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I'm a magnet for confrontation please help!

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Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
Hi all, I have been plagued my whole life with social confrontations from strangers on the street. I'm a nice guy who has good ethics and manners. I'm kind and respectful. I'm the guy who would hold the door open you . I don't start trouble but trouble always wants to start things with me. So.. so tired of it. I definitely don't get what I give or throw out into the world. From strangers wanting to start something by staring, constant tailgating and just general rudeness and intimidating on some level by others. It usually starts when the world has left me alone for a while and I in the middle of something positive and rewarding...then the subhumans return. At H Depot the other day walked up to one of the spots where the flooring adhesive is and some scourge subhuman guy next to me decides to walk directly into the direction im looking at seeing what's on the shelf and stops. He did it on purpose stopped with his back to me crossed his arms and stared at the shelf. I was excited about redoing our bathroom floor and then this piece of sh.. decides he wants a confrontation. I didn't say anything and regret it now. I just moved to this so called nice small town and decided to bite my tongue. This is just one of many experiences on average 2-3 times a month or more. Just constant disrespect from the sub human. It's like I live in this really ****ed up Matrix where the agent smiths come out of no where and have fun making me miserable. It's like the gods are testing me. Didn't used to get confronted by other guys my size. Then one time I backed down out a confrontation with another yet another a hole my size because I didn't feeling going to jail. After that it has been non stop confrontations with guys my size and never before this. The gods are having fun with this one arent they? It's all a rotten to the core universe we live in preying on our insecurities. Not the loving caring god but an evil one...if there is one at all anyway. At least I truly hope there isnt. I know it sounds crazy but I'm sick and tired of it. I'm not oversensitive I just expect better. Do any of you struggle with this constant harassment? Thanks
 
S

Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
Even my own wife and family doesn't support me. Thinks I am weak for not saying anything sometimes. It's just the proffesion I'm in doesn't allow people with violent records on there sites. All I need is an arrest record for defending my self and there goes my future permanently. The house, cars everything. It's probably hard for all of you to understand stand. Walking away from a holes maybe the safe bet but it is painful too. It tears me up to no end.
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
17,569
Location
Nowhere
is there any way you can get some therapy Skiracer

I find the more support I can get for myself
the better people react to me

I saw myself on zoom today and I was shocked !
I had no idea that I looked confrontational !


:grouphug:
 
S

Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
is there any way you can get some therapy Skiracer

I find the more support I can get for myself
the better people react to me

I saw myself on zoom today and I was shocked !
I had no idea that I looked confrontational !


:grouphug:
Hi Zoe1, thanks for replying. I honestly don't think it's possible for a therapist or anyone to understand. How do you look confrontational?
 
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Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
I don't get a confrontational reaction from others at work. Just strangers.
 
Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
17,569
Location
Nowhere
I'm the opposite ! nice reactions from strangers
but people on courses have told me
well actually I'm not sure they have told me anything
just reacted as if I'm abrasive or something

honestly I had no idea what I sometimes look like !
 
S

Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
I have that too from time to time to. Maybe just a somber look or something and yes people take it the wrong way... personally. I don't know.

I think I am just an easy target for a holes. I must have a bullet on my forehead. Probably the way I hold myself. But that doesn't give some subhuman the right to be a d.ck I mean honestly if there were no recourse from the law or civil suit I would gladly hurt someone who was trying to start something.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
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Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
But because there always is recourse I choose not to.
 
S

siliconom

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
347
Location
Quebec
This may sound a bit harsh, but I think you might have ASD

There is a big gap between your self image and what others think of you. It's not really for you to say you're a nice guy, that has to come from others

It will do you no harm to get an evaluation. Therapy a good place to start
 
S

Skiracer321

Member
Joined
Feb 2, 2021
Messages
9
Location
Arizona
This may sound a bit harsh, but I think you might have ASD

There is a big gap between your self image and what others think of you. It's not really for you to say you're a nice guy, that has to come from others

It will do you no harm to get an evaluation. Therapy a good place to start
Yes that is quite the big stretch for a want to be therapist like yourself. I don't judge you so I don't appreciate the jerk response. My self image matches what people close to me identify with.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
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siliconom

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 24, 2021
Messages
347
Location
Quebec
I think you juzt proved my point
 
E

EclipticNight

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2020
Messages
412
Location
Orleans vermont.
Howdy friend!

Its not just you. When i was growing up my second grade teacher failed me when i didnt fail. My mother flipped her shit when she realized it. All my life ive been blamed, laughed at and attacked mentally and on occasion physically. I to always minded my own business, never started anything and was polite.

Before i go on a note. When i came here to this forum i did so knowing i wanted to help everyone no matter what if i was able. I have a unique view of life and some strange mental issues that come together in ways that are often socially bad. That said...

For the first time my advice is to be a total asshole. Not to everyone, start off nice but when people attack for no reason give them some attitude. When some rando starts arguing ask if he wants a ladder. When he is confused say so you can get over it. Thats not where that goes comes with i put it here so thats where it goes. Tell them to fuck off. I mean there are so many things you can say. I used to say i hope they fell down stairs. To really nasty ones meet that level.

Why such dark advice? It worked for me. I found that the darker i got the more people seem to reconsider saying something. Its like they sense it. When i gave in and just became them when dealing with them they backed off.

Now if your wife gets upset she has to choose, polite or stick up for yourself. Just remember to only be this way to those who go after you first. Your never starting the conflict but you can finish it. I think you'll find becoming them can be rather fun as well. As a side note, if it needs to be said dont attack anyone physically. Be a smartass not a bully.
 
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