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i think i have replaced my family...

inthemiddle

inthemiddle

Member
Founding Member
Joined
Apr 9, 2008
Messages
15
hi, im begining to think i have a problem.
For years and years i have felt so alone and isolated at home. I am 20 and i still live with my parents. I have never felt a bond between us. My mum has always been emotionally detached and never proud of me and my dad loves me but i just dont feel the same way. i suffered depression and tried to kill myself, feeling like i didnt belong anywhere and so alone.

When i got myself a boyfriend, it was like he was my angel. He cared for me and showed me that i was worth something and i now care about myself because of his unconditional love. His family welcomed me into their lifes and gave me the encouragement and praise and hugs i so desperately needed.

My depression seemed to disapear within a few months of seeing him, i had a lot to thank him for. I have now been with my boyfriend a year and a half. I love his family too. I stay at his house roughly about 5 days a week and it feels so much like home to me..

And that is where i think its becoming unhealthy... Sometimes my boyfriend needs some space and he will say "is it ok if you go home tonight as i have work in the morning" i say ok fine, but deep inside it is like he has stabbed me in the heart. As soon as im off down the road where no one can see, i am uncontrollably in tears! i feel abandoned and alone and the thought of going back to my house scares me. I dont just miss him i miss his family. I never tell him how bad i am when i go though :cry:

i dont know why im writing this, i am just really confused as to why i am getting all of these strong feelings of sadness and being scared and alone when i leave their house. i suppose i have always felt the need to be with people and be comforted. i just dont know.
any comments would be most appreciated ?
 
Last edited:
A

Apotheosis

Guest
Please don't take this the wrong way; & it may be off the mark. - From what I have experienced & have seen in my life; what you describe sounds quite normal.
 
dollylama

dollylama

Active member
Founding Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2008
Messages
43
I was guilty of doing the same thing when I was still a teenager...I ended the relationship after 4 years because I realized that I wasn't into my BF; and that I was only with him because he was my sanctuary.

Believe it or not, your family loves you and they are there for you. When you stay away from them, you indirectly telling them how much they don't mean anything to you and this just makes things worse. Perhaps you should try having more family activities. It might be difficult to commit to at first but it'll help a lot in the long run.
 
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