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I feel so guilty

5

5wimmer

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 15, 2016
Messages
72
I am suffering anxiety just had to retire early as a result.

In a shop I go to, an assistant of about 35 has started wearing a skirt I love, although I am male, and would like to buy for a friend. I asked her where it came from and she told me, but she got it a couple of years ago. This was about 2 weeks ago I asked.

I apologised as I thought I'd overstepped the mark, but she assured me I hadn't.

Today, I asked her if inside the item, there was an ID or code number and she told her boss she felt uncomfortable. I obviously meant it innocently.

I assured the manager I meant no harm and was just enquiring about a skirt. The manager has known me a long time and said she knows this and that the waitress has recently been getting unwanted attention from younger men, which is why she has kept her behind the desks recently.

The manager has, in me just phoning, said that she has chatted with the waitess and no harm is done and she fully understands.

I feel so guilty and ashamed.
 
S

Sarah63689

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 15, 2019
Messages
84
Location
UK
It doesn't sound like you've done anything wrong, she was was probably feeling more sensitive after getting some unwanted attention from other people. You did the right thing in speaking to the manager and explaining that you meant no harm, which she understands as does the assistant. So no need to feel guilty. I understand why it would have upset you but it's over now and you've put things right by apologising.
 
5

5wimmer

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 15, 2016
Messages
72
What if the unwanted attention was from me? Or am I over-thinking?
 
5

5wimmer

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 15, 2016
Messages
72
I am still beating myself up about this and feel guilty.
 
H

Helena1

Well-known member
Forum Safety Team
Joined
Oct 11, 2014
Messages
10,051
Location
UK
Don't feel guilty as you meant no harm, just learn from it and don't ask about the ID code in future.
 
5

5wimmer

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 15, 2016
Messages
72
I feel a bit better, but still guilty.
 
P

PsychoPrince

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 22, 2019
Messages
128
Location
Indy
Hey man, you're good! Just a misunderstanding, happens to us all. No need to beat yourself up.
 
5

5wimmer

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 15, 2016
Messages
72
Is it just a misunderstanding?
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
1,586
Location
Florida
5wimmer you should have just asked her if she would sell the skirt to you. I have seen things that I fell in love with and I always see if they are willing to sell it. They know where they purchased so it helps. No fears and no worries love and hugs Jules
 
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