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I don't know what is this

B

blueorange

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 27, 2014
Messages
203
I have bipolar disorder and up to now me and my pdoc focussed on this. Since this is the main issue I couldn't ask about my other problems.

First of all everything makes me nauseous. Not physically but mentally. I hate going to the toilet or washing my hands and face or brushing my teeth because I hate bathrooms. I feel like it is always dirty. I don't want anybody to use my bathroom, even me. Whenever I need to use toilet I got sick, not feeling well, I don't know how to explain this. I'm afraid if this will continue like this I will stop drinking. At the same time I'm obsessed with my teeth. I'm afraid of tooth decay so I have to brush. Every single day I think about my teeth, if they are ok or if something is wrong with them.

The other problem is much more difficult for me. I hate some human noises, like cough. I hate to hear cough :( I got very nervous and very depressed when someone coughs:( I can't tell how I hate this noise. Since I have no right to tell someone not to cough I just got angry inside. If this person is staying at my house and coughs regularly for some time I start to dislike this person :(

But I don't have compulsive behaviours, as I understood. So I don't know what is this. I feel sick again since I write about the things I hate.

I have much more. Life is difficult with them.

By the way I feel like I'll be disgraced if I mention this to my pdoc so I want to understand the problem beforehand.
 
Last edited:
StillFighting

StillFighting

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Joined
Dec 28, 2014
Messages
508
Hi blueorange, I am sorry that you're having such a hard time with these things. I imagine that it must be quite difficult for you, not understanding or knowing how to deal with them.

I don't have any similar experience, so I'm afraid I can't be of much help. Hopefully someone may come along with more insight. However, I do suggest discussing them with your doctor. What makes you think that you'll be disgraced? I think their role is to help you not only deal with things, but also understand them. If you feel stuck, even in your understanding of the problem, perhaps they can give you insight.
 
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