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I feel lost. Lost my job have no money and now my partner hates me

A

Amanda26

New member
Joined
Jan 9, 2014
Messages
3
I need help, need someone to talk too, I feel like I've given up on everything . I have been this way since I left an abusive relationship 5 years ago. I had a child with him. I met my current partner 3 years ago and it was all lovely until my depression kicked in again and he's changed. He hates how I bring my daughter up always saying I'm too soft and she's growing up to be a vindictive spoilt cheeky girl (she's 5 and a half) I worked full time and he questioned what I spent my money on when I asked him for a loan, he's lovely when he's not stressed but when I do something he doesn't like he turns nasty, saying I will end up sad and lonely and sometimes saying he wants to smash my face up. The reason I'm on here is because iv lost my job I have no money, even though I have my partner I am scared to ask for money he has offered to pay for things but I am scared he will treat me like a worthless piece of crap, I don't know what to do and I can't even explain my situation properly on here I just feel like giving up. I feel so guilty on my little girl because now I can't even provide for her. I used to have so much confidence now I'm just a shy, sad individual. It's hit me hard losing my job but it's making it even harder by my partner saying I should treat him better or he'll leave, I would understand if I was doing something wrong but I don't even know how he would think this I don't know where I'm going wrong and don't know where to turn. Please help
 
Reach

Reach

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 1, 2014
Messages
1,295
Sorry you are going through such a difficult time. It sounds like you've been through alot for a number of years actually and i bet you feel at rock bottom. I know it is none of my business by any man who says even once, no matter why, that he'd like to smash my face in, is someone that has to go. There is no way i would put myself at risk never mind my child. It doesn't sound like he loves and adores you child as he should either. Is it possible you've swapped one abusive relationship for another.
 
N

Nicola398

Former member
Hello Amanda
I agree with Reach no man should be allowed to threaten violence.
It is very hard to lose your job and be struggling with depression and I understand why being dependent financially on your partner is a problem.If you are keen to keep the relationship alive perhaps asking your partner to talk through some issues may be helpful.It sounds like you are surprised by him saying you should treat him better or he will leave and you deserve more feedback on what are the ways he feels you are not treating him well. you might like to say to him that the way he is treating you is making you feel he is going to turn round and treat you like you are worthless.maybe that way things will be out in the open and you can work things out.Maybe ask for a certain amount of spending money for yourself each week to lessen you fears about money?I know you say you have lost confidence and losing your job is i know a big blow but after licking your wounds and a short rest the best way to get your confidence back up there is to start looking for another job to apply for.After all if you held the last job for a while it is only a matter of time before you are back in work.If you can be positive and make the decision to work with the current situation instead of fight and regret things then there is more chance of a good outcome.
I wish you well.
NicolaX
 
A

Amanda26

New member
Joined
Jan 9, 2014
Messages
3
That's what I'm scared of, even though my last relationship was physical abuse, I'm finding it hard because he is so nice at times and maybe it's just the way I am maybe trying to knock some sense into me? I drove to a spot where a school friend had killed themselves and I hate to say it but I had some thoughts of suicide I don't know what to do and them more I'm writing this the more it's upsetting me, I am scared at what I'll be like if I tell him I'm not happy, he doesn't seem to get that I am hurt and upset inside he just tells me I have nothing to be upset over, I can't cope anymore, and I know he will emotionally break me if I say I'm not happy x
 
Reach

Reach

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 1, 2014
Messages
1,295
Do you want to leave him?

I suppose being depressed means you are not fit to make any decisions right now. Have you been to your GP?
 
A

Amanda26

New member
Joined
Jan 9, 2014
Messages
3
I don't know what I want reach. I do love him and it isn't like this all the time, I feel like I can't talk to him about how I feel though I went to GP a while back and they put me on 40mg of citalopram I feel like these have helped with anxiety but I still feel empty and unhappy x
 

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