I miss USA.

frisas45

frisas45

Active member
Joined
Mar 22, 2019
Messages
38
Location
South Korea
#1
My life in America was lonely. The region I lived (cannot tell you exactly which state it is) was devoid of life and people were too busy to hang out with me. Life sucked. But I had opportunities that could lead to good friendships. Plenty of mental help, and good amount of social support.

But here in Korea, there is none. The scenery is nice (beautiful parks, nightlife), but there aren't much good mental health support here. I have to take care of my ill mother and I have panic attacks. And when she shows signs of improvement, I get depressed.

I walk by the river in loneliness and in misery. I had to stay out of her house all the time. I wish I could hang out with nerds who love anime. I want to do like this: (
). These folks depicted on this video went through rough problems, but overcame it and became happy.

I have no such opportunity here in Korea. Everyone is looking for jobs to survive. Then they overwork. No time for hobbies. Heck, it's worse than America. They had to study for hours from childhood to get to that position to survive. Not time for fun, no time for nothing.

And there are circumstances that I cannot enjoy anime. In order for my mother to heal, I have to stop watching anime for religious purposes. Having exposed to fundamentalist Christianity doesn't help things. I tried every they tell me to do, and nothing worked.

I tried to enjoy this life, but it's not enjoyable.
 
ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
233
Location
California, USA
#2
Hi frisas45!

I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling and that life has been very tough for you. If you don't mind me asking, why did you move to South Korea? I'm really into KPOP and from that I know that there is a lot of pressure on society on being attractive and being perfect that life loses it's spark. KPOP is probably just a teeny weeny bit of what you're experiencing. I do hope that you're able to find support and to do the things you like. I don't particularly believe in a certain religion, but I've always believed in doing what's good for your soul.

I'm originally from Pennsylvania and I'm currently living in California. I can relate to you that my home town had more opportunities for me and everyone and everything was much easier to access. I am truly hoping that you find that small group of individual that can make life more fun for you. While my words may not help you much, I'm always here if you want to talk, and so is the forum too! We're all here for one another.

PS. (I like anime too!)
 
frisas45

frisas45

Active member
Joined
Mar 22, 2019
Messages
38
Location
South Korea
#3
Hi frisas45!

I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling and that life has been very tough for you. If you don't mind me asking, why did you move to South Korea? I'm really into KPOP and from that I know that there is a lot of pressure on society on being attractive and being perfect that life loses it's spark. KPOP is probably just a teeny weeny bit of what you're experiencing. I do hope that you're able to find support and to do the things you like. I don't particularly believe in a certain religion, but I've always believed in doing what's good for your soul.

I'm originally from Pennsylvania and I'm currently living in California. I can relate to you that my home town had more opportunities for me and everyone and everything was much easier to access. I am truly hoping that you find that small group of individual that can make life more fun for you. While my words may not help you much, I'm always here if you want to talk, and so is the forum too! We're all here for one another.

PS. (I like anime too!)
I moved to South Korea due to my parents being fed up of living the American life. We were immigrants from another country and they could not speak the language. I could've let them go, and found myself a job. However, as a mentally challenged man, I can't take the pressure of making ends meet in US. Expenses are high, and the pay is low. That is why I came to South Korea. Basically... to mooch off. To survive.
 
ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
233
Location
California, USA
#4
Hi frisas45!

It surely doesn't sound like you're mooching off. Life is tough, we all need to lean on each other for support and I believe that you're trying your best. Would you like to talk about your mental struggles? I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
 
frisas45

frisas45

Active member
Joined
Mar 22, 2019
Messages
38
Location
South Korea
#5
Hi frisas45!

It surely doesn't sound like you're mooching off. Life is tough, we all need to lean on each other for support and I believe that you're trying your best. Would you like to talk about your mental struggles? I have Generalized Anxiety Disorder.
I am a mentally challenged man (suffering from bipolar disorder and paranoid schizophrenia) raising a mentally challenged mother who is suffering from delusions. She gets angry if I try to force her to take pills and do what's best for her. She never listens to me, and does whatever she wants. Like, I don't want to force her, but she does many destructive behaviors that I cannot utter here.

The doctor isn't being helpful, unless if she does what he asks for her to do. She can't. Otherwise, we have to go to a general hospital. I have no money for that. And I have a liver problem, and he can't give me any pills that reduce anxiety.

I can only worry about myself, but I am scared that I might lose a place to live if she dies like this. In South Korea, it's hard to get a job. Even foreigners like me.

I am terrified, and it's been three agonizing months of suffering. Her constantly yelling and screaming. I can't stand this anymore.
 

Similar threads