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I'm pathetic for not being able to drive

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english rose

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Never have I felt so stupid & humiliated about not being able to drive as last night: My fiance had a 'funny turn', he was having heart palpitations & he was cold & shivering, I touched his hands & they were freezing. He asked me to phone for an ambulance, I phoned & they were asking me lots of questions, then they ended the conversation & phoned me back, they said he wasn't seriously ill enough to send an ambulance for & said he should make his own way to A & E, I told them I can't drive, they said they'd send a mini cab, the mini cab got lost & was delayed by a long time (at least the NHS paid for it). By the time we got there he was feeling better - the ECG they did showed a faster than normal heart rate, but if it had been done an hour earlier then the result would probably have been off the chart, we were there for nearly 5 hours, we got a cab home & that cost £15. He is going to his GP tomorrow, the A & E doctor has written to his GP instructing them to do a 24 hour ECG.

I actually took the driving test 3 times & failed 3 times (last time 22 years ago), in a manual; if I could afford lessons then I'd learn again in an automatic, but I dread to think how much driving lessons cost these days, I think I could stand a chance in an automatic but not a manual, my fiance's car is a manual so an automatic licence would've been no good to me last night.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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I don't think your pathetic for not being able to drive.
Whenever someone I know tells me they can't drive, it's not something I ever judge them for. There are a whole number of reasons why people don't drive - some very admirable (being 'green').
So don't go calling yourself pathetic, because you're really not.

Lessons probably do cost a lot and it's not easy to pass a test. I'm not sure if you live in a busy area or a more rural location, but wherever you live there are different challenges. Also, I think a lot of people find on the day of the test that nerves get the better of them and it's not that they don't have a good ability to drive.
I know that whenever i'm being observed doing something I mess up - even when I fill out the back of a prescription form. I know my address and the date, but because the assistant is watching me, I always get it wrong. :doh:

I hope your husband is ok, by the way. Don't beat yourself up over last night.
Oh and who knows, it may even have been better that you got a taxi to the hospital. It's not a sensible idea to drive when you're in a rush and you're worrying about a loved one anyway.
 

MarlieeB

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I can't drive.

My experience ended up with a little crash.... It seems I couldn't do corners and the ways driving instructors work does not work for me, I need them to be gentle with me.

I even tried to get a mophead which ended with me crashing into a tree for not braking when I was meant to. The instructor was a total bastard so yeah, never gonna attempt again.

It can be a pain in the arse but with how I'm feeling at the moment I'm glad I don't drive.
 
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english rose

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I have got very bad hand-eye coordination & that's why I need an automatic as opposed to a manual.
 
Toasted Crumpet

Toasted Crumpet

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I hope your husband will be ok. It must have been a scary time for you but it's not your fault you can't drive and lots of people can't for various reasons.

I can't drive either - never had the money for lessons.

My mum said I should be able to drive as I'd seen her do it enough times. This doesn't make sense to me as she never tried to teach me.

I think I am too stupid to do it anyway.

My partner says I wouldn't be able to as I am too anxious.

My hand-eye co-ordination is also crap. I could never catch/hit a ball in sports.

They say people without cars are fitter. But I guess if someone lives in a rural area with poor public transport it's going to be a problem. I'd like to move to such an area but I would need to be able to drive.
 
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english rose

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I hope your husband will be ok. It must have been a scary time for you but it's not your fault you can't drive and lots of people can't for various reasons.

I can't drive either - never had the money for lessons.

My mum said I should be able to drive as I'd seen her do it enough times. This doesn't make sense to me as she never tried to teach me.

I think I am too stupid to do it anyway.

My partner says I wouldn't be able to as I am too anxious.

My hand-eye co-ordination is also crap. I could never catch/hit a ball in sports.

They say people without cars are fitter. But I guess if someone lives in a rural area with poor public transport it's going to be a problem. I'd like to move to such an area but I would need to be able to drive.
My mum can't drive & has never had even one single lesson, she points this out to me when I beat myself up about not being able to drive, however it's not the same thing as obviously she's from an older generation, she turned 17 in 1961 - back then a lot less people drove, & also driving was a male rather than female thing, unlike in 1989 when I turned 17 & it was a unisex thing.

I would love to live in a rural area too, but as you said, without a car you're stuffed.

School sports were a nightmare for me - complete humiliation.
 
SarahD

SarahD

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Well I thought I was the only person in the country left who couldn't drive!

I did have lessons... but I don't have any natural road sense. I felt quite relieved when I gave up the lessons. But I have still always wished I persevered. There are so many bad drivers. I would have been just one more...
 
Toasted Crumpet

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My mum can't drive & has never had even one single lesson, she points this out to me when I beat myself up about not being able to drive, however it's not the same thing as obviously she's from an older generation, she turned 17 in 1961 - back then a lot less people drove, & also driving was a male rather than female thing, unlike in 1989 when I turned 17 & it was a unisex thing.

I would love to live in a rural area too, but as you said, without a car you're stuffed.

School sports were a nightmare for me - complete humiliation.
Ooh you roughly same age as me. When I was 17, most people I knew got driving lessons for their birthday and then a second hand car for their 18th. I guess they had more money than us. My mum never offered to teach me, but then given how she was prone to ranting and raving if I didn't pick something up straight away, this is probably just as well.
 
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english rose

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Ooh you roughly same age as me. When I was 17, most people I knew got driving lessons for their birthday and then a second hand car for their 18th. I guess they had more money than us. My mum never offered to teach me, but then given how she was prone to ranting and raving if I didn't pick something up straight away, this is probably just as well.
I had to pay for my own lessons from part-time jobs back when I actually used to work. There was no chance of anyone ever buying me a car. Once my dad told me that his son & daughter with his second wife only managed to pass their tests because he took them out practising inbetween lessons - I wish I'd sarcastically responded well there was nobody to do that with me; my mum's husband was too mean to get third party insurance in order to do that.
 
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ramboghettouk

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i wish i could drive maggie thatcher said if she sees a man of over 25 on the bus she sees a man who's failed, as i said to one shrink i couldn't hide i was on the bus coming to the appt

They've closed most of the a and e s in my area the ones that are left are quite a distance, how i'd get there if they decided i wasn't ill enough for an ambulance, they should understand some don't have acess to transport and provide it there and back, your reluctant to pay high taxi fares if your poor as well
 
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english rose

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i wish i could drive maggie thatcher said if she sees a man of over 25 on the bus she sees a man who's failed, as i said to one shrink i couldn't hide i was on the bus coming to the appt

They've closed most of the a and e s in my area the ones that are left are quite a distance, how i'd get there if they decided i wasn't ill enough for an ambulance, they should understand some don't have acess to transport and provide it there and back, your reluctant to pay high taxi fares if your poor as well
Where I live you can no longer use cash on buses, now there is a bus that takes you from just outside my place to very near the hospital, however my fiance wouldn't have been able to get on the bus as he didn't have his card with him (he rarely uses it as he's got a car). I've got a half price discount card because I'm on benefits (well I was when I renewed it a couple of months ago). When we left the hospital I think the buses hadn't started to run yet as it was a Sunday morning & the first bus is later on a Sunday than other days, it was about 5:30am.
 
Jaminacaranda

Jaminacaranda

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Well I thought I was the only person in the country left who couldn't drive!

I did have lessons... but I don't have any natural road sense. I felt quite relieved when I gave up the lessons. But I have still always wished I persevered. There are so many bad drivers. I would have been just one more...
I don't drive either and I'm 63! I had 8 lessons 2 years ago (my first experience of driving a car) and although I didn't do that badly, I never felt comfortable with it, dreaded my next lesson for days on end and gave up. My partner and I live in a very rural area - it's an hour's drive to the nearest hospital - and he has already had one heart attack so yes - like you - I feel guilty that if the same thing happened again, I'd be no use :( But you're not alone, and your responsibility in life does not depend on you having a driving licence! If that was the case, they should damn well teach driving in schools or make driving lessons free!
 
vanish

vanish

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I can't drive either. I suffer from poor concentration, always have. For some reasons with the medication I am on, it is even worse these days. I have also created a phobia about driving, like I am going to hit someone and kill them or something. I'm not sure if I will ever get over that fear.
 
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english rose

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I don't feel that I'm alert enough to drive, I'm not ever properly awake, I pump myself up with energy drinks & caffeine tablets just to be able to walk my dog & tidy up & load the dishwasher so on.
 
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ChesireCat

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We learn to drive here in school - when you turn 16. I'm a terrible driver though. Luckily, I don't drive too much nowadays, so the people are safe.:peace:
 
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