I don’t want to bring it into this horrid life

[WorthlessElefant]

When I got pregnant I had been in a deep state of depression for 2 months. I wouldn’t get up, eat, clean myself, nothing. My day consisted of just nothing, hardly even looking at my phone. I ended up getting a nasty infection and had to got to the hospital which is where they told me I was expecting. At first I was happy and I had a better attitude in general, but I slipped into old habits fast. I’m now 12 weeks and am still having that painful infection that they keep prescribing different antibiotics for. I’m no longer excited or hopeful. I just attempted to take my life but my husband popped in unexpectedly. I’m really done. Every second is agony and I can’t help but think I would pass this mentality on to my child. I don’t really have an ender but I wonder if there’s anyone else out there that is at this edge as well.

 

[goodgollymiss]

Please don't kill yourself. Being pregnant is so special. I've always wanted to become pregnant but I can't attract guys

 

[goodgollymiss]

Children usually have better lives than adults

 

[TravelingSparrow]

Sounds like u really need some help. I mean what if ur husband found his wife?
That would be traumatizing. And be so hard to move on after that. And you don’t know what you would be missing out on. Having a family with a child and seeing your eyes or lips on their face features and teachings and showing them all the cool things in the world.
Can u direct your attention to the new life your going to have? There’s a lot that goes into planning to have a child. And it may seem overwhelming, but just write lists and make step by step plans then take it one day at time.

I do suggest maybe seeing your doctor or going to emergency room, especially if you fear you may try to hurt urself. Suicide attempts often end in brain damage or loosing limbs...

Maybe get into a group for women who are pregnant. Might be on zoom. So u can get around some people who are in similar position.

If your home is not good, there is always adoption. I’m adopted and very grateful for it, my adoptive family is much better than my biological family.

 

[Mayflower7]

Hi Worthlesselefant,
I'm so sorry your struggling, please get some help.




If you’re thinking about suicide and are in immediate danger, please call your local emergency number (i.e. in the UK call 999, in the USA or Canada call 911, in Australia call 000 and in New Zealand call 111) or call the international emergency number of 112.

If you have been affected by the contents of this thread and would like to speak to someone about your feelings you can call one of the following helplines:

In the UK and Ireland, the Samaritans can be contacted on 116 123.
In the US, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is 1-800-273-8255.
In Canada, the Suicide Prevention Service on 1.833.456.4566.
In Australia, the crisis support service Lifeline is on 13 11 14.
In New Zealand, the Need to Talk service is on 1737 or 080017371737.
Other international helplines can be found at www.befrienders.org.

 

[WorthlessElefant]

Sounds like u really need some help. I mean what if ur husband found his wife?
That would be traumatizing. And be so hard to move on after that. And you don’t know what you would be missing out on. Having a family with a child and seeing your eyes or lips on their face features and teachings and showing them all the cool things in the world.
Can u direct your attention to the new life your going to have? There’s a lot that goes into planning to have a child. And it may seem overwhelming, but just write lists and make step by step plans then take it one day at time.

I do suggest maybe seeing your doctor or going to emergency room, especially if you fear you may try to hurt urself. Suicide attempts often end in brain damage or loosing limbs...

Maybe get into a group for women who are pregnant. Might be on zoom. So u can get around some people who are in similar position.

If your home is not good, there is always adoption. I’m adopted and very grateful for it, my adoptive family is much better than my biological family.

Honestly I’d want my husband to find me. He hurts me and verbally assaults me. Tonight he actually busted my lip open because I told him I didn’t want to live anymore

 

[WorthlessElefant]

Please don't kill yourself. Being pregnant is so special. I've always wanted to become pregnant but I can't attract guys

You can get pregnant through a sperm bank btw

 

[Whale4sun]

When I got pregnant I had been in a deep state of depression for 2 months. I wouldn’t get up, eat, clean myself, nothing. My day consisted of just nothing, hardly even looking at my phone. I ended up getting a nasty infection and had to got to the hospital which is where they told me I was expecting. At first I was happy and I had a better attitude in general, but I slipped into old habits fast. I’m now 12 weeks and am still having that painful infection that they keep prescribing different antibiotics for. I’m no longer excited or hopeful. I just attempted to take my life but my husband popped in unexpectedly. I’m really done. Every second is agony and I can’t help but think I would pass this mentality on to my child. I don’t really have an ender but I wonder if there’s anyone else out there that is at this edge as well.

Yes me. I presume they gave you medication to help deal with you depression. If they did then know that you will feel better soon. This time isn't good for most of us. Your husband turning up unexpectedly probably is a sign to keep going. Keep going I know it's tough but just keep going and be courageous.

 

[celticlass]

Ok. Now I cannot diagnose you but it sure sounds like you are still depressed. Who wouldn't be when in the first trimester of pregnancy and having their lip burst? So you need an action plan.

I think you need to contact the midwifery service overseeing your pregnancy. Failing that contact social services duty and in either case ask for help for you and your baby, please.
I think you need the following
1. To move to a place of safety. This might be a womens refuge - then on to your own tenancy.
2. Immediate physical checks on you and baby by midwifery services.
3. Proper evaluation of your mental health. Suitable treatment plan to be implemented and closely monitored.
4. Ongoing support to sort out necessary practical matters.

That's just the basics, you will have things to add yourself.

Please get away from your husband before the abuse escalates. Good luck. It would be nice to hear how you get on. PM me if you wish xx

 

[TravelingSparrow]

Your husband being abusive is a whole different thing.
There’s houses for moms who are trying to leave an abusive relationship where they can be safe.