I want to end it all

wolram

wolram

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 22, 2019
Messages
890
Location
Warwickshire England
#1
I have been hearing voices since 2008 and suffer from depression, Today I am at my lowest ever When I get the opportunity I plan to end my life. I think it should do the job. I have been in touch with the crisis team and they are no help.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Fairy Lucretia

Fairy Lucretia

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Apr 9, 2011
Messages
31,007
Location
Magical fairy wonderland xxxx
#2
please don't hurt yourself
if the crisis team won't listen try talking to us on the forum x

is there anyone in RL life you can call?
if you feel this bad please consider going to A&E xx
 
wolram

wolram

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 22, 2019
Messages
890
Location
Warwickshire England
#3
The thing is I have lost the will to live and I can not think of a single thing to keep me here on earth, may be heaven will be all laughter and jingle bells, I do not know but any thing must be better than this hell on earth
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
796
Location
Florida
#4
Yeah though we all suffer!!!!! Be ye not afraid and Never ever take your own life-believe it or not thoughts do change-maybe not quick enough but a better day is always coming Promise Been there at the gate of death too many times and I do know things will change Wait for the moment please please please
 
W

wisdomfromwarrior

Active member
Joined
Feb 25, 2019
Messages
28
Location
Paris
#5
Hey,

I am listening. I have the answer of it all.

I have been thru "hearing voice" and it was very painfull and i would like to die for some years.


I want you to know I am a respected engeener, I got a PhD, I got a wife (I am divorced), I have a wonderful daugther, I got a few beautiful gfs meanwhile, I have a very pleasant situation.

I am not trying to trigger jealousy in anyone! Not at all! Every day have been a struggle! I am a warrior!

I have been thru the chamanic process, I have learnt to recognize good and bad voice, I have suffered delusion 1thousand time, I know my way, I know who I am, I am aware of the roots cause and the deepest explaination.

You just need to ask me.

You do not want to kill yourself, you want to stop this mess you cannot foresee new hope to overcome. But it is possible to find new resource, new knowledge, to discover some secrets that have been messing badly with you. I did it. It's when it's the most dark that you also can unhide the most powerfull new overcome! Seriously, please brother, give my knowledge and experience a chance. I would like to chat with you and to share some of my discovers. You might just now change everything and take a new page and a new path in your life. I have guided many.

I do not sell anything, I am just me, unlucky me, which happened to make something out of it. It can be a very very great opportunity of just changing everything in your life up to something a lot better!

I have a tons of love to share.

Write me!
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
8,819
Location
England
#6
Hi,
How are you feeling today?
Here to listen anytime.
Take care
 
wolram

wolram

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 22, 2019
Messages
890
Location
Warwickshire England
#7
Hi every one
I am still very low, I am struggling to survive, my need to commit suicide is very strong
I am seeing my phyc tomorrow and just do not know what to say to him.
I must say there are some lovely people on this forum, it is the only place I have found that gives support, but all said and done I need something to hang on to something I have not found to date.
Do you give names to your voices I do mine are called shit head and brown nose, shit head because of all the filth he comes out with and brown nose because he backs it up, they want me to commit suicide, they nag and nag me to.
But what is life? I am sure I do not have one, I volunteer at a charity shop three days a week
some thing I used to enjoy but even that has lost its lustre, the rest of the week I just slob around at home, The DVLC took my licence away and I am afraid of buses so I am stuck at home.

Enough waffle, Regards to every one

Wollie.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
8,819
Location
England
#8
Hi
Sorry to hear your struggling, glad your seeing your dr soon.
Hope you get your license back soon, try not to listen to your voices.
Please don't end your life.
Life can be unkind however
Good luck for with your Drs appointment
Take care
 
C

chango

Member
Joined
Sep 6, 2018
Messages
5
#9
I hate my life on many levels and wanted to die. I am living for my wife and kids and that's pretty much it. I've decided to try to self sacrifice by constantly trying to help others in any way possible...give up my life for others because, after all, I want to give it up. It's not easy and I'm not successful at it but I thought I'd try that approach.
 
W

wisdomfromwarrior

Active member
Joined
Feb 25, 2019
Messages
28
Location
Paris
#10
Hey,

I am pretty bad. My voices has decided to push me to suicide since 3 weeks or maybe more.
Before that I was having struggle often but not very hard, would have gone for 1 week with only a few interaction 90% positive.

They say I signed my paper to hell and that my soul is out of any love and not worth God and that I am losting God for eternity.

Well.... daily shit for hearing voice. I am despair.

I just wanted to point to you that for 2005-2010 I mostly have not had any life at all, I would spend my time by smoking pot and drinking to get out of all the negativity on me.

10 years later I have a new job, new gf, new degree, new everything. My life seems a life you would finally live. That's been a very rude and agressive period where I would not have had believed in something related to hope about me, but finally it happened!

I still have very difficult time and a very cruel interaction with my voices. But things progressed meanwhile. I hope you can trust me that if you work hard enough things might evolve for you greatly.

I hope I will overcome my negative voice one day. I try to keep faith.
 
L

LoveYourself

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 14, 2018
Messages
69
#11
Hold on, be strong. You are not your voices, its all your mind and you probably know that yet still it can be very hard, i know. Do your best every moment to detach from your it, you are pure consciousness, not mind, although the mind can fool you into thinking otherwise. Every time you have a bad voice/thought etc, dont fight it, dont try to control it, watch it like you`d watch a scary or negative tv-show, with a distant impersonal approach. It might happen in your head, but that doesnt mean that it is you. Whatever the mind/brain has created and accumulated through the years is not you, never forget that. Even if everything seems hopeless, keep fighting because nothing is more precious than life.
 
wolram

wolram

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 22, 2019
Messages
890
Location
Warwickshire England
#12
I feel a little better today, like I have climbed the first rung of the ladder out of the deep pit,
all due to you guys, I did not attend my meting with my psychiatrist because you guys are better than him, at least you give me some hope.
I still have the urge to kill my self but it is not all encompassing like may be I will or may be I will not .
I hope you guys can keep me on that first rung of the ladder and may be get to the second.

Best wishes to all Wollie.
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
796
Location
Florida
#13
So happy to hear you are feeling better. Sometimes we never think it can be possible.

Keep on posting your thoughts and worries and then the feed back you get should bring you to the next rung of the ladder. Hugs
 
W

wisdomfromwarrior

Active member
Joined
Feb 25, 2019
Messages
28
Location
Paris
#14
I insist I would be all loneliness for 4-5 years and things progressed and evolved so much for me with times, you couldn't believe. stay strong and keep faith at some point things fasten and you will become your strong and your warrior, finding yourself at peace
 
Sammyjames97

Sammyjames97

Active member
Joined
Nov 30, 2018
Messages
28
#15
I know about feeling low because of mind voices, 2 used to bully me and be sinister one of them especially. Over time its got better for me, i wanted to end it several times over the last 19 months but never did. It was shit when I lost my license but I got it back now, you will get yours back eventually if the doctor is happy with your health. Just stay positive and ignore the voices, my voices chatted shit for a long time calling me this and that, most people learn to manage with symptoms of psycosis and get through life well. Take time to rest and mend yourself by doing things you enjoy, i know it's hard when you don't like things the same anymore but my like for video games and tv built back up eventually. If you cant focus because of them i found arguing and being negative about them not best way ahead, try to ignore them or just listen. Looking back almost 2 years its been vile at times but I've come far and you will too !
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
796
Location
Florida
#16
I insist I would be all loneliness for 4-5 years and things progressed and evolved so much for me with times, you couldn't believe. stay strong and keep faith at some point things fasten and you will become your strong and your warrior, finding yourself at peace
ow positive is what you just stated. I am so grateful for you Thanks for keeping up on the post
 
wolram

wolram

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 22, 2019
Messages
890
Location
Warwickshire England
#17
I have missed going in to do my charity work twice, I am going Saturday and just do not know how I will cope, I do not seem to be able to cope with people these days I think large groups of people judge me, that makes me feel very ill. I sweat and shake my voices urge me to kill myself.
What am I to do? I love my work and going to church, will my illness take away what little pleasures I have left.

All the best Wollie.
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
796
Location
Florida
#18
Hi Wollie Never give up and if people are judging you what a mistake they do not even know you-there are still some wonderful people out there maybe one that's in the crowd.

Just let your voices chatter away and ignore them-Social anxiety is awful let alone other mental health disorders.

Go to your job and church push yourself forward not backwards many other pleasant things will come your way I promise Just hold your head up even higher when you feel frighten the blood runs through your body better. Hugs
 
wolram

wolram

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 22, 2019
Messages
890
Location
Warwickshire England
#19
Hi Jules
Thank you for your encouraging reply, The thing is if I get these feelings it is just like hitting a brick wall, my mood drops, my voices become more hostile and my urge to commit suicide
becomes urgent.
It is a great worry for me as I just do not want to feel like that,I have been working as a volunteer for 6 years now and I used to enjoy the job, now I am scared to death of facing customers.

All the best Wollie.
 
megirl

megirl

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 9, 2010
Messages
6,323
Location
NZ
#20
I don't hear voices,
But have bipolar with the depression is hell.
I see suicide in a whole different light now,knowing that yes I had been fortunate in the past with attempts to harm myself. It was this time last I decided that's it I had met a brick wall and knew I can't carry on.
Someone could see what I was going to do and intervened making the decision to put me under the MHA
The horrible tragic thing is that any of us can make this decision not knowing that actually things really can get better. I now am relieved I didn't end it it just hits me that a year on I am doing well and indeed I may not be here from a snap decision
Its worth hanging in there
 
Thread starter Similar threads Forum Replies Date
smilingpixels Hearing Voices Forum 2

Similar threads