• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

I feel so guilty because of how apathetic/empty I am.

T

Tealseal

Member
Joined
Aug 18, 2020
Messages
6
Location
Mansfield
I don't feel emotions like most people, I'm apathetic and I don't find anything interesting. I'm nowhere near as depressed as I used to be, a few years ago I was extremely unhygienic, very unmotivated and I couldn't function. Now, I'm a lot better. However, this emptiness is persistent. I feel guilty that I'm this way because other people around me show interest in things whereas I'm left feeling indifferent.

I am just so hollow, I tense up around people and just feel so disconnected. Sometimes I want the ground to swallow me up, I want to be social but at the same time being around people makes me feel suffocated and anxious. I don't look forward to anything and don't enjoy anything. I don't feel human. I can cope, I have some motivation, I'm not feeling very low, I'm just completely empty.

My friend suggested going somewhere Friday-monday one weekend in July and he was really up for it. I made a post recently about how he might be depressed as his house is very untidy, tiredness, lack of motivation etc. Yet, this was something he was looking forward to. He was coming up with places where we could go and he obviously asked for my opinion and I didn't have one. However, I can't look forward to anything and going somewhere for a few nights would be too much for me when I'm not used to doing much. I feel guilty that he wanted to do something and I'm not interested in anything. I can enjoy someone's company and want to spend time with them but what I do with someone makes no difference to me. It would be unfair of me to let him spend money, time, booking 2 days off work etc for me to be so uninterested. I feel so guilty that this is how I am because he doesn't have anyone else to do these things with. I feel like I've let him down.

I don't like being this way. It's nothing to do with how it affects me because I can deal with being this way as I'm used to it. But, it's how it affects others.
 
B

BeanThere

Member
Joined
Jun 14, 2021
Messages
14
Location
Uk
Make it one day? Getting used to being with other for periods can be hard (or impossible), but worth a try. You're better than you were...maybe could improve a bit more.

I can cope with people for a few hours at a time, then it gets intolerable, that's enough for me.

I'd suggest not writing it off, unless you really feel that being an island is for you, which your words suggest not.

Might help?
 
E

EclipticNight

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2020
Messages
533
Location
Orleans vermont.
I can relate to the feeling. Because of my background violence does not elicit emotion from me. I can litterally see someone torn to pieces and never stop eating my dinner. I feel just as guilty because I do care in almost every other way, it's just violence does nothing. People act appalled and sick and I fake it but no matter how horrible it is I just dont care.

The best thing I can do is understand what I should feel and act on that. I follow the social and moral norm since I'm damaged in this area, I'm not saying you are by the way. I'm going to give you the same advice my school best friend gave me back in high school. Indecision is the wrong decision. So how do you pick when you dont really care? Chance. Ask for some options, load a random number generator, make a guideline rule for the amount of choices and let fate pick for you. That way you chose for your friend without having to muster up the will to consider it. Works for me every time.
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
L Feel like it’s my own fault Depression Forum 4
M Feel So Awful Depression Forum 6
sagetea 123 I feel like I am going around in circles... Depression Forum 6
K Just feel like I need to share what’s in my head right now Depression Forum 7
R i feel like a degenerate Depression Forum 3
T Do you feel the modern world discourages novelty Depression Forum 8
L I Feel Like Lashing Out... Depression Forum 10
sirhamsy Today i feel so empty Depression Forum 2
Sendmetothevoid13 Do you ever feel like you're existing and not living? Depression Forum 37
K I feel very lost in general Depression Forum 11
ILikePancakes I Feel Like I shouldn't Get Help Depression Forum 3
B Feel like ending it Depression Forum 12
Amelia2020 Feel depressed about how distant and cold my family is Depression Forum 6
I Feel very depressed Depression Forum 21
P Feel so unloved Depression Forum 6
doexdeer Do you ever feel like Depression Forum 7
K How does it feel to say it out loud for the first time? Depression Forum 20
P I feel so useless and depressed because I can't drive Depression Forum 2
K Feel like i'm slowly giving up Depression Forum 3
ILikePancakes I Feel Sad Depression Forum 2
Sxzopen I feel lonely and I want to disappear Depression Forum 7
C When you just feel overwhelmed by it all Depression Forum 14
S To the people on here who make me feel pathetic. Depression Forum 48
J Theres so much and I feel alone Depression Forum 8
ILikePancakes I feel so sad :( Depression Forum 3
G Does Anyone Else Feel Like This.. Depression Forum 9
A I want to be alone, just do not want to feel lonely. Depression Forum 5
N Just want to feel something Depression Forum 6
7 I feel like nothing is worth living anymore Depression Forum 14
L I feel like wanting anyone to love me would be such a burden to them Depression Forum 5
Signofthetimes Do you feel sorry for things constantly? Depression Forum 17
P I Feel Like I Don't Have Almost None Happiness Hormones Left In Me Depression Forum 12
F Anybody else just feel like they're existing? Depression Forum 12
L I feel completely lost and panicking! Depression Forum 2
B I feel like I would be better off dead Depression Forum 11
Fairy Lucretia i feel a bit left out x Depression Forum 16
L does anyone feel they are going through the day like floating soul? Depression Forum 31
S Everyone makes me feel worthless, especially mom. Maybe I am. Depression Forum 12
Fairy Lucretia i don't feel well Depression Forum 9
S I Feel Like A Ghost Depression Forum 8
O I cant feel anything and i cant tell anyone. Depression Forum 47
L How would you feel or react to this...? Depression Forum 3
H A feel like im lossing my life away. Depression Forum 6
Hardknocks88 feel like doing nothing. Depression Forum 5
S No one has ever loved me in a way that made me feel loved Depression Forum 10
S I think I am rotting inside. I am contemplating calling my psychiatrist, but feel like it's pointless Depression Forum 4
Blooming I feel rather depressed today. Depression Forum 5
K I feel like I'm lost in life Depression Forum 12
L I feel like im stuck Depression Forum 12
CenotaphGirl I want to have a baby..to the point I feel broken Depression Forum 15

Similar threads

Top