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I hate you depression - joined the gym to try and slowly get out of the hole

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Livebythesea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
61
Location
East Coast
When I am not depressed I actually enjoy going to the gym, several days a week...but I stopped going over a year ago - that is how long this damn depression has lasted this time...amazing that exercise is one of the first things to go. With my brother's gentle words - month after month - telling me 'you will get out of this' 'the depression wants you to stay in bed' 'the anxiety wants you to think your problems will never change' well today after 15 long months I'm tired of the pain of laying in bed, tired of my problems, tired of feeling like nothing will change, tired of the excuses. I am here at the gym - it's expensive, but at least it's for physical and mental health reasons. I may not feel better when I leave, but I know I won't feel worse.

Hugs to you all in this painful fight we experience every hour of every day.
 
wollie

wollie

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2019
Messages
535
Location
warwick
Hi.
I think you are brave getting out and doing some thying for yourself, they say exersize is good for us.:D
 
A

AL123

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
55
Location
England
Hey Livebythesea. First of all well done to yourself for taking the decision of going back to the gym. How do you feel after going? Should be proud of yourself for making such a positive decision :)
 
J

juneau46

Member
Joined
Dec 2, 2019
Messages
5
Location
Iowa
Very admirable that you not only got out of bed (a battle within itself) but you went above and beyond to go to the gym. I stopped going to the gym a year ago as well coincidentally and need to start going again. Kudos to you!
 
L

Livebythesea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
61
Location
East Coast
Hey Livebythesea. First of all well done to yourself for taking the decision of going back to the gym. How do you feel after going? Should be proud of yourself for making such a positive decision :)
Thank you so very much. My body was hurting a lot from doing nothing, so I feel a bit limber now - thank you so much for asking.
 
L

Livebythesea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
61
Location
East Coast
Very admirable that you not only got out of bed (a battle within itself) but you went above and beyond to go to the gym. I stopped going to the gym a year ago as well coincidentally and need to start going again. Kudos to you!
Thank you for understanding that it's a battle in itself just to get out of bed. It helps so much to know others understand. I hope you make it there sometime soon. It was nice to be there. Forgot my problems for a bit.
 
Mintymint

Mintymint

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 26, 2019
Messages
385
Location
UK
Well done for trying! Exercise does everyone good. Most mornings I go running. Keep your gym activity going. It will make a big difference even in a short time. :)
 
L

Livebythesea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
61
Location
East Coast
Well done for trying! Exercise does everyone good. Most mornings I go running. Keep your gym activity going. It will make a big difference even in a short time. :)
You're so lucky you are well enough and have the energy to go running most mornings. Going to the gym gives me a glimpse of my old life and routine. I hope I make it there tomorrow. Thank you
 
Mintymint

Mintymint

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 26, 2019
Messages
385
Location
UK
You're so lucky you are well enough and have the energy to go running most mornings. Going to the gym gives me a glimpse of my old life and routine. I hope I make it there tomorrow. Thank you
I'm not lucky to be well enough. I'm self-employed, therefore the onus was on me to work to pay the utility and food bills after my husband died suddenly, and I have 4 children, all vulnerable teenagers who depended on me and me alone. It was just as tough for them.

I've been a painter and decorator for years, but I was damned to let depression make me useless and stop work. The government doesn't give benefit handouts to the likes of us, therefore I had to make the effort and try running to reduce my depression.

At the beginning it was very, very difficult. I hate muscle cramps in my legs just as much as I hated the rain which poured down most mornings I started this morning exercise. The first week was very trying and my leg muscles ached like a *****. But I began feeling better. Not lucky. Just better for making the effort.

I'm glad you've taken out a gym membership. It will most deffs give you a glimpse of your old life and routine, but you've got to hang in there, okay? While at gym, you take things easy to begin with. Develop strength by regular exercise and your strength will increase like mine did. Before starting gym, have a light breakfast. I have a bowl of porridge oats for the energy giving carbs.

Tomorrow I'll be thinking of you. Do tell us how you got on. :)
 
L

Livebythesea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
61
Location
East Coast
I'm not lucky to be well enough. I'm self-employed, therefore the onus was on me to work to pay the utility and food bills after my husband died suddenly, and I have 4 children, all vulnerable teenagers who depended on me and me alone. It was just as tough for them.

I've been a painter and decorator for years, but I was damned to let depression make me useless and stop work. The government doesn't give benefit handouts to the likes of us, therefore I had to make the effort and try running to reduce my depression.

At the beginning it was very, very difficult. I hate muscle cramps in my legs just as much as I hated the rain which poured down most mornings I started this morning exercise. The first week was very trying and my leg muscles ached like a *****. But I began feeling better. Not lucky. Just better for making the effort.

I'm glad you've taken out a gym membership. It will most deffs give you a glimpse of your old life and routine, but you've got to hang in there, okay? While at gym, you take things easy to begin with. Develop strength by regular exercise and your strength will increase like mine did. Before starting gym, have a light breakfast. I have a bowl of porridge oats for the energy giving carbs.

Tomorrow I'll be thinking of you. Do tell us how you got on. :)
Thanks very much for the above. I am very sorry for your loss. I have a son who is not a teenager yet so I cannot imagine all that you go through to provide for four children. My marriage and career have suffered so much due to my illness. So unfair what we have to go through and others do not.

I plan to go to the gym tomorrow after the bus picks up my child for school. I will be fighting to go back to bed, but maybe I'll win the fight against the depression demon tomorrow as I did today. Maybe one day I'll even be well enough to work again, as the financial issues that come along with this illness are depressing on their own!

Wishing you a good day.
 
Mintymint

Mintymint

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 26, 2019
Messages
385
Location
UK
Thanks very much for the above. I am very sorry for your loss. I have a son who is not a teenager yet so I cannot imagine all that you go through to provide for four children. My marriage and career have suffered so much due to my illness. So unfair what we have to go through and others do not.

I plan to go to the gym tomorrow after the bus picks up my child for school. I will be fighting to go back to bed, but maybe I'll win the fight against the depression demon tomorrow as I did today. Maybe one day I'll even be well enough to work again, as the financial issues that come along with this illness are depressing on their own!

Wishing you a good day.
I'm not religious but will pray for you in my own way.

My marriage also suffered when he was alive. It was a struggle then, but somehow I had to muddle through because my kids are everything to me.

For you like for me, it's one day at a time. I believe in you with the same fierceness I have for myself. Depression is a beast, but it can be tamed. Also, being part of this wonderful community helps us enormously, and I thank you too. :)
 
L

Livebythesea

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 29, 2019
Messages
61
Location
East Coast
Hey. How are things with yourself today?
I am at the gym again now, on the step machine...I am feeling sore but pleased with myself that I have had the strength to bear the urge to stay in bed three days in a row. Only you kind folks on here could understand how hard it is. Thank you so very much for checking in. Wishing you a very good day.
 
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