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I finally did it

I

IHprincess

New member
Joined
Jan 21, 2020
Messages
2
Location
USA
After 2 years, the night before we are supposed to move in together, I finally sabotaged our relationship.

I think I hurt him enough that we may not come back from this. I hate BPD. I hate that I'm like this.
 
D

Dororih

Active member
Joined
Feb 3, 2020
Messages
36
Location
Singapore
Recently I did something that crossed the line with my bf as well (we would have dated 2 years as of Mar this year).

But after that I finally took BPD seriously, started going for therapy and reading a lot etc. After breaking up with me for 3 weeks, my bf decided to give me a chance (although he can't say for sure we will work, because he wants me to work my BPD and he needs to get better from his anxiety/depression).

Have you gone for therapy and intensely dealt with your BPD?
 
W

wraziel

New member
Joined
Feb 12, 2020
Messages
3
Location
Asia
I'm man. I suspect I've BPD cause I have a tendency to sabotage sentimental relationships in the beginning, even she focuses in me. Maybe I can't support the emotional dependence or I don't wanna go by the way of hypersexuality.
 
M

Mal84

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 15, 2020
Messages
564
Location
Hovering in the Atlantic
After 2 years, the night before we are supposed to move in together, I finally sabotaged our relationship.

I think I hurt him enough that we may not come back from this. I hate BPD. I hate that I'm like this.
Hi and welcome.

I hope it isn’t as bad as you thinking
 
A

AppletreeConfusion

Member
Joined
Jan 16, 2020
Messages
19
Location
UK
He might just meet someone else later on, and you probably isolate yourself also.
 
I

IHprincess

New member
Joined
Jan 21, 2020
Messages
2
Location
USA
Recently I did something that crossed the line with my bf as well (we would have dated 2 years as of Mar this year).

But after that I finally took BPD seriously, started going for therapy and reading a lot etc. After breaking up with me for 3 weeks, my bf decided to give me a chance (although he can't say for sure we will work, because he wants me to work my BPD and he needs to get better from his anxiety/depression).

Have you gone for therapy and intensely dealt with your BPD?
I've been in therapy before, but never anyone who really focused on my BPD (they tended to target my anxiety and depression). I've been holding off starting with a new therapist til I move because I am moving several hundred miles away.

We talked, he admitted he reacted poorly as well. We are postponing the move for a few weeks/a month or so but he acknowledges he knows my current living situation adds to the BPD and he 100% wants to spend the rest of his life with me.

Also, he is doing more in depth research on BPD, trying to understand the things I do sometimes and also figuring out if there are additional steps he can take to help me.

We are also searching for a kink friendly therapist with experience in treating BPD so when I move, I can start therapy ASAP. We are in a power exchange type relationship, which tbh helps me a ton (but we also both know that he can not fix everything nor should he have to try) - so it's important we find someone I can be honest with about it since it is a huge part of my life


Hi and welcome.

I hope it isn’t as bad as you thinking
Thank you - it was bad, but we worked it out
 
D

Dororih

Active member
Joined
Feb 3, 2020
Messages
36
Location
Singapore
I've been in therapy before, but never anyone who really focused on my BPD (they tended to target my anxiety and depression). I've been holding off starting with a new therapist til I move because I am moving several hundred miles away.

We talked, he admitted he reacted poorly as well. We are postponing the move for a few weeks/a month or so but he acknowledges he knows my current living situation adds to the BPD and he 100% wants to spend the rest of his life with me.

Also, he is doing more in depth research on BPD, trying to understand the things I do sometimes and also figuring out if there are additional steps he can take to help me.

We are also searching for a kink friendly therapist with experience in treating BPD so when I move, I can start therapy ASAP. We are in a power exchange type relationship, which tbh helps me a ton (but we also both know that he can not fix everything nor should he have to try) - so it's important we find someone I can be honest with about it since it is a huge part of my life
Sounds great that he has admitted that he reacted poorly, and is willing to research on BPD and give you a chance without too much flak. It'll be tough but I hope you really cherish this opportunity since your bf is being so openly accepting of your BDP and even willing to read up on it. All the best!
 
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