I'm new here and have GAD/Agoraphobia/Depression

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George1991

New member
Joined
Aug 23, 2018
Messages
1
Location
Houston, Texas, USA
#1
Hello everyone,

I've been looking at some posts anonymously and decided to give these forums a go.
I've suffered with anxiety since about 2011-2012 (maybe 2013). I had my first panic attack on a car ride that was meant to go out of state and about 20-45 minutes in the ride I started to feel ill and nauseous among other symptoms (not knowing what it was) so I went home and stayed there (was going to move to Texas with my mother and her new boyfriend). I later was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression and was prescribed many medications throughout the years.

Fast forward to now, 2018, I'm in Texas living with my Mother and she now has a different boyfriend (more nice and helpful which is better for her). I managed to take a plane to Texas and get in the car and go live with her and some of my other siblings (I can't even remember how I managed to do that, I also managed to go from Michigan to San Francisco, California for a few days with my older brother before I left to Texas with little/no anxiety but I was on Valium I believe).

I'm currently on Clonazepam (2mg a day/4mg a day if I feel like I need extra).
I've been on this medication for 2-3 years now and took it on as "as needed" basis and self-medicated and now I'm on a "daily basis" and my doctor went with it because it was helping (now it's not helping so much, in fact I've pretty much built a tolerance to it, but not 100% tolerance). I want to get off of it with minimal/to no side effects and somehow get better without medication.

Anyone here ever take clonazepam or any other kind of benzodiazepine? Any advice would be crucial and helpful :)

I'm honestly at my wits end, I'm forgetful and I'm scared to go to a local grocery store that's not even a mile away in my brother's car (as a passenger). I am able to walk outside but I'm scared to go to certain places or stray too far from home (that's the biggest issue here). I don't like being away from home but it makes no sense because just a few months ago I could go to the mall and I even went downtown (20+ miles), now I struggle to go even a mile or half a mile.

The mind is a weird thing, and I apologize for the long story.

I feel like anxiety RULES my life and it's frustrating (I get nauseated the most out of all of the symptoms and it sucks so I avoid places or hide).

Can anyone recommend anything that may help? I know exposure is the way to go but it's hard to get out when you feel so crappy with these symptoms even though logically I know it's anxiety..

Thank you for reading,

~George :unsure:
 
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LikeMinds

Active member
Joined
Aug 26, 2018
Messages
27
Location
North Carolina
#2
Hey, George, have you thought about seeking help from a different doctor/therapist? It sounds like the treatment plan you are currently on isn't working for you. If you are mainly seeing psychiatrist, they will tend to go to medicine first. But medicine sometimes only dulls the symptoms without really allowing us to build the skills we need to function better. You might want (if you are not now) to see a psychologist who specializes in panic disorder and issues related.

You may have already thought about this and, if so, I am sorry. This is just a thought that came to mind as I was reading your post. In any case, I'm glad you're here. I can't offer you much in the way of medical or clinical help, but I understand first hand your comment about how the mind is a weird thing. Mine frequently plays tricks on me even though I have wrestled with it, gone to therapy, and taken medications for over 25 years.

For what it's worth, George, I stand with you and hope you find some answers. Surely there is some mental health professional in a city as big as Houston who has an answer for you.

One more thing. If you want to find options for doctors and therapists, one place you might turn is the local NAMI affiliate (National Alliance on Mental Illness). NAMI is a great organization made up of people like us and our families. It's job is to advocate for us and our needs. I'm sure there is at least one local NAMI chapter in Houston. You might check the internet and see if there is somebody there to talk to. In addition to giving you information on possible doctors/therapists, you might find that they have some support groups that you might enjoy. I have frequently attended my local NAMI support group. Everyone there knows what I'm going through without my having to do all the explaining, etc., etc. That's because they are there, too.

Just some thoughts, George.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
9,380
Location
England
#3
Hi George,
Welcome to the forum,
Sorry your poorly, have you ever tried any therapy?
Hope you get better very soon.
If you want to come off a drug best to do very slowly and with the help of your dr.
Take care
 

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