the pain to stop. The pills actually calmed me down and today I'm not feeling so hopeless.

I don't think it was anything to do with valentines day, it's just everything my life is a mess and that is the way my body reacts, I need to do something about it. I would previously get intrusive thoughts of harming myself that was hard to fight against, and I've been there with the plans. Quite often it is just about weathering the storm, and after some time I'm often feeling much better for a bit but it's really inconsistent atm.

I know the feeling all too well, and I realise it isn't easy to ignore and be normal when it's so severe and effecting sleep.
 
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