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I dont know what to do :-(....

F

fighting spirit

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Nov 7, 2012
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I've been trying so hard to distract myself from my thoughts. No one really gets my way of thinking, My care co-ordinator is leaving and i really get on with her she understands me and knows most things about me, i dont get on with my family so i cnt really turn to them, my best mate has turned away as shes got a new boyfriend so im completely invisible to her now.

i really dont know what to do, i have all these emotions and knowing i have BPD makes it more difficult to talk to people and just simply not having a head that i feel makes any sense and got different thoughts coming in all at the same time its confusing and i cant keep up with myself sometimes,

feeling abit hopeless :(
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Distraction is all well and good, but sometimes one just feel so alone and in need of a friend. I know the feeling. :rolleyes:
When is your care co-ordinator leaving? Have you met your new one yet? It might be worth asking for a meeting with both your old and new care co-ordinator. So that she's there to introduce you to whoever's taking over.
It's really hard when friends get into new relationships and are kind of vacant, it's like they forget who's been there for them. Have you told her that you feel a bit pushed out now? Do you think that maybe it's worth saying to her that you want to hang out because things aren't great with you at the moment?
You know you can always post here and talk in as much depth as you want about things. I was having a bad time a few days ago, but it did help to write it all down here.
I'm wondering as well if there are any other friends you could talk to, or if it's really just this one friend you have that understands?
 
calypso

calypso

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Hiya fighting spirit,

So sorry you are feeling so bad. Have you met your new care co-ordinator yet? Hopefully, your old one can hand over all about you in detail. Has she actually got you any therapy yet, like DBT? It can really help with BPD - or so I am led to believe. I know I am close to my care co-ordinator and it is difficult, but maybe a new one will bring fresh eyes to your condition - its a possibility.

Try to stay safe tonight, and take care xxx
 
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fighting spirit

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hey thank you somerset scorpio and calypso for replying :) yeap apparently i did meet him with my care co-ordinator but i dont remember it because i didnt want to deal with it so i shut down but yeah i suppose it will happen anyway and better if i have control over it. I have started DBT but its still fairly new and i take ages to trust people, thats why im worried i might just completely break down once she leaves and its at the end of this month- so daunting!

in terms of my best mate, im only there when she needs me and i feel an absolute idiot to still be right there and do anything for her even tho shes treated me like shit recently but because we've been through so much together it kills me to just forget about her and try convince myself i dont care. i dnt wnt to tell her just coz i dont want her to know she has that power- so confusing- but i know she doesnt do that but then i dont know if im just tryin to convince myself that, thats not what kind of person she is.... i hate having BPD grrrr....

thank you boths your comments have helped alot and its really appreciated xxx
 

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