• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

If I can offer some words of wisdom for younger members: don't push people away.

I

Intareseid

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Nov 7, 2020
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Ok I'm not THAT old but still, old enough to have plenty of regrets.

But if I could go back in time and offer my younger self one piece of advice it would simply to make sure not be such an imbecile and pointlessly push so many people away.

Now, I understand how easy it is to say that and how hard it can be to not do that when you're a mess of negative and chaotic emotions and utterly confused about yourself, the world and in general all the fun that comes with mental illness.

But still, the alternative is just so much worse. I don't know exactly how but even I was at some point able to have at least a small group of close people that at least to some degree cared about me and of whom I had a positive image. But these types of issues just makes you so unstable that you end up pushing people away for one reason or another, maybe you think you'll be better off alone, maybe you feel the people you do have are not being supportive enough, maybe you're just lashing out, in the end the result is the same.

Now, I'm really not the type of person that desperately needs many others, all the time, not at all, but after years and years of emotional and mental isolation it just gets to anyone, no matter what your personality may be. I would honestly be satisfied with 1 or 2 people that I knew well enough, liked and respected and that similarly knew me and with whom I had a positive and friendly relationship and maybe once every couple of weeks just have a chat about anything really or maybe share some activity and that's it, that's all it would take for me to not be lonely anymore. But because I was so smart and wise now finding that seems like an enormous challenge that will take years, in the best possible scenario. How fun.

So I don't know much this will apply to others, but if you see yourself or your situation reflected at all in my words, please, just sit and think. No matter what, you'll likely won't be able to keep everyone around, people change, grow and move on, that's part of life, but if maybe you're not very successful in your mental struggle then you'll really want to have done everything possible to keep at least someone around.
 
Lavender_Rose

Lavender_Rose

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Joined
Apr 12, 2020
Messages
1,454
Location
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Im not that old either but id say this applies to older people too. Older adults still needs friends, ive seen older adults than me suffering because they think they don't. Good advice in general.
 
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