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I don't want to get out of bed. :(

Garry_Kerr

Garry_Kerr

Member
Joined
Apr 11, 2015
Messages
13
Hello.
I am new to this forum so be easy on me if I post in the wrong section or do not make much sense etc. :)

I have recently made a big change in my life, moving away from a life of partying, drink and drugs with 'friends' all around all the time to staying back with the parents in a town where I have no friends.
I have my parents and my Brother and his Wife and my brand new baby Cousin!

So I am not alone, but I feel it is very hard to "get up and go" in the mornings. Since I do not have a job I feel it is very hard to want to get out of my bed in the mornings and get a routine.

Is anyone else in this situation of not wanting to get out of bed or finding it hard to get a routine? Any thoughts on this matter would be great.
 
R

Rob27

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Joined
Apr 8, 2015
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68
Location
Derby
Hi Garry_Kerr

I'm Rob, Welcome to the forum I'm new to everyone's lovely her :). In august I lost my job due to my illness and found it hard to get in to a routine and I still do but I set my self task for the day, nothing big incase I'm having a bad day but most days it will be get up somewhere between 8 and 9 have breakfast, take the dog for a walk, clean for a bit and then watch film and play the xbox. Its not a lot and there's still a lot of free time but I'm starting to add more stuff to fill up the day, I'm looking into training courses so I can be in a better position when I go back to work.

I started off small because I wouldn't achieve what I wanted to and I'm adding things slowly so its not so hard.

I understand struggling to get out of bed but you have to find a reason to and then build on it. I hope that helps a bit and I would be will to bet everyone here has had or still haves that problem.
 
Unique1

Unique1

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Jan 27, 2015
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Hiya

I had to give up my job due to MI too, after working many years.
For months I couldn't move, didn't want to. It was a slow process for me. It's hard. Rob27 is right its a case of doing things a little at a time.
Having some structure is very helpful.
I tend to work in the basis that I do something on one day and nothing the next, as I get really tired too. I don't beat myself up about the day I just chill around and watch movies at home.
I tended to get out of bed a little more initially if I had something planned, possibly something I wanted to do, something small, like a coffee at Costa in a seat were I could do some people watching or use wifi. Just half an hour or an hour it just got me up dressed and out. I don't do it all the time some days I still can't face people and the world :) start small, even planning a bubble bath and sticking to the plan wherever poss.
It's not easy, this forum is good as you will get tips just by reading threads.
I've got a long way to go, it can be done, it's about having a little structure and not being hard on yourself.
Wishing you well. Hope you enjoy the forum!
 
catkin

catkin

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in a bit of a ravel
I find it hard to get out of bed too, and hard to stay out of it. I too try to do the one day of facing the world, and the next allowing self to rest, recover, hide. Having little jobs that need doing on a list that aren't daunting help me to feel there's a point to getting up.
If I'm hiding for too many days I tell myself I HAVE to stay in bed, perversely I then tend to get up ....x
 
Unique1

Unique1

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I find it hard to get out of bed too, and hard to stay out of it. I too try to do the one day of facing the world, and the next allowing self to rest, recover, hide. Having little jobs that need doing on a list that aren't daunting help me to feel there's a point to getting up.
If I'm hiding for too many days I tell myself I HAVE to stay in bed, perversely I then tend to get up ....x
Yes catkin it's funny we all have our own ways of coping. I find it a little better now I don't beat myself up about it, I think when I did it kept me there, now I'm not doing that I tend to do a bit more :)
 
Garry_Kerr

Garry_Kerr

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Joined
Apr 11, 2015
Messages
13
Thanks very much to all of you for sharing your thoughts on my issue at hand. :clap:

I do write a list of easy manageable (not too intense) things to do for the next day which does add structure to my life and makes me feel like I am achieving something each time I tick something off my list.

I am on day 2 of getting up at a reasonable time now (10 am) and I am realising that I actually feel much better when I get up when my alarm(s) go off rather than lying there thinking " what is the point" or being scared to get up in case I have nothing to fill my day with.

I will keep writing in this Thread every day or so to update how I get on with my "getting up at 10am" thing to see how it pans out. :)

Cheers ma dears!
Garry
 
katya

katya

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Dec 4, 2013
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That sounds like a really positive step; I'm glad you're able to get up when your alarm goes off, too. You might want to start doing a lovely morning routine that'll make yo want to get out of bed more? Maybe a lovely breakfast? Smoked salmon and cream cheese bagel with fresh orange juice?

;)

My ex bought me one of these for my birthday once; they're really good alarm clocks that simulate the rising of the sun alongside your alarm so you can have a more "natural" waking up. Expensive, but worth it if you're struggling in the mornings - they really work!
 
Garry_Kerr

Garry_Kerr

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Joined
Apr 11, 2015
Messages
13
jruth: Yeah I used to have a good routine a few years back of getting up at 9am and going out an intense cycle. I would go out no matter what the weather was like, snow, blizzards, rain, nothing would stop me. I just drilled it inot my head that I HAD TO get up as soon as my alarm went off at 9am and jump straight on that bike and cycle very hard so that I was definitely releasing those lovely natural endorphins. It was very hard at first and it was always hard, but after I was used to getting up and straight on to my bike like a robot or army cadet it got easier so I pushed myself to get round my cycle route faster and faster.

So I think I might try and get back into that cycle of cycling. :) See what I did there? :p

On the topic of alarm clocks I actually have a special alarm clock. This one is pretty much the exact opposite of your one though. :D
Check out this bad boy! If ANYONE here is finding it hard to hear their alarm clock in the mornings then get yourself one of these.
Warning though. It can be set to go off VERY VERY VERY loud! It can go as loud as 113dB!

Cheers guys!
Garry
 
Anime-Alchemy

Anime-Alchemy

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Oct 21, 2013
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On a comet
I would sometimes not get out of bed until about 10am. But now as a part of my recovery I want to and am getting out of bed earlier (overall this is the theme). Yesterday i got out of bed and then eventually went back to sleep (but that was due to over things). Anyways getting into a routine can be difficult at first but we all eventually get used to it and it becomes easier.
 
Unique1

Unique1

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Jan 27, 2015
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UK
Hi Garry.

Yes battling with similar myself. Getting some structure is really difficult for me right now.

Omg that alarm !! No way could I have that waking me up it would scare the crap outa me lol...

Wish you well :)
 
Garry_Kerr

Garry_Kerr

Member
Joined
Apr 11, 2015
Messages
13
Haha, yeah that alarm is dangerous! :)

I am sorry to hear that you are finding it so hard to get structure in your life and finding it hard to get out of bed.

Since posting this thread I have only had 1 day where I didn't really want to get out of bed. I am amazed at how I am doing. I know I have a hell of a long way to go before I am ready to find myself a full time career that will support me, but in the space of a week or so I have gone from feeling that I am stuck in a negative cycle for the rest of my life to actually being able to get out of bed at a reasonable time and face the world.

Someone else mentioned not to be too hard on ones self and to take small steps. This is perfect advice I think.
If you are too hard on yourself for not achieving things throughout the day then you will get no where. You can start being more hard on yourself when you have a solid day to day routine. :)

Feel free to share your feeling in this thread. I would like to help in any way I can.
I found that just writing this thread has helped me sort out my head a bit.

It's amazing what writing can do. It makes you think about what you are thinking if you get my drift. :)

Garry :LOL::LOL::peace::LOL::hug1:
 
J

Joey56

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Joined
Apr 22, 2015
Messages
12
Location
New Hampshire
Hi Garry,

I'm also new here. I know how you feel. What I do to try and get my mind in a good place is, walk in the forest for hours and look at all the wonderful things around you. (I hate to admit, this is not working lately for me. I'll start a thread on it.) But this has worked for me for the past 15 years. If you have forests or mountains near you, try it.

I wish you all the best,
Joey :peace:
 
U

urbangibbon

Guest
Hello.
I am new to this forum so be easy on me if I post in the wrong section or do not make much sense etc. :)

I have recently made a big change in my life, moving away from a life of partying, drink and drugs with 'friends' all around all the time to staying back with the parents in a town where I have no friends.
I have my parents and my Brother and his Wife and my brand new baby Cousin!

So I am not alone, but I feel it is very hard to "get up and go" in the mornings. Since I do not have a job I feel it is very hard to want to get out of my bed in the mornings and get a routine.

Is anyone else in this situation of not wanting to get out of bed or finding it hard to get a routine? Any thoughts on this matter would be great.
I had a similar experience in my twenties. I had a very close circle of friends and we were all into each other and on the "same wavelength". Then somebody slept with somebody else (when they shouldn't have!) and it destroyed the whole "togetherness" of the group. We used to have a great time. It ended and I fell into social isolation. I felt lost. What I did is to travel for a bit. I tramped around Europe. It was my way of finding my bearings again. That is all you can do, I think. Put it down to experience. Don't brood on it. And just move on with something else. Well, this is what I did.

To be honest - and speaking personally - I reached the stage where I could not live in the parental home. It was too restrictive psychologically. I left in my late teens/early twenties.
 
In the Clouds

In the Clouds

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Apr 22, 2015
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1,892
Location
England
Hi Garry :)
I would try and plan something I would really look forward to. 'I have to get through today to do ____ tomorrow.' and that really motivated me to get up and face the day. :)
I also found having a responsibility to do that only I could do got me out of bed as it made me feel important. Like the house being empty and so I had to walk the dog as it would be very unfair for me to stay in bed then.
Do whatever you can to give yourself a sense of worth. :)
 
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