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I don't like my episodes very much

dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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Joined
Oct 21, 2014
Messages
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Location
australia
....oops oh hell!

getting some kind of warning about an episode would be nice.

...and is making a fool of myself some kind of important?... to not really do?

I find myself trying desperately to be stable enough so that I can interact ...

for more than 3 minutes...

and I know deep down that I cannot!...

I feel like I am 'exhibit z'

...in an alphabet of meaningless..

and I hate to care... 'because caring means vulnerability'!...

I do not want to be vulnerable...

I do not agree with how I deal with it...

this does not mean I disagree with how I ignore the cause!

I can stare at the world with one eye...and use the same eye to convince the other eye to stop looking for reasons why I am a mess..
 
BlueBerry

BlueBerry

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Joined
Sep 13, 2014
Messages
1,261
Location
Edinburgh
Sounds really rough!

My rollar-coaster of moods always makes me act like an ass in front of people at the worse possible times. By myself, I often go through very stable calm moods. When I actually need to interact with someone for once, I'll say something stupid, weird and inappropriate and I laugh and smile too much. :D

Or I'll just shut down completely and stay as quiet as I can. I should do that more often because staying quiet is often better than speaking up and sounding stupid and weird.

Episodes and mood swings are a pain in the butt, that's for sure! :BLAH:

Take care,
Blue xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx :hug:
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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Joined
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Messages
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Location
australia
I love your very cute and very effective way of expressing yourself..

you gave me a smile....hmmm

still got it!
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 21, 2014
Messages
1,000
Location
australia
I cannot do this 'computer' thing any more.

this "social media" impersonality is a nightmare for a bipolar borderline beginning at a 'personality'

dm 'out!'
 
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