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I don't want to be here..

Mummyoftwo

Mummyoftwo

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Dec 6, 2020
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28
Location
Blackburn
I don't want to be here anymore...today has been one of the worse to me I've just started crying and feel so used...I have two kids but most days I feel they would be better off without me I'm even self-harming to get a feeling of anything and not just this empty numbness..
 
Mummyoftwo

Mummyoftwo

Active member
Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
28
Location
Blackburn
Hello my luv,
What do you mean by used? Xxx
A few nights ago slept with someone who has been there for me we were in a relationship but things went a bit down hill but we're on good terms he's the father to my young son but today I've messaged just asking how work was and he hasn't answered back he's been online but didn't bother....I feel like that with a lot of people...cause of the last relationship I'll stuggle with anyone else but with him I thought yeah it's alright I know it probably does make sense sorry
 
G

Gem

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Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
43
Location
Liverpool
It makes alot of sense, you get two types of men in your life. The fast txter, and the slow. The fast one, he will be there for you, he wont make you laugh or turn you on but he will be with you until the end, OR the slow txter, this type will keep your heart beating as fast as it can, be the best in bed, and make you laugh all night long, BUT HE WILL CHEAT ON YOU, TXT YOUR MATES, LEAVE YOU TO ONE SIDE UNTILL HE NEEDS YOU, AND MAKE HIS SON SEE HIS MUM UNHAPPY ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Your choice sweetheart xxxx
 
Mummyoftwo

Mummyoftwo

Active member
Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
28
Location
Blackburn
It makes alot of sense, you get two types of men in your life. The fast txter, and the slow. The fast one, he will be there for you, he wont make you laugh or turn you on but he will be with you until the end, OR the slow txter, this type will keep your heart beating as fast as it can, be the best in bed, and make you laugh all night long, BUT HE WILL CHEAT ON YOU, TXT YOUR MATES, LEAVE YOU TO ONE SIDE UNTILL HE NEEDS YOU, AND MAKE HIS SON SEE HIS MUM UNHAPPY ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Your choice sweetheart xxxx
We're not together it was just one night we both needed it but now just not answering a text trying to sort things out for him to have he's son is just piss me off a bit...he even said as long as it won't mess with my head he would come over and I honestly know it's not messing with my head just feels like a slap in the face if you get me then with me having a panic attack over the attic door being open after a strong wind today hasn't helped...I honestly feel like what's the point
 
G

Gem

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Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
43
Location
Liverpool
Its definitely messed with your head, its not a big deal. All us girls do it. Do you still love him then?? Be honest xx
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
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Nov 10, 2019
Messages
5,314
Location
England
Please don't hurt yourself physically, you need comfort not harm. It isn't easy to cope with life, it's very difficult.
 
G

Gem

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Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
43
Location
Liverpool
Ow im ok Today, i just wanted to reach out to those who arnt. Xx
 
Tawny

Tawny

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England
I agree you shouldn't have sex with this man. You were used. I don't know any woman who can have casual sex. We are made differently to men like that.
 
Mummyoftwo

Mummyoftwo

Active member
Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
28
Location
Blackburn
Its definitely messed with your head, its not a big deal. All us girls do it. Do you still love him then?? Be honest xx
Honestly there are still feelings cause of our son I know they're there but when we had sex it was refect (think that's how it spelled probably isn't) for me. I know I shouldn't but I just needed to feel you know loved like someone wanted me and that I'm somewhat beautiful but know that's stupid to think like that. He did hurt me emotionally in our relationship and he has owned up to it that's why we both know being in a relationship wouldn't be good if either of us...sorry I'm 30 and so stupid and it doesn't help that I look after our son most of the time while he works....my son is in bed with me now crying and it's making me cry.
 
G

Gem

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Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
43
Location
Liverpool
I was with my first love 2 years and we split, he was living with parents at the time and so was i. It was about a month later, he said he had his nans house for the week, and would i like to come round. Obviously, being still in love i ran at the chance, he used me and i never heard from him again. Im glad now, he is vile hahahaxx
 
G

Gem

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Joined
Dec 23, 2020
Messages
43
Location
Liverpool
I promise you, if you message me privately you can take my number and if your ever feeling like that you can call me xxx
 
Mummyoftwo

Mummyoftwo

Active member
Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
28
Location
Blackburn
I was with my first love 2 years and we split, he was living with parents at the time and so was i. It was about a month later, he said he had his nans house for the week, and would i like to come round. Obviously, being still in love i ran at the chance, he used me and i never heard from him again. Im glad now, he is vile hahahaxx
Haha sometimes I honestly wish he did what the father of my daughter did and just walk away from us it would have been easier. My daughter's dad walked when she was one and didn't bother until he had a new girl who he's going to marry and a new baby then he's girl not even him asked if he could see her after all these years. I wish he did that it would have been hell I know but probably easier in the long run
 
Mummyoftwo

Mummyoftwo

Active member
Joined
Dec 6, 2020
Messages
28
Location
Blackburn
I promise you, if you message me privately you can take my number and if your ever feeling like that you can call me xxx
This phone I have no credit at all on it even when I try to too up it doesn't seem to work. X I had couniling before Christmas but cause it was only a six week thing it finished before Christmas and I can't go back into the couniling until maybe March next year
 

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