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Illness impact on family.

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robotgirl

Active member
Joined
Jun 26, 2014
Messages
26
I'm 31 and was living in London independently and was on a low level antidepressant and was more or less happy. Then 8 months ago out of no where I got this horrific anxiety and depression and had something of a breakdown and couldn't cope on my own. I had to come up to Yorkshire to live with my mum. It should have been a month or two but my recovery didn't go to plan and I'm still here. I have my place in London still and plan to return when I can.

In the meantime my amazing mum is having to deal with my older brother and sister who have always relied on my mum financially and emotionally kicking off. Yesterday my sister called my mum and said that she resents me taking up all my mums time and resents my being here and is jealous of me. This has upset me greatly because I'm already doing everything in my power to try get back to London.
 
katya

katya

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 4, 2013
Messages
2,052
Location
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I'm 31 and was living in London independently and was on a low level antidepressant and was more or less happy. Then 8 months ago out of no where I got this horrific anxiety and depression and had something of a breakdown and couldn't cope on my own. I had to come up to Yorkshire to live with my mum. It should have been a month or two but my recovery didn't go to plan and I'm still here. I have my place in London still and plan to return when I can.

In the meantime my amazing mum is having to deal with my older brother and sister who have always relied on my mum financially and emotionally kicking off. Yesterday my sister called my mum and said that she resents me taking up all my mums time and resents my being here and is jealous of me. This has upset me greatly because I'm already doing everything in my power to try get back to London.
I'm so sorry your sister is being insensitive to your needs right now. Sometimes people have breakdowns and have to live with their parents. I'm in the same situation right now. It's hard to live in London, so it's totally understandable that you'd need a bit of time to get yourself together. Please remember that this is not your fault, your sister's resentment should - really - have never reached you or your mum's ears and that you're doing all the right things right now. It is perfectly okay to need help from time to time and your sister will just have to be jealous.

Have you spoken to your mum about how you're feeling? Hopefully she'll be able to reassure you of all of this.

:hug1:
 
R

robotgirl

Active member
Joined
Jun 26, 2014
Messages
26
I'm so sorry your sister is being insensitive to your needs right now. Sometimes people have breakdowns and have to live with their parents. I'm in the same situation right now. It's hard to live in London, so it's totally understandable that you'd need a bit of time to get yourself together. Please remember that this is not your fault, your sister's resentment should - really - have never reached you or your mum's ears and that you're doing all the right things right now. It is perfectly okay to need help from time to time and your sister will just have to be jealous.

Have you spoken to your mum about how you're feeling? Hopefully she'll be able to reassure you of all of this.

:hug1:
Thanks :) It's difficult cos my mum and I are basically living on top of each other in her one bedroom flat. She's never moaned once, even though I've more or less taken over her life. We're going to visit London in a couple of weeks as I haven't been back to my place since September last year. Thankfully I live with two friends who are very supportive and have my room for when I feel better.

My sister has her own issues which she hasn't faced so its difficult at the best of times but to have her voice all my suspicions is just horrible. How am I supposed to be around her now? knowing how she feels?. I think she imagines I'm here on some holiday loving it, when I've been suicidal at times and only now can consider the possibility of returning home at some point. Before it was just not possible to even consider.

I think my brother and sister always see me as the 'favourite' etc but when it comes down to it, I don't borrow money, get into trouble etc like they do. This is the most I've needed from my mum as I've always been independent and living away. I'm angry that for the first time in my life I've asked and needed help and this is how they react.
 
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