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I used to be so happy

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Debaura500

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
197
Location
London
My body's mangled after breast cancer. My brain is fxxked after a drug rape. Mum died in July she had schizophrenia and I had been trying to look after her for years. Struggling to hold it together I want to scream. I'm scared of the dark it's a daily torture there's no relief.
 
bpd2020

bpd2020

Well-known member
Joined
May 25, 2020
Messages
6,942
Location
England
You have been through loosing your mum, having cancer as well as trauma. I think it is understandable to not feel happy. I have BPD too and I understand the emotional pain we have to live with. I really am so sorry things are so painful. Do you have any mental health support?
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
4,454
Location
England
Not many of us are happy anymore. Add covid and the suffering extends to all sorts of people who never knew sadness before, probably.

I am very unhappy and have been through things that i feel have ended my life, i am not who i was. Each day is so hard. I dread every day, but somehow i get through.

I haven't even been through those 3 devastating things you have.

Some people seem have more to deal with than others.

What are you going to do with your experiences? Or are you going to rest and try to find a little happiness somewhere?

I have a cat. I love the seasons. I try to look after what family i have left. I try to make myself happy like these xmas lights, they are amazing.
 
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healthybrain

Active member
Joined
Oct 11, 2020
Messages
40
Location
usa
I wish you can find peace at some point. Meds can help.
 
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Debaura500

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
197
Location
London
Ive had enough. My mentàl health is terrible
 
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Debaura500

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
197
Location
London
I've had enough I can't deal with it all
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
13,533
Location
Nowhere
hang in there Debaura I'm calling for some help ...

:grouphug: 💜
 
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Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
13,533
Location
Nowhere
im not wasting my time Debaura
I've only seen you here a short time
and already I have a sense of you as a person
 
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Debaura500

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
197
Location
London
Who u gonna call ... Ghostbusters
 
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Debaura500

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
197
Location
London
No I have mental health support. I just drink.
 
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Debaura500

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 10, 2020
Messages
197
Location
London
I have a son and cats who keep me sane. I am trying to get over this phobia of the dark, today it doesn't seem as bad. I'm normally a happy person and I got through the first lockdown easily as the anxiety wasn't there. This time anxiety is here and I literally cannot handle all this covid19 it's so abnormal.
 
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