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I was discharged from hospital yesterday

Pixie37

Pixie37

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Nov 2, 2009
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Hiya everyone,
I was put back in hospital a week ago. My quetiapine was doubled. My nurse gave me a worksheet to do in hospital so now i understand all the emotional states i jump in and out of. My pdoc discharged me yesterday and i was sobbing cause i'm still getting suicidal and hearing voices and feels like he etc doesnt care. Dont understand last monday he was going to section me. Now he says people with bpd should only be for a short time. I almost took all of my quetipine last night.
 
maxitab

maxitab

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Sep 18, 2010
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In Devon
Pixie babes......great you are back, and greater you are still with us. Huggy hug hug hugs!
Don't leave us....I've missed you hon!
 
keepsafe

keepsafe

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Dec 15, 2008
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Hey Pixie,
Glad you are out but its not such a happy thing to hear you are still struggling - hope you will cope alright.
(((hugs)))
KS
 
amathus

amathus

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Apr 23, 2010
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goodness knows!
Glad to hear you're back home Pixie, but sorry to hear of your
probs.
You will manage to work through it, in time. Keep posting.

qf.
 
A

Allyke

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Sorry you're still struggling Pixie. It's great to see you again though! Hugs xx
 
Pixie37

Pixie37

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I dont trust my psyciatrist now. I dont want to see my nurse on Friday. Who discharges someone who is still totally suicidal and hearing voices? I am planning my death and not returning anyones texts or calls. I will not ask for help ever again.
 
dib4uk

dib4uk

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Pixie its vital that u tell someone how you feel, ask for a new pyschiartirst and nurse. please dont suffer in silence x
 
Pixie37

Pixie37

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Last night a doctor and the police came out. I'd drank a bottle of wine and was taking an overdose. Doctor was going to section me if i didnt go voluntary. I got taken back to the ward. Then a male nurse breathalised me and then said because your over the limit i can stop this interview whenever i want. I just said "Oh well i'll just go then " and i walked out and back home. I tried to commit S another way this morning.
 
A.m.b.e.r

A.m.b.e.r

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Oct 11, 2010
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London
Ahh Pixie I am so glad you were back, I was just wondering if you were okay and thats why i logged in to check the website. I am so sorry to hear that you are not doing so well. Its a real pig of the Dr's to confuse people by saying things like "we are going to section you" and then telling you you have to leave. It happened to me and to be honest I don't know if its a good idea to be discharged early when you still feel that doubt in yourself ... Stay on here and keep talking and everyone can offer you the most support. If you really don't feel right I would call the Dr or hospital and tell them you must come back in. For your own good if thats how you feel deep inside.

XXX lots of kisses ;)
 
Pixie37

Pixie37

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Sorry i'm still a mess. Thats evil my pdoc discharging me when i'm still totally suicidal with no family or friends to look after me. Its made me feel 10 times worse than i did. That my pdoc and nurses dont care that i'm suicidal. I am being treated differently cause i have BPD not bipolar or schizophrenia like my fellow patients. And my pdoc said this "i know its harsh" feel like they not hearing or caring i'm seriously ill. I've given up asking for help. :(
 
dib4uk

dib4uk

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Jul 23, 2009
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south london,england
Awww pixie im sorry that things seem pointless right about now, but the only thing that i can say is that it will improve over time. you will feel better.... i know that its not much in the words of encouragements but thats all i can say.

Its horrible when you feel soo low that nothing helps, and its horrible that your care team is not helping at all.
 
Pixie37

Pixie37

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SCOTLAND
My head has gone like this - I just want to die. This is the end of the line. Its time for me to get out of here. I just have to decide on the way i want to die. Then i'll do it when noone is worried about me and they think i'm fine. I want revenge too its payback time for all the people who've hurt me.
 
A

Allyke

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Jun 2, 2010
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Pixie, please stay safe...it sounds like this hospital have put you through hell and I can't believe they thought it was ok to dismiss you like that. I wish I could do more than say please believe that it will get better...I know that probably seems impossible at the moment...xx
 
A.m.b.e.r

A.m.b.e.r

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London
Pixie do you have an emergency contact to call on your care plan? Or how bought lying in bed having a good cry then just closing your eyes ... I know that sounds like soppy advice but sometimes when I am at my worst thats what I do, then hopefully you will just wake up tomorrow and you can contact your CPN .
 
Pixie37

Pixie37

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Location
SCOTLAND
I took the courage and phoned my advocacy worker for help this morning. I told him i've tried to commit suicide twice since Monday. He says no point in him trying to talk to my pdoc again as he is adamant hospital is not in my best interest. Advoc worker says meds don't really work for bpd and bpd is more pyscological and i should have a psycolist but i dont. I hung up the phone on him. He hasnt called back. I have given up and gone back to bed with my S thoughts all ouer the place.
 
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