I'm feeling like a fraud because I feel like there is nothing wrong with me.

[Zoe1]

I'm on quite alot of medication for psychosis and depression
and maybe its working very well
because I feel like there is nothing wrong with me !

I can even remember a time
when I said I would make up my illness
so that I didnt have to go to work

some years later I was in hospital after self harming
but then maybe I made myself ill
by making it up

although I did have anorexia
before I made up the depression

 

[Fairy Lucretia]

you are not a fraud ,the whole point of medication is that it is supposed to ease symptoms ,so maybe your's is what would be the point of being on it if it didn't help at all?

it is ok to feel ok sometimes you know ,you can still be poorly if you have some good days
and if you were diagnosed with anorexia and depression you have obviously been unwell and if are still on medication probably still are
love Lu xxx

 

[NWiddi]

I feel like a fraud at times too Zoe, if I never told you I hear a voice that isn't my own or told you where I believe they come from you'd never know anything was different about me.

So far with my ESA forms I've had help filling them in from my wonderful mental health team but I'll be soon off their books (my 3 years are nearly up) and put on a long term team and I don't know if they'll help me so I may be on my own filling them in, and god help me if they ever call me in for a face-to-face. I can see the result coming in now... nil point!

 

[Zoe1]

thankyou Fairy

maybe its like a ' voices ' thing
like for some people its persistent thoughts

and my mind keep telling me I'm a fraud

 

[Zoe1]

NWiddi I have never heard of a rule
where they discarge you after 3 year
I have been told they will never discharge me

also in my town there is the NHS service
and also a ' wellbeing hub '
and both places have help with benefits forms

so you might be entitled to more help

 

[midnightphoenix]

Zoe is not a fraud

 

[Zoe1]

thankyou midnights

 

[NWiddi]

I have never heard of a rule
where they discarge you after 3 year

It's an Early Intervention Team for Psychosis that I'm currently under and they have a 3-5 year cut-off period depending on how you're doing, after that I get put on to a long term team where I can still access a doctor in case I want a medication review (I hope) and I should still be getting check-ups at the clinic every couple of months for blood work, ECG's etc. but apart from that I don't know what services they provide.

They certainly don't do groups like my current EIT does, social, walking and pool groups which I'll really miss, it's been nice having somewhere to go three times a week and meeting people who've been through the same as me.

My care coordinator, a support worker and the vocational worker are all coming to see me on the 2nd of October, I've never had all three at the same time come to visit so it must be to tell me I'm off the team.

 

[Zoe1]

oh NWiddi I really do feel for you with that
it has happened to me in the days before I was hospitalised
I begged and pleaded with them not to discharge me
to no avail, and I even went to the Ombudsman about it

after I had hurt myself and been hospitalised
now they are not discharging me
but it has to come to this ?

I dont think its OK to take away all your support and social groups
can you seek advice from an advocate or the CAB ?

you can use the story of my experiences if you like

 

[TulipIceCream]

I also feel like a fraud sometimes. After I got really bad I was in therapy and almost went back to the mental ward but I complied with meds and therapy. I worked hard to rearrange my life and only take on minimum stress activities. I feel ok. Even happy but on the one hand I feel ok but the other I am totally medicated and also living in such a structured life I should not have too much stress.

My fiance says I don't seem disabled and seems maybe skeptical or disturbed that I am on disability. Me and my therapist know the truth. I was even talking to my therapist about this and she said,"it's normal to have good and bad days" I wonder what people who know my benefits and diagnosis think when they see me smiling at something guess it's not their business

 

[Zoe1]

n yeah I do amazing things actually
that people might be suspicious about
if they knew I was on benefits

but I couldn't organise myself
to be financially self supporting
and I wouldn't have the motivation to do it

im glad you have happy days Tulip
its amazing isn't it !

 

[vanish]

Sometimes I feel like a fraud too, Zoe.
My support worker said to me I’m unusually high functioning for someone with psychosis. My old psychiatrist told me I couldn’t possibly be schizophrenic, I was too high functioning. My current psychiatrist had to let me down easy when he told me my diagnosis.
I say nobody would truly make up a serious mental health condition to the extent they could die. I mean, I can’t think of anyone who’d fake mental illness or accentuate symptoms. I don’t think we’re really fraudulent, despite having good days at times.

 

[Zoe1]

my OT said yesterday that I am high functioning
but I'm not employed though
I have ME as well as MH

I think he meant it genuinely though
whereas sometimes they say these things
because they dont have the staff to work with us
and are prioritising emergency cases

maybe thats where this feeling comes from

 

[ramboghettouk]

my gp arranged for an acupuncturist to come to his surgery, you had to pay, i was about the only one who used her, heard her talking to my gp, my gp was saying "why because he doesn't look mentally ill, have you ever worked in a mental hospital"

 

[ramboghettouk]

i don't feel a fraud, whether i accept i'm ill, thats definition and theres szatse arguing mental illness doesn't exist, whether benefits should be given solely for illness, i think black people or gay people who find it difficult getting or holding down work due to prdujice should be entitled to a bit of understanding from the dwp

i have no doubt if i came off these drugs, and i've seen people try, i'd be in a state i'd call illness