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I don’t know what to do anymore

  • Thread starter 7920NewbridgeCovina
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7920NewbridgeCovina

7920NewbridgeCovina

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Joined
Aug 19, 2020
Messages
55
Location
Minnesota
I have a baby that seems to be getting all of his teeth at once. A friend of mine watched him over the weekend and didn’t put him down the entire time. He will not let me put him down. My boyfriend told me that I could come pick him up from work and he would tell them that he had a family emergency. I told him no. I don’t want to feel guilty for possibly getting him in trouble or having him be short funded. I also don’t know if I should trust myself to drive. I was just going to deal with it.

I finally sorted all of the laundry for the day. The baby starts crying and the dog pees all over the clothes and floor and bed. I’m taking 5 baskets of folded laundry. I lost my shit. Beyond lost it. I put him in the garage and picked up my screaming baby and sat on the floor crying hysterically for almost an hour. He finally fell asleep and I put him down only for him to wake up again less than a minute later. I bottle of booze and a fresh bottle for the baby.

I’m currently sitting on my bed with piss covered pants and feet holding him because I can’t put him down on the dirty floor.

Four hours. I have to make it four hours in this room without self harming before he comes home from work. At least drinking is keeping me from thinking of the things I want to do to myself.
 
J

Jolly

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Joined
Dec 26, 2020
Messages
656
Location
United Kingdom
Please try and get some help. So sad you are in such a situation. Please get some sort of support xx thinking of you
 
7920NewbridgeCovina

7920NewbridgeCovina

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 19, 2020
Messages
55
Location
Minnesota
I want to. I really do. I just can’t afford to do therapy right now. I haven’t had a job in nearly a year because of having an infant and everything with covid. I’m just so tired. Every doctor I’ve gone so has left me within a month of me starting to see me. My OB. My family doctor. My psychiatrist.
 
J

Jolly

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Joined
Dec 26, 2020
Messages
656
Location
United Kingdom
Do you have something like a crisis team. We in the us have the Samaritans we can ring when things are too much xx
 
7920NewbridgeCovina

7920NewbridgeCovina

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 19, 2020
Messages
55
Location
Minnesota
Do you have something like a crisis team. We in the us have the Samaritans we can ring when things are too much xx
I’m sure we do. I’m worried that they’re going to show up and take him away from me.
 
J

Jolly

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2020
Messages
656
Location
United Kingdom
Can you not ring anonymously or just even chat to them. If not write everything on here and I am sure somebody will advise you better than I can. I feel so sad for you. I will send you a hug xx
 

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